My fiancée's father passed away yesterday. Her father and mother have lived together for several decades starting in Texas (10+ years) and moving to Mississippi (10+years), but they were never legally married.
In terms of social security survivor benefits, we were wondering what to expect when the appointment with the SSA happens next week to discuss it all.
I can't find any official source from the SSA website, but I did find an unsourced answer from nolo.com:
> What if the State I Live in Doesn't Allow for Common Law Marriages?
> If you live in a state that doesn't permit common law marriages, a common law marriage cannot be established, no matter how long you live with your partner.
> However, if you established a common law marriage in a state that allows them, and move later, any state you move to must acknowledge that marriage. This means that you can get Social Security survivors or spouse's benefits in any state as long as your common law marriage was created in a state that permitted it.
https://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/common-law-marriage-social-security-dependents-survivor-benefits.html
So based on this assumption, it sounds like she should qualify? They lived together in the same house in Texas with 3 children, which would qualify as common law marriage. They moved to Mississippi and have still lived together ever since, but Mississippi does not recognize common law marriage. But the common law marriage would have been from Texas.
Is the above claim from this website even correct at all, or is this all a lost cause since they were never legally married? If there is some truth to this claim, is there a document from the SSA or any other federal agency outlining if her mother would qualify for survivor benefits under this situation? (Going into their meeting with a random claim from nolo.com carries absolutely zero weight/relevance in my opinion)
Apologies in advance if I'm way off base on any assumptions about any of this, I've been trying to pitch in and help out as much as possible during this tough time for them. My knowledge of anything on this matter is anywhere from minimal to absent.
I'm wondering if the VA recognizes common-law marriages when it comes to veterans' compensation/benefits? In the state of Texas, I believe that they recognize common-law marriages. I'm just curious because I have been with my significant other for years and I have been living with her for about two years. We are not formally/legally married, but I was curious if I could get retroactive pay? We both have rings on our wedding fingers showing others that we are married. I know that there is no actual documentation of common-law marriages, so if it were possible to get benefits for my SO, would the effective date go back a year, or would it just be when I apply for my SO as a dependent? What type of evidence could I use to justify the effective date? Would I need letters from friends and family? Or would it need to be more concrete somehow?
I've read that the VA does recognize common-law marriages, but I'm not sure if it is still up to date?
The form is VA Form 21-686c?
Or, at least, it isn't recognized everywhere. I'm bored, so I thought I'd leave this here and see what the general consensus is.
For whatever reason, a couple decides to refer to themselves as married while never making it official for whatever reason they have. They call each other 'husband' and 'wife' (or husband and husband/ wife and wife), they live as such, maybe even exchange rings, but they never actually got married. Some states recognize common law marriage after a certain period of time, and others don't recognize it at all.
I get that there may be valid reasons for not making it official; one of you might depend on disability benefits or what-have-you, which you will no longer be entitled to if you got married. You might just not want to go through the hassle or pay for it. But calling yourself married when you're actually not? It's pretentious at best. Why not just say you're together or committed?
Stolen valor is abhorrent, and shame on anyone who does this. But let's make a comparison, shall we? In both cases you are claiming to be something that you're not, and maybe even benefitting from it in some way. You are getting some kind of special acknowledgement for saying that you are one thing, when you really are not. Again, stolen valor = 100 times worse, but it was something I could compare it to. They are not the same, and I know this. People will still be angry or roll their eyes, and that's fine.
If you don't legally have the titles, then that isn't what you are.
I know this is going to offend a lot of people, hence my putting it here.
Edit: Well, this is interesting. Lots of salty people in the comments, so clearly this is an unpopular opinion. Yet I'm being downvoted in a subreddit where you're supposed to upvote unpopular opinions? My opinion hasn't changed, and it won't. Have fun playing House, kids! 😁
Jim had 2 kids, Jane had 2 kids. They meet and fall in love and have two more kids together. They rent at first but eventually buy some land under Jim’s name after 5 years living together. Then they buy more land under both their names. They go on to live together as husband and wife 40 years without officially getting married . Jim dies with no will. Jane goes to attorney who informs Jane that she is recognized as common law wife but only entitled to half the ownership of each property of land. The remaining half of each property is split between Jim’s 2 kids he had before they met. She is not entitled to 100% ownership of either property. Does that sound right ?
Weird, I spent years in Japan and never thought of it. Is a couple legally married? In Canada, a couple living in a common-law marriage are not considered married under Canadian law. However, when their relationship ends, many of their rights are the same as for people in a regular marriage. How does it work in Japan?
I’ve been with my partner for 12 years, and for the majority of that time we were common law married, by Texas State Statute. We (1)agreed to be married, (2)lived together and (3)held ourselves out as married to everyone we knew.
We also filed our taxes jointly, mingled our finances, and got medical and durable powers of attorney over each other as added insurance.
We recently moved to North Carolina and started the initial process of applying for a mortgage. I entered Married on all of our documentation, because we consider ourselves married. It was only after that I bothered to look up NC’s laws and it looks like NC will recognize common law marriages that started in states that recognize them but I don’t know how to go about proving it to anyone.
So are we suddenly no longer married? If not how do we go about assuring that the state will recognize our union if it needs to? Have I accidentally committed fraud?
