I tried watching Edward Scissorhands earlier. Turned out it was just a video of Tim Burton getting his hair done.
I then realised I'd picked up the director's cut
Why was Edward always on his computer during winter?
Because he was Snowden.
What is Edward Benedict's, Humpty Dumpty's cousin from New York, favorite time of year?
The Hollandaise
Did you hear about that Japanese foodie who got became transgender and now goes by Edward, but then got pregnant and had a baby and joined the baby bloggers?
His blog is called Ed - A Mommy.
Very clever of you Prince Edward Island. imgur.com/tRpy578
What’s Edward Snowden’s choice of vegetable?
Wikileeks
Why did Edward miss his flight out of Russia?
Because he was Snowden.
Why doesn't Edward Scissorhands like mice? [xpost /r/jokes]
Because he prefers keyboard shortcuts!
-Quite proud of this one, my kids didn't get it, but my wife and I had a good laugh.
Why couldn't Edward go outside to play?
He was snowden
If Edward Snowden ever gets a family, I wonder how long it would take him to look out at a winter day and say 'Looks like we're all Snowed In!'
Why can't Edward leave Russia?
because he's snowed in
Why does Edward Woodward have four D's in his name?
Because otherwise he would be called Ewar Woowar.
Why did Edward get stuck in Russia?
He was Snowden.
Why couldn't Edward depart to his home from the Russian Airport?
Because of the weather, he got Snowed-in :)
Why is Edward Snowden stuck in Russia?
Because he's snowed-in.
