It's pretty obvious, that if you run in front of a moving car, you will get tired. But if you run behind it..
..do you just get exhausted ?
The first mention of cars was in the New Testament.
I Acts it says they were all in one accord.
As I put my car in reverse, I thought to myself...
If you see an email with ground pork and processed ham in the subject line, don’t open it...
Someone is stealing tires off of police cars in my area
The police are working tirelessly to arrest him.
What do you call a vampire in a car?
Funny how in the past everyone owned horses and only the rich owned cars, and now everyone has cars and only the rich have horses...
My how the stables have turned.
Edit: Wow guys, thanks for all the love!
My dad was ready to roll in on the jokes when coming to pick me up after school in his "DIY self-driving" car. Everyone knows though...
Why was the German Blitzkrieg in WW2 so effective?
Because their enemies did NAZI it coming
My wife got awarded our car in the divorce. It was a brand new Kia.
Now all I've got is Nokia!
2 drunk guys getting into a fight. One gets up and draws a line on the ground. He says "you cross this line and I'll punch you in the face".
That was the punchline...
Why was the church song leader so happy when a member of her congregation was killed in a car accident?
The deceased was an organ donor.
I’ve never been in a car accident
Did you hear that a car full of garlic, ginger, and lemongrass ran a red light in the middle of the city, injuring tens of people?
It was a fragrant disregard for public safety.
When I'm running late dropping my kids off at daycare, I call in to my 8am Zoom meeting from my car.
I call it, "phoning it in."
What car did Jesus drive in the bible?
An Accord,
“For I did not speak of my own Accord.” John 12:49
Why do people in Africa only use electric cars?
Because they’re Mad-at-gas-cars
Went out in rain this morning but got hit on the head with a car part.
It was raining Datsun Cogs.
How do you keep water in a hole in the ground until you need it?
Car Salesman: And if you don't like this color, we have another one in "Boulder Gray"
Me: Gray isn't very bold to begin with, how did you make it bolder?
Wife: ...
If the air conditioning in your car dies, you just need some WD-40.
What did the cowboy say when he went into the car showroom in Germany?
A man had his car stolen by a thief in Mexico. When he went to the police...
Tiger Woods was in a car accident this morning...
What’d that cab driver say to the guy getting in his car with a cheap hooker?
When he found out I was sick, my friend messaged me, hoping that I will quickly find a deep hole in a ground full of water.
I'm happy he wished me to get well soon.
Tiger Woods in a massive car crash.
Should have used the driver.
Dad puts the car in to reverse and thinks
I hope no-one is behind us
I got in a car wreck and lost my left arm, but don’t worry...
I’m all right.
buh-dum-tsss
A snail was zipping around the neighborhood in a car with a large S on it
I told the wife "Look at that S car go!!"
My brother dug a hole in the ground, filled it with water then designed a moving staircase that was powered by it.
That well escalated quickly!
My 16 year old son was in the kitchen baking up a storm when my wife came downstairs. "What are you doing?" she asked him. "I'm going to have a bake sale to buy a car," he answered. "Where on earth did you get that idea? We're in a pandemic! No one is going to buy baked goods!" He said...
"I heard on Reddit that you need cake to get the car, ma."
Two atoms walk into a bar, one says to the other “Dang, I left my electrons in the car.” The other replies, “Are you sure?”
I just saw Jesus & a couple of His disciples drive past me in a new car
Looks like it was a Christler
There's a scarcity of parking space in our vicinity but our premises are relatively big. So, I regularly help nearby companies by offering them a space for their cars on our grounds.
Did you hear about the guy who bought an electric car and got in a wreck just after he left the dealership?
He turned over a new Leaf.
What kind of flower do you have if everyone in the country drove a pink car?
Crime in multi storey car parks.
As I put the car in reverse, I thought to myself:
"This really takes me back".
As I put my car in reverse, I thought to myself...
As I put the car in reverse, I thought to myself....
As I put my car in reverse, I thought to myself....
Running in front of a car will get you tired, but...
Running behind a car will get you exhausted
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
