5 yrs into this Rimworld and only a single funeral.
Well-equipped sappers from a non-tribal rival faction take advantage of a misty winter night to raid swiftly among shadows and fog... We have defended against two mech clusters in the past 2 yrs already, and I guess that made us reckless against mere humans. The west-end was just reinforced as a five-layer stone wall, but the turrets weren't built yet and there were no viable defense positions if invaders made it through that way. And they did it...Staggeringly fast with their plasteel melee weapons and sticky bombs.
And the greed..... It was just things! A couple of solar panels and a geothermal power unit would be all the loss if we had just let them rush in and applied some multi-angle rush, basic re-taking strats... But no! We had to try and take 'em face to face. Mere humans but weaponized to the teeth...
The psychic drone whispering pernicious thoughts maybe had a role in the series of bad decisions, maybe it is just an excuse to hold on to.
All gone soldiers fought bravely and died instantly. And at least we did not lose all and everything and that's thanks to Bill "the Barbarian" and our beloved leader, the Glorious Praetor Nicole "Squid" the First. Some serious ancestor warrior vibes ran through Bill spirit as he activated his jump-pack armor to land behind enemy positions with his persona Zeushammer, which yelled guttural chants in his mind to inspire his swings. Nicole had just blessed him with the gift of psychic anesthesia so he started slamming heads and torsos and did not stop until hate and blood seemed all that he ever knew. 1, 2, 3, 4 (and counting) impudent raiders were put down as he unleashed his rage and strength, some of them headless.
Nicole took advantage of the distraction and rushed around the now safe, lost positions, trying to stabilize fallen soldiers. She went back to her loyal bodyguard Alex 'the Hunter' but she knew the two medkits she had in her backpack would not suffice. She insisted in a leap of faith and patched him up as good as her limited knowledge of human anatomy allowed. She unexpectedly managed to bring him to safe ground, rushing again to the nearest med-stockpile to try and put down his bleeding for good. Thats when she hears Bill feral voice filled with a mix of deep grief and victory! Raiders fleeing, horror in their faces and limbs left behind... He rushes back in despite all the dizziness from the exhaustion, and try to help his leader with t
... keep reading on reddit ➡Phil
Sudden Lee
Go post NSFW jokes somewhere else. If I can't tell my kids this joke, then it is not a DAD JOKE.
If you feel it's appropriate to share NSFW jokes with your kids, that's on you. But a real, true dad joke should work for anyone's kid.
Mods... If you exist... Please, stop this madness. Rule #6 should simply not allow NSFW or (wtf) NSFL tags. Also, remember that MINORS browse this subreddit too? Why put that in rule #6, then allow NSFW???
Please consider changing rule #6. I love this sub, but the recent influx of NSFW tagged posts that get all the upvotes, just seem wrong when there are good solid DAD jokes being overlooked because of them.
Thank you,
A Dad.
Well, toucan play at that game.
Martin Freeman, and Andy Serkis.
They also play roles in Lord of the Rings.
I guess that makes them the Tolkien white guys.
Windows
She said apple-lutely
'Eye-do'
This is my first post pls don't kill me lol.
The people in the comment section is why I love this subreddit!!
Cred once again my sis wants credit lol
Keep in mind, my son is 4 years old, so everything is an original to him.
I had to work late into the evening yesterday, and he was just going to bed when I got home. I had left home for the office nearly 14 hours prior, had a long day, lots of meetings, traffic, etc.
When I walked through the door, I was exhausted, run down, and starving. My wife hugged me and asked how my day was, and I replied, "Done. It was a good day, but has got me exhausted. I just want to grab a bite and go to bed. I'm hungry."
From my son's bedroom, I hear him shout, "Hi Hungry! Nice to meet you!"
Not only did it make me laugh, but I completely forgot about how hungry and tired I was. I went to his bedroom, and we laughed together about it. It was exactly what I needed.
Edit: Thanks for all the awards, kind strangers! I'll let my son know y'all enjoyed his joke too!
I heard parents named their children lance a lot.
First post please don't kill me
Edit: i went to sleep and now my inbox is dead, thank you kind strangers for the awards!
Japan.
second hand stores!
it's Hans free now..
Old Neeeeiiiiighvy
10+10 is twenty and 11+11 is twenty too
A buck-an-ear!
I Thank ye kind Matey for the booty! I be truly overwhelmed! Thank you!
Holy cow! Thank you everyone for the upvotes and awards! I wasn’t expecting this!
He should have a good vowel movement. His next diaper change could spell disaster though.
and not:
Making it all the way home and realizing that they forgot one of the containers:
Riceless
That was the punchline
It’s for Hispanic attacks
Without missing a beat he asks "Daddy, do you know how much room you need to grow Fungi like that?"
I did not know.
So he tells me "as Mushroom as possible!"
So proud.
Feyonce
He was so brave and even tried to encourage us, the family around him, with his last breaths. He kept whispering to us to Be Positive.
