A list of puns related to "Just!"
As a big proponent of the dadjoke I want to argue that a dadjoke is not just a pun. I see lots of material submitted here that might be better suited for /r/punny.
Speaking as a dad, for me a classic dad joke is highly dependent on the context.
I can't whip out old standbys at any moment and call them proper dadjokes. If I'm driving my kid to school I can't just ask him "Hey, do you know why the kids couldn't see the pirate movie? It was rated aaarrrgh!". That's just a bad joke.
OTOH, if my kid says "are" kinda funny (which he has before), and I make a joke about him being the youngest pirate I know (I may or may not have done this before), then that's a dadjoke. A shitty one, but still a dadjoke. The best context ones are where a situation presents itself and the dad takes the opportunity to make the lame joke (as in a post from awhile back where the OP overheard three or four dads make almost the exact same joke at an aquarium).
Straight up puns should go to /r/punny. Context specific jokes which rely on vagaries of the language or the funny situation, should stay here.
Just my two cents worth.
Serious question. I'm a dad, and I have several long-running jokes with my kids.
E.g., there's a "radiator monster" in the basement. Yeah, that knocking sound when we turn the steam up in the morning. Well, my eldest is getting smarter and smarter, but he still can't refute my claim that there is such a monster. Because he's not yet aware of the actual cause of the knocking/banging.
So, he's unsure!
This is a good Dad-joke, no?
They asked me to please Hold. ππ€²
That will give you a reason to get out of bed in the morning.
Can't believe I've spent all that money and have nothing to chauffer it.
The mortician asked the deceasedβs wife how she would like the body dressed. He points out the man looks good in the black suit heβs already wearing. The widow however said she thought her husband always looked his best in blue, and she would really like him in a blue suit. She then hands the mortician a blank cheque and says βI donβt care how much it costs, but please have my husband in a blue suit for the viewing.β The woman returns the next day for the wake. To her delight she finds her husband dressed in a gorgeous blue suit with a subtle chalk stripe. Remarkably, the suit fit him perfectly. She says to the mortician, βwhatever this costs Iβm very satisfied, you did an excellent job and Iβm incredibly grateful. How much did you spend?β To her astonishment the mortician presents her with her blank cheque, and he says βthereβs no charge.β Shocked she replies βno really, I feel like i must compensate you for the cost of that exquisite blue suit.β βHonestly maβamβ, the mortician says, βit costs nothing, you see a diseased gentleman about your husbands size was brought in shortly after you left yesterday. He was wearing an attractive blue suit. So I asked his wife if she minded if her husband went to the grave wearing black. She had said it made no difference so long as he looked nice. So from that point on it was really just a matter of switching the heads.β
A hammer.
Poor bastard.
People are showing up to the hospital eh-symptomatic
Solid, liquid and gas
...an ether/oar situation...
She looked me dead in the eye and said, βWindow or aisle?β I laughed in her face and replied, βWindow or youβll what?β
Shit..l meant to post this somewhere else.
They didnβt workout.
Edited: It changed to they.
Thanks lornstar7
How mean.
He actually grew up in Ukraine in the 1980βs and was able to count at least 8 historical inaccuracies on one hand.
I always thought he was a theoretical physicist.
.. Only got 20%Off
Well itβs not a law itβs a mandate
The police are combing the area
I told her I think itβs worth a shot
He said "I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know..."
It Taurus apart. I'm in Pisces typing this.
Gonna be their spokes person
I can also tell when they're standing.
All I did was take a day off.
De-calf-inated
Iβm kinda nervous though...Iβve never ran that far before.
That isnβt a good sign.
I said βGreat, I can Babylon about it for hours!β
and the box said 2-4 years!
Which is strange, because I donβt have any kids.
Don't ask meow
That my local prosthetics shop is changing hands.
I wonβt be spoken to in that tone.
My next poop could spell disaster.
It doesnβt make any cents.
It just kept on ringing.
They asked me to hold it.
I can tell when they're standing too.
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