Iphone 5 Puns

The spider is dead, the iPhone screen is cracked, and my son is furious!

"Take these tablets twice a day and if it doesn't work, get me an iPhone 12.

Maybe my iPhone is just broken.

But iPhoned it in

I decided to do a drop test with my friends on my iPhone 6s to see if the screen would break. It didn’t break so I said “ I guess you could say that test was a 6s.”

Was trying to figure out how to use her new iPhone to shoot photos at night using night mode. She gave me the phone and said, here figure this out. I took the phone and pushed one button, and voila, night mode. She looks at me at this point and says, how did you know that would work? My reply...

I don’t know, I was just taking a shot in the dark.

Mic drop.

The assistant says “Ok I’ll serve the iPhone 11 first then”

My 14 year old daughter got up from the table after eating a bowl of cereal, so I told her to put the milk away. Then we had this exchange:

"Before you put that back in the fridge, why don't you plug it into the iPhone charger on the counter first?"

"What? What are you talking about?"

"Yeah, you gotta charge up that milk. It's only at one percent!"

I say it so often now that my kids stopped eating cereal, and have pretty much cut dairy from their diets.

iPhone is in the swimming pool now

The iPhone sixcess

Then your mother said: He sure did! Look it's on M' iPhone too.

iPhone Hell Heaven

Because iPhone seven eight nine

They sent the guidance computer into the air and it didn't break.

However if you send an Iphone into the air, chances are it's going to break.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh

What do you call bears with no ears? b

What do you call a human with no hum? someone who isn't annoying

what do you call a dear with no eyes? no eye dear

Why does Johannesburg have no vampires? Because the rain is blessed in Africa

Why did the storm trooper buy an Iphone? because he couldn't find a good droid

Did you hear about the kidnapping? It's ok, he woke up

My boss told me to have a good day. So I went home

So today, I bought an IPhone XR. Turns out I was rick rOLED.

It’s too bad because I only seem to be able to find androids and iPhones now.

So I bought an iPhone 7 case for my girlfriend and we often put puns on our gifts to each other. It's a clear case with a flower print on it. Any help thinking of puns greatly appreciated!

Why isn't an Apple iPhone charger, called apple juice!?!?

It's called the iPhone XI

• What's the difference between mononucleosis and herpes? You get mono from snatching kisses.

• If you were to lose your left arm, you'd be all right.

• Why can't you hear a pteradactyl going to the bathroom? Because the P is silent.

• Communists only write in lower-case letters because they hate capitalism.

• I got a new job at the police sketching pictures of suspects. I'm a con artist.

• Cat Woman's real name is Catherine Woman.

• I have a new cat joke. ...Just kitt'en.

• How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Look for Fresh Prints. *

• Did you hear about the two men who stole a calendar? They got six months each.

• I just saw an Apple store get robbed. Does that make me an iWitness?

• Dwarfs and midgets have very little in common.

• I'm moving to Seoul. I was told it would be a good Korea move.

• Did you hear about the professor who was killed in a car accident? He was grading papers on a curve.

• Why isn't an iPhone charger called Apple Juice?

• Ever try to eat a clock? It's very time consuming.

• When Peter Pan throws punches, they Never Land.

• I was struggling to understand how lightning works, but then it struck me.

• Einstein developed a theory about space. And it was about time, too.

• Apparently Neil Armstrong used to tell unfunny jokes about the moon, and then follow up with, "Ah, I guess you had to be there."

• I'm going to make a TV series about a plane hijacking. We just shot the pilot.

• Would you call a drunk working at an upholstery a recovering alcoholic?

• Yesterday I got covered in ketchup from my head tomatoes.

• Even though I've gone bald, I still keep the same comb I've had for 20 years. I just can't part with it.

• Picture of my sister after getting her nose pierced "She nose something!"

• I went to the dentist and showed him my cavity. He told me to pull up my pants and get the hell out.

• Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It was okay - he woke up.

• So what if I can't spell armageddon. It's not the end of the world.

• When you get an infection, urine trouble.

• "Hey waiter! This coffee tastes like mud!" "Yes, sir; it's fresh ground."

• How did the butcher introduce his wife? "Meat Patty."

• Elton John is a great piano player, but he sucks on the organ.

• Elton John wrote a tribute to Amy Winehouse: Candle Under the Spoon *

• What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Captain Morgan? Captain Morgan comes alive when you add coke. *

*My absolut

The iPhone 6 and its big brother the plus has just been launched and already websites are crawling with the next iphone slated to launch in sep-oct of 2015 and experts are wondering if the new iPhone under Tim Cook's management will flop or be a....6 s?

Me: So why is there and iPhone 7,8, and 10, but no iPhone 9?

Him: 7 ate 9

Despite Apple selling record numbers of iPhone 7 units, I think Samsung will definitely be remembered as the hottest tech company of the year.

She's got an iPhone 6S and wanted a case, so I let her know she could also try and iPhone 7 case, but it covers the headphone jack.

Wife: I really like this one

Me: Now are you really okay with it covering the headphone jack?

Wife: oh this one doesn't, it's open at the bottom

Me: Huh. So it's on a case by case basis?

Let's just say I got my daily recommended value of eye roll.

Iphone 7 is hitting some record sales, but the note 7 is really catching fire.

I'd call it the Iphone Xpensive.

Do you think it will be because the iPhone 7 8 9?

My dad and I walk into the Verizon store because my mom's iPhone mysteriously stopped working. The clerk working at the front desk came up to us an asked us a few questions about the phone. He asked my dad, "Have you ever introduced the phone to water?" To which my dad quickly responded to with "Yes, I said, phone, this is water. Water, this is phone. " the clerk didn't get why my dad and I started laughing.

Dad: "What's the pass-code for your iPhone?"

Mum: "The year I was born"

Dad: "I don't see B.C anywhere..."

(laughs to himself while he unlocks the iPhone to play Candy Crush)

I do iPhone repairs, and I was working on my dad's phone while talking to my friend:

"It'd be awesome to have a customer named Napoleon." "Why?" "Because then I could take Napoleon's phone apart."

Someone mentioned that they had dropped their iphone in a pot of chicken stock. I replied that they should have put apple soup on the menu the next day. At least I laughed.

There we are, sitting in my parents living room when my mom asks me "how do I get my iPhone and iPad in sync?" I told her "ask my sister, just hope she doesn't make them in sync on the backstreet" to which my dad chimed in "boy that ain't no lie". So I said "I know. I think I need to go home. Bye bye bye."

Find one that claims that it can charge an iPhone 5 times, to which my dad says:

"Those batteries better not be Li-ion to us."

He replied: "why isn't IPhone's battery life called Apple juice?"

Father: Why won't my iPhone charge on this laptop?

Me: It needs to install the driver first.

Father: Are you sure? It charged just fine in my car.

Me: Your car doesn't need a driver.

Father: Yes it does. If I ever want to go anywhere.

He thinks he is hilarious. I had to hold back the laughter and groans. I couldn't let him think he's funny.

I don't understand: iPhone cases don't cost more than $50. Why does one need to go to the supreme court?

Boss: "You know, I don't usually like blackberries, but this one was good"

Me: "Yeah me neither. I'm more of an iPhone guy, myself"

Commense groaning throughout the office.

Me and my friends decided to do a drop test on my iPhone 6s. When we dropped it, it didn’t break so I said “I guess you could say that test was a 6s”