Nurse: Here is the list of heart, liver and kidney donors arranged in alphabetical order.
Doctor: Thank you. It is very organ-ized.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Apr 30 2021
What do you call someone who has had their liver removed?
π︎ 10
π
︎ Mar 26 2021
During an autopsy, why are the heart, kidneys, liver and lungs arranged alphabetically?
π︎ 442
π
︎ Sep 12 2020
Ugh
π︎ 4k
π
︎ Mar 22 2021
John was the best liver surgeon in his hospital.
I guess you could say he always delivered.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Dec 16 2020
A Chihuahua and a Bulldog are in a bar having a drink, when a good-looking female Collie comes up to them and says, "Whoever can say liver and cheese in a sentence can have me." So the Bulldog says, "I love liver and cheese." The Collie replies, "That's not good enough."
Finally, the Chihuahua says, "Liver alone, cheese mine."
π︎ 112
π
︎ Oct 07 2020
A man once donated his own liver to someone in need.
Hey may not be alive, but he was delivered.
π︎ 13
π
︎ Sep 23 2020
I'm sure he'll grow up to liver healthy life.
π︎ 17k
π
︎ Apr 16 2018
I'm sure he'll grow up to liver healthy life
π︎ 63
π
︎ May 02 2020
Why do women have a difficult time working for the postal service?
π︎ 10k
π
︎ Jan 06 2021
I fell asleep in the cab and later I woke up with my liver missing
I'm starting to think that the driver who said he'll "deliver me" was a bit shady.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Aug 20 2020
I need a liver transplant, luckily you can just get them from Amazon these days. It should be arriving today...
The tracker says it's 'out for delivery'
π︎ 3
π
︎ May 11 2020
My friend amputated his liver. Now he is just O
π︎ 15
π
︎ Nov 08 2019
What is the leading cause of liver disease in Canada?
π︎ 22
π
︎ Feb 27 2020
News was the baby had a fatal liver problem even before it was born
Luckily in the end, it was safely de livered
π︎ 5
π
︎ Mar 24 2020
I had some liver delivered
And received an empty box
π︎ 16
π
︎ Jan 25 2020
I think my postman is an organ donor.
His truck says, βWe deliver for you.β
π︎ 12
π
︎ Mar 10 2021
So while at the dr recently, he told me an ultrasound revealed I have a fatty liver
I looked him dead in the eyes and said look at me, I weigh 360 lbs I have a fatty everything.
π︎ 16
π
︎ Jan 01 2020
Due to a liver problem, I was advised to give up alcohol.
So I now identify as M, I gave up the ale
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jan 30 2020
Doctor: I'm going to deliver the baby. . .
Me: Actually, we'd like him to keep his liver.
π︎ 16
π
︎ Mar 21 2021
To make a chicken pate...
...one has to de-liver the chicken.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Mar 13 2021
I am donating liver to a Redditor who was in need
Guess you could say
(β’β’) / ( β’β’)>ββ‘-β‘ / (ββ‘_β‘)
OP De-livered
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^Not ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^actually
π︎ 59
π
︎ Jan 13 2016
Nurse: so hereβs our list of donor hearts and livers in ABC order
Doctor: wow. Looks very organized!
π︎ 9
π
︎ Jan 30 2019
Why would prometheus make a good mail carrier?
He has alot of experience with de-livering.
π︎ 10
π
︎ May 01 2020
I told my wife we were having liver and onions for dinner and she said that's disgusting!!
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jan 26 2019
I had kidney and liver pudding for dinner last night.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Nov 05 2018
My dad refuses to eat calve's liver.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Sep 25 2018
Thanks to cod-liver pills my son is a genius at painting and computing.
Heβs got arty-fish-oil intelligence.
π︎ 12
π
︎ Mar 07 2017
Is life worth living ?
It depends upon the liver.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jan 28 2021
What is the most common liver condition among Canadians?
π︎ 27
π
︎ Aug 18 2016
I threw a bottle of Omega 3 cod liver oil pills at my son earlier...
His injuries are nothing more than super fish oil
π︎ 23
π
︎ Aug 15 2016
Who was King Arthur's alcoholic knight?
π︎ 35
π
︎ Oct 28 2020
Apparently if you eat a polar bear's liver you'll get sick from too much vitamin A; someone suggested testing this so I called the butcher and asked them to send some over...
...But unfortunately they said they don't deliver polar bear.
π︎ 42
π
︎ Aug 23 2016
Which part of our body lives the longest?
π︎ 29
π
︎ Oct 10 2020
The mailman had to get part of his liver removed.
I guess you could say he got delivered.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Aug 04 2017
Why did the Amazon package wake up in a bathtub full of ice?
Because it was de-livered.
π︎ 17
π
︎ Dec 15 2020
I ordered a liver sandwich from a local deli and all I got was 2 slices of bread with mayo on it.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jun 28 2017
Zeus' eagle de-livers
π︎ 9
π
︎ Mar 10 2014
Know anyone with liver problems?
I think thistle do the trick. (My fiance did not appreciate this joke.... I thought maybe you guys would!)
π︎ 14
π
︎ Nov 01 2015
I was going to get a Pizza delivered
Then I realized Pizzas don't have livers.
π︎ 79
π
︎ Jun 18 2020
When I promise to come up with an organ transplant pun.
π︎ 45
π
︎ Sep 06 2020
Don't buy foie gras when you go shopping!
It's always best de-livered.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Nov 08 2020
Was told you would like this: As kids on the way to McDonald's, my father used to torment us to the point of tears by telling us we were going to the fictional Wong's House of Liver instead...
This is what I got him for Christmas this year:
http://i.imgur.com/3luzi1J.jpg
π︎ 7
π
︎ Jan 04 2014
What do champions put in their hair?
π︎ 9
π
︎ Jul 08 2020
"hello, thank you for calling Hannibal's..."
π︎ 3
π
︎ Mar 14 2020
Liver...
π︎ 5
π
︎ Sep 01 2016
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