I want me a:
Shaker
Strainer
Jigger
and Shot pourer.
I have amazon prime so no need to account for shipping.
I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.
Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.
Ask anyone what they think about crowdfunding games and, more likely than not, they will bring up at least one well known disaster in the past few years. From controversial and disappointing affairs like Mighty No 9 to complete trainwrecks like Yogventures, many have had to learn the hard way how much of a gamble backing a project can be. Of course, there are also some projects so disastrous and poorly pitched that no one would likely support them to begin with. And in 2012, following the overnight sensation of titles like Double Fineβs Broken Age that brought video game crowdfunding to the mainstream, one company (or possibly one man) set out to create the most fraudulent campaign he could.
A Grand Dream
MYTHIC: The Story Of Gods And Men burst onto the scene in April, 2012. Created by Little Monster Productions, the company pitched a brand new RPG epic for PC and Mac platforms. Gamers could choose which storyline to follow based on their chosen fate (From Biblical figures like Lucifer to Greek gods like Zeus), and explore an open world across forest and mountains. Soon enough, they could fight the βTop Godsβ of other religions, conquering the world and enshrining their beliefs across Earth. The player could even choose their morality, and thus which deity to support.
But the campaign wouldnβt just deliver a game, even if the $80K asking price seemed a little low for such ambition. In fact, the money would mainly go to securing a motion capture animation team and music seeing as outside investors had already nearly funded the base concept. Even better, 5% of profits would go to undisclosed projects on Kickstarter that interested the team, and merchandise (or shall I say SWAG) from shirts to swords were soon to be rolled out for interested backers. On top of all this, the company was being run by ex-Activision/Blizzard employees! This is 2012 so donβt worry, that's supposed to be a good thing.
Really, the opening pitch alone set the bar high.
>Mythic is and action/strategy based RPG brought to you by the same team that left Activision / Blizzard in search of something better! MYTHIC is an open world concept that will allow you to choose where you want to go even if it does not coincide with the story line and current missions list (hey, sometimes we ju
... keep reading on reddit β‘Hi! In this part, we finally see the outcome of the Battle for Sol! I hope it was what everyone wanted, because I really enjoyed writing this one! There's still a few parts of our tale to go, but now that my classes have started I'm probably going to wrap this one up soon. Thanks for reading!
P.S. Part 8 will be here soon.
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Alliance Research Station-01, Freedoms' Triumph. Assignment: Project Last Resort.
βWhat in the name of the ancients is going on?!β Shouted lieutenant Ugila as the blast door to the safe-room slid shut with a final hiss. The echoes of screams and gunfire could still be heard on the other side of the door as the people inside caught their breath. Aside from Ugila there were only two other soldiers, along with a pair of scientists.
βThe Hybrids received a faulty wake-up signal! Theyβve gone rogue!β One of the scientists said, frantically working the communication terminal within the room. Ugila had taken this deployment because she had thought it would be low-risk: who would attack a facility no-one knew existed? The very things they were creating, apparently.
βIβve got communications with outside!β The scientist reported. βOhβ¦ Ancients save us.β They said in fear.
βWhat? Whatβs going on?β Ugila asked angrily, her and her soldiers keeping the weapons trained on the door: the gunfire and screams had drawn away, but the muffled sound of footsteps was just on the other side.
βThat unauthorized signal wasnβt just received by us! Nearly every single facility working on the Last Resort project has activated, and the Hybrids gone rogue! Weβre attempting to use the pathogen implants, but the activation sequence has been disabled somehow!β
βHow many facilities have activated?β Ugila asked, starting to understand the fright in the scientists voice.
βSeveral dozen. The program was to have a facility on every inhabited planet in the Alliance, for protection. Now there are armies of angry Hybrids on half of the core planets!β
βWe canβt afford to worry about that right now! How are we supposed to be out of here?!β Ugila asked. As the unmistakable sound of a cutting torch sounded from the other side of the door,
... keep reading on reddit β‘Chapter Twenty Five: Unshackled and Tested
CLANG!!!
THUMP!!!
THWACK!!!
