I was describing one of those what ... are you quizzes. In this case it was how left wing are you.
"I got Karl Marx" I said.
"Oh really, I got full marx" said my dad
Because the left wing was completely destroyed!
My girlfriend and I are starting our food truck next year and we have been trying to come up with a great name for the truck. We are looking to make it a Pun hence the hopeful help of the Sub-Reddit. We will be serving chicken wings with a bunch of different sauce recipes and all we've really come up with so far is 'Lord of the Wings' but I was wondering if the creative minds of the internet could think of something better.
I'm not sure if I'm breaking any rules here or not, I just thought what better place to find the answer than here? Thanks!
"Now don't forget, righty tight, lefty loosey. Just like with woman."
After 21 years I still haven't quite figured out what he's getting at.
...two small breasts, two large thighs, and a left wing.
I was talking to a friend on Skype; at one point, I realised that I had to go to the bathroom.
"I'll be right back, I have to pee," I said.
"All right sure," she replied.
When I left, I put my laptop on the floor, the screen facing upwards, so as to avoid the ventilator being drowned by my duvet.
When I returned, I realised the webcam was pointing toward the ceiling, and I asked her:
"Did you find my ceiling interesting?"'
"Nah, I was looking at something else,"
And then, I saw my chance. It was glorious. Like golden wings borne on scarlet sunlight had brought me to Enlightenment, and I instantly replied with what is perhaps my greatest feat of pun yet:
"You know, that really hurts my ceilings."
It’s all because of the left-wing liberal median.
I actually got my dad with this one, and I was so proud.
I was getting ready to head back home after visiting my folks for Thanksgiving. My mom is, of course, insisting that I take insane amounts of leftovers home. My dad pulls out what's left of the turkey.
Dad (rube): "All we've got left are the legs and wings. Are you sure you want those?"
Me (smart): "Of course! You know I like the Napoleon pieces."
Dad: "The what?"
Me: "The Napoleon pieces."
Dad: "........."
Me: "The bony parts."
They couldn't wait for me to leave.
In response to /u/rsocfan getting Reddit banned in Russia, the following conversation ensued:
> This is an impressive mark to have left on history. I mean, some people cause 48-car pileups on the high way, you get an entire site blocked from an entire country.
> I make chicken wings all day.
-/u/backstagecoffee
>chicken wings
> Your contribution is also important. How else would chickens fly?
-/u/stovenn
Link to the thread containing /u/stovenn's joke
