Gas Leaks Puns

Not wanting anyone to be in danger, the town called in two investigators to check and see if the gas would be a hazard to the people nearby. The investigators took all their equipment and began to check if the gas would react to anything. They tested for common gases after taking small samples but none of them had a major presence. Undaunted the investigators pushed on and tried for rarer and rarer gases but found nothing. After hours and hours of checking and turning up no reactions, one investigator turned to the other and said, “Maybe the gasses are gone.”

A woman was at a gas station filling her car with gas. She inserted the nozzle and began filling the car with gas. As she waited for the car to fill, she lit a cigarette and began to smoke it. The car clicked to indicate it was full of gas, and she pulled the filler out of the car. Some gas leaked out of the filler onto her sweater arm, and a spark from the cigarette lit her arm on fire. The woman began to scream for help, and waved her arm about trying to put the fire out. A highway patrolman who happened to be nearby ran over and saw the woman flailing about in pain. Without hesitation, he pulled his handgun out of the holster and shot her three times. A few weeks later in court, the judge asked the patrolman why on earth he shot that woman? The patrolman answers, "well your honor, she was waving around a firearm!"

We were talking about the natural gas issue going on in California(where we live), and how we haven't heard much about it. He said was ridiculous people aren't being informed about it, to which I replied:

"I guess you could say they didn't want the information to be...leaked."

He said, "Lame." But still laughed.