Blood trickles down Redβs face as she manically rams her forehead against any and all surfaces. Blinding white pain surges through her entire mind, but no stolen memories return. The sounds of war above her only intensify as she walks circles within her cage like a mad dog. Sheβs scared, what is there to do? These bastards know her so well, and yet she canβt recall a scrap of helpful information about them. Other than that they are insane warmongering cultists of her own species of course. She needs to remember how to fight them, how to beat them. People are dyingβ¦ people are dyingβ¦ theyβre all gonna dieβ¦
βYouβre gonna die.β
Red spins to see yet another one of her kind. But this oneβs different, smaller and beyond familiar. A childβ¦ with red hair and piercing green eyes. The borders of this girl blends with the world around like a watered down stain of paint, shaking away any small aspect of doubt whether she is real.
Red staggers up to the bars, grasping at them with a drawn defeated sigh. What more can these people do to her? Havenβt they already made their point? What can be the purpose of this?
βGetβ¦ madβ¦β the child orders in a shaking tone through a shut mouth.
Tilting her bleeding head, Red narrows her eyes and grunts.
βYouβre probably going to die anyway. So justβ¦ let goβ¦ and hurt them as much as you can.β
Redβs grip on the bars tighten, but her gut knots and twists in resistance to the temptation. She shakes her head in denial.
From the stairs erupts the sound of splintering wood and shouts of both her kind and not.
For a moment the girl flickers out of existence. When she comes back she is slightly older, dressed in what seems to be a basic, sharp uniform. Her wild hair buzzed short, eyes filled with contempt.
βThey stole everything, and they still want more. No more*β¦* β
Thick Terran arm muscles tense and flex causing the Iron bars to groan and quake. Red locks eyes with the girl, heart pounding, rage flooding.
βNohβ¦ moaβ¦β the Terran utters in a strained guttural voice.
The hinges to the door begin to shutter and buckle along with the meager locking mechanism.
The girl breaks a smile showing a missing tooth. Then she pulls a metallic bat out from behind her, resting it upon her shoulder.
In a loud snapping crack and a sharp lift upward the entire door comes free and clatters to the ground like a concentrated
... keep reading on reddit β‘I didnβt believe Aiden when he told me about the job. 45 an hour no prior training, and part-time. It was almost a perfect situation for me while I finished up the last of my online college classes. The only problem was that it was in the middle of the woods at a place called the gentlemanβs sorcery society.
We drove out to the specified location only to find roads didnβt go out that far. After half an hour of stumbling through the forest as Aiden failed to read google maps, we finally spotted something.
In the middle of the evergreens stood a gray wooden single-story house with a concrete fence sticking out from either side. That looked out of place in the forest but wasnβt particularly strange. What was strange was the massive oak with a treehouse situated within its branches rising behind the concrete fence. As I stared at this unusual architectural construction I also noticed two men standing on either side of the porch.
βYou think that's the sorcery society,β Aiden said giving a halfhearted wave to the men.
Strangely neither waved back. They continued standing motionless their backs against the house like sentries. I felt a shiver run up my back. βHello?β Aiden said waving both his hands above his head.
The two men remained frozen. Part of me wanted to turn away and yet I had to know. Why were they standing there like that?
βMaybe they're like the queen's guard or something?β Aiden said, βI mean-β
βI need to see whatβs going on,β I said walking forward towards the house.
βDude waitβ¦β
I didnβt listen. When something's bothering me I need certainty. As I approached them they looked even more off. The way this stood was too stiff with their bodies holding nearly the same position and their heads facing slightly downwards. The only movement was their hair in the wind. And their faces. Something was very wrong. These men werenβt living people.
βOh goddammit!β Aiden laughed. βThey're just mannequins.β
I let out a sigh of relief. He was right. Two plastic dummies dressed in cargo shorts and gray t-shirts stood backs to the wall of the gray house. Still fucking creepy but at least they werenβt dead. As I examined the porch further I saw a circle painted to the door with the letters GSS inscribed in the middle of a seven-sided star. There was also a small piece of paper taped below.
βJob applicants please go inside.β
I looked back at the shadowy trees behind us and the stationary mannequins. Hopefully, there would at least be a living person in
... keep reading on reddit β‘Hello all and Merry Christmas! With Alchemy Stars celebrating itβs 6-month anniversary, and the upcoming dragon maids banner, now is a great time to start and so I wanted to provide a guide to help people started in what has turned into my favorite gacha game.
