TIFU by boarding the wrong ship and almost starting World War III

Sorry, wrong sub

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bignicky9
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2020
🚨︎ report
TIL: During the American Revolution, George III didn’t even bother to leave the couch.

He was sofa king comfortable.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Happened when we were watching Star Wars III

Right at the part where Windu dies

Dad: "Wow. I guess he got thrown out the windu."

πŸ‘︎ 1k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Zandril
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2015
🚨︎ report
What was Vlad III's favorite piece of furniture?

His Ottoman.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/themannamedme
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2017
🚨︎ report
In Ancient Rome, there were 4 types of poison.

Poisons I, II, and III would all kill you with varying degrees of pain.

However, Poison IV would just make you really itchy.

πŸ‘︎ 13k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SnakehoundXE
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I hate that I laughed so hard at this
πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CasuallyCritical
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2020
🚨︎ report
A drummer and her husband just had triplets. Their names?

Anna I. Anna II. Anna I, II, III.

πŸ‘︎ 50
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jfshay
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2020
🚨︎ report
A King has 3 cups. The first 2 are full and the 3rd is empty. What is the King's name?

King Philip III

πŸ‘︎ 984
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/flushyjames
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2017
🚨︎ report
What was the funniest tank in WWII?

The Punzer III

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/EtNoX
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a fish with ten eyes?

Fiiiiiiiiiish!

πŸ‘︎ 49
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kage1330
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2016
🚨︎ report
In honor of an old episode of The Simpsons, I have decided to start a rock and roll band and call it "Three Eyed Fish".

The name will appear as : **Fiiish**

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/slowshot
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2018
🚨︎ report
Brainstorming food/movie theme nights. It es-kale-lated quickly. Only thing in my Bumble profile now.

When Harry Met Salad

What About Ke-Bob

Cumin to America

Weekend at Bearneaise II

Steakin I, II, & III

A Few Good Salmon

You’ve Got Kale

Shawshank Re-Dim Sum

Romancing the Scone

An Γ‰clair to Remember

Roman Hollandaise

Glazed and Confused

Bill & Ted’s Eggcellent Adventure

The Evil Bread

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang Shrimp

Fondue the Right Thing

Ribeyes Wide Shut

Mignons

Plante of the Grapes

Spider Manchu

Sushis All That

A Wok to Remember

Marsala-la Land

Apocalypse Cow

Die Chard

Die Chard with a Vinaigrette

Hogan’s Gyros

The Sand Latkes

A League of their Macaroni

Revenge of the Curds

Rush S’More

Braising Arizona

Demolition Ham

10 Things I hate About Ewe

Saladin

Oliver and Com-penne

Dirty Rotten Chanterelles

Sex and the Satay

The Truth About Cats & Hotdogs

Morella Enchanted

Provolone Together

Clear and Pheasant Danger

The Big Chili

LΓ©mon: The Professional

Ava-Tartare

Hocous Pocous

High Fi-Deli Meat

Madagascargot

The Fifth Elementos

Muensters Inc.

There’s Something About Rosemary

I Am Ham

Quiche Lorraine Man

Barley & Me

Lentil Giants

Peggy SoufflΓ© Got Married

Face Stroganoff

Con GruyΓ©re

Fast Times at Porridgemont High

Bok Choys in the Hood

Papillonion

Requinoa for a Dream

Serial Cardamom

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kat_fogg
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2019
🚨︎ report
My Grandfather earlier today

Grandfather: Wanna hear a pig with 3 eyes?
Me: Sure!
Grandfather: Piiig.
Edit: Formatting because I'm mobile.

πŸ‘︎ 63
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BabyNickels
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2015
🚨︎ report
Is there a prize for the most laborious set-up?

Down on his farm, Old MacDonald was hosting his annual talent contest amongst his animals and announced that, this year, the theme was Shakespeare.

All of his livestock had been busily and excitedly rehearsing because they knew that 1st prize was to be a gigantic gazebo festooned with flashing electric lights, a glitter ball, a speaker system and turntables.

Competition was fierce; the chickens performed Othello, the horse chose Hamlet, the sheep Romeo and Juliet and the cow performed Richard III.

After much deliberation, the farmer and his wife ordered a hushed silence and announced: "Cow is the winner of our disco tent."

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JeffGoldbuns
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2014
🚨︎ report
My gamer wife is a dad, apparently

Playing Diablo III with the missus.

Me: Man, I need more emeralds.
Her: If I could give you emeralds, I would give you lots of emeralds. I would give you so many emeralds, you could be Emerald Lagasse.
Me: ...
Her: BAM!

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Gwompulator9000
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2014
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.