Why alchemy stars?
The devs are very generous, you can get the majority of the 6-star aurorians just by playing. You also get (mostly) meta aurorians for free after completing a set of challenges, called old seal units, as well as some solid freebies after beating certain story chapters. You get summoning currency a bit faster than Arknights Edit: generous might be too strong a word, someone said βfairβ and I like it. F2P get a little less than 40 pulls per month, probably can push it above 40 if you do the surveys, secret territory, spire, etc. 36 pulls average for a 6-star.
The gameplay is adaptable and if you donβt like one team comp, there could be another that completely changes your opinion on the gameplay. Itβs more of a sandbox than a puzzle, in my opinion
The story is solid, but the events are what really shines. The current one is really well done and letβs you get to know the aurorians who mostly all feel really distinct from each other. Also, the protagonist evolves over time, as he starts very naive since he was locked away for many years. There is an upcoming anime too. The events also bring in completely new mechanics every time (fighting AI aurorian comps, 15 round battles, boss fights with modifiers, and even an OSU-like mini game)
the art is incredible. there is live2d husbandos and waifus galore. Even furry bait if thatβs your thing lmao. For the style, think Arknights, but the art is more fantasy-driven and turned up to 11.
Overview
Iβll go over team building in a second, but for rerolling purposes there are two paths you can go down right now given the current banners. The first, and one I will recommend, is rolling for fire. The other option, which will be a bit more difficult, is going for water element.
Another topic I will mention in this guide is building the right rooms in the colossus. You can essentially double your energy and daily lumamber (the premium currency) income by focusing on the right aspects.
In terms of how each battle flows, itβs turn based, with you starting. Each aurorian has a specific element out of 4 elements they correspond to. If your unit is fire, then they will show up whenever you draw a path over fire tiles, and deal damag
... keep reading on reddit β‘In season of the Splicer, the seasonal artifact, the Paradrome cube, had some interesting lore that came with it; (sorry for formatting, itβs not fun on mobile)
> Mithrax sat on a carpet in his meager quarters, held the Paradrome Cube in his hand, and concentrated. > > Hours passed before Eido, concerned, sat beside him. She touched his arm. > > What do you see?" she whispered. > He saw the Endless Night split open. He saw fluid falling like white rain on the City. Massive Minotaurs rising from the shallow seas. He saw the gunfire of the Guardians in the Tower, but it did not reflect on the rippling liquid, and he dismissed the vision. > > A hundred more illusions took its place, then a thousand, then a thousand lifetimes' worth: > > βa shape frozen inside a crystal prison a towering figure in white recognition flooding bloodshot eyes a city of voices speaking at once shadow taking form the realization they had always been watched tears on metalβ > > A choice, and its consequences. > > Lies," he answered plainly.
In the entry, Mithrax is trying to gather information from the Paradrome Cube, after being interrupted by his daughter, Eido, he retells what he sees, a vision of the Vex invading the Last City through the Endless Night, with guardians having to intervene.
A second vision occurs, one of a crystal prison, this vision is much more sporadic, given only a few cryptic words per event, summed up as βa choice, and itβs consequencesβ.
It ends with Mithrax simply declaring the visions as lies to Eido.
Analysis
The main point of interest from this text is the prophecy depicting this season;
> βa shape frozen inside a crystal prison a towering figure in white recognition flooding bloodshot eyes a city of voices speaking at once shadow taking form the realization they had always been watched tears on metalβ > > A choice, and its consequences.
We know itβs of this season from the introduction, βa shape frozen inside a crystal prisonβ. Thatβs a pretty vivid description compared to the rest of the passage, Iβm fairly certain even SavathΓ»n herself described it as her crystal prison.
Now for the fun part;
A towering figure in white
This is the only one Iβm totally unsure of, great start, I know. My only guess is since this entry was put into the game before SotL, itβs setting the stage as the Dreaming City, with the Keep of Wishes? (I think thatβs what itβs called, I always f
... keep reading on reddit β‘Do your worst!