State: Texas
Is “common law” just a technicality that’s recognized only when pursued by a judge (for a will, divorce/custody, etc) or is it something the state recognizes and files against you without it ever officially being stated?
Like - if I lived the criteria for a common law/informal marriage but then dissolved the relationship, maybe moved to a new state, and then tried to marry another person, would this become some legal confrontation Id have to address with Texas?
My boyfriend and I have been together for four years, but we are unable to marry because I’m waiting on my F2B petition. It will be another 2 years if the bulletins start moving.
I am an H1B and he is currently an F1 student. Will I be violating the conditions of F2B if we declare common law and claim him as a dependent beneficiary on my insurance?
I am already rated and have been receiving monthly disability through the VA for quite some time now. That said, I'm wondering if I can add my fiance as a spouse under the auspices of Common Law Marriage which my state recognizes and so does the VA. But does it apply towards receiving increased VA disability?
So, I’m currently in a common law relationship with my partner who I am committed to and plan to be with forever (he feels the same way). We’re in no rush to get married, as we really only see it as a large party and aren’t financially stable right now. Due to where we live, we experience many of the same benefits a married couple would as common law (for example: he’s on my insurance / benefits). So we don’t really feel a rush, as we’re secure in our commitment to each other and don’t feel a legal push to make the choice.
But, I’ve always had never ending questions around common law vs marriage in the eyes of God. I personally believe “marriage” is just a commitment to someone you love, to be with them forever, through thick and thin (you know …. Very 1 Corinthians 13). God knows I’m committed to him, and he to me. He knows I love him and would never leave him. So - what’s marriage really all about? It doesn’t feel all that different to me.
Then, there’s the sex element. The argument of no sex before marriage, well - even in this case - were already committed forever. What’s the difference?
Id love to hear opinions / thoughts on the matter!
I'm talking about the hypothetical situation where, let's say, a man breaks up with a woman and then discovers that because they've been living together for seven years or something like that, they're actually married even though one or both of them never realized it or intended it.
I'm under the impression that while there are some states where common-law marriage still exists, it isn't going to happen unless (among other possible conditions) both partners are intentionally telling other people that they're married.
No particular reason I'm asking, just want to know the actual facts.
My mother has lived with her partner for over 20 years in the same dwelling/residence in the state of South Carolina. She never married him due to some personal reasons and tax evasion that he did several years back but was planning on it this year. However, they are now about to separate and she is about to be on the street with nothing. Does she have any rights in terms of getting compensation from him or eligible to receive half of personal wealth like a divorce? Thanks your help.
Anytime anyone posts their horrible situation in Relationship Advice or Am I the Asshole: inevitably it comes up that they have been dating 10-15 years. Queue all the comments of, “well you are married anyway” No they are not. I’m not sure of the legalities in other countries, but in the USA eight states recognize common law marriage.
Colorado Iowa Kansas Montana New Hampshire South Carolina Texas Utah
If you are in any states other than these you aren’t married.
If you are in these states and don’t call each other wife/husband, and say you are married and act as a married couple you aren’t married.
I’m sorry y’all but stop pussyfooting around. If you can wake up tomorrow and just walk out you aren’t married.
Hi everyone! I'm finally stepping out of my lurker status to ask an semi-nuanced question since most people seem to be pretty level headed here....
Has anyone found / know of particular invitation language concerning those who are recently considered common-law by the state but are doing the official marriage license, religious ceremony, and reception separately months later due to covid restrictions? I know some people get very heated about not being present for the exact day/time but covid kind of shook things up and none of my family or friends seem to take issue with our current plan of action or situation.
Background:
To preface all of this, most of our family and friends have considered us married / common-law long before we did and the situation below, and the state of NY has recognized us as a domestic partnership through my work for several years now. The religious ceremony is important to my S.O. and several of our family members but I'm not sure how to word our invites or if it matters at all. I don't think anyone we are inviting will think poorly of us or judge us but I just want to be as accurate as possible with the situation in hand.
The state I live in still observes common-law marriage but does prefer those with more formal papers to be on the books. Covid definitely impacted our plans to get married traditionally in Fall 2020 (engaged Summer 2019 / serious relationship since 2014 / dating since 2009) and I had already submitted my stuff with work to file 2020 taxes as joint in January 2020. We moved the date to Fall 2021 because everyone we wanted there has been looking forward to us confirming a safer date while they get the chance to be vaccinated.
This spring we had to file as joint to create fewer waves with my current filing status and the state recognized us as common-law. Now I'm having trouble finding the right wording for our invitations concerning our unique situation. We are host the event ourselves.
Any suggestions? Am I over thinking it?
My fiance and I have been in a relationship since June 2018 and living together since July 2018. He is an immigrant but hasn't got a SIN number. We don't have any joint accounts and I have been fully supporting him for almost 3 years now. We sent them a copy of our lease signed by both of us, but apparently that is not enough proof that we have been living together in the same house since that date or have been cohabitating. We have been engaged over a year now as well. If we get married does that change the status of our application? Will it help?
We have been planning our wedding for next year when covid restrictions aren't as bad and we can actually have people from his country come and attend. But if we just have a courthouse wedding now, will that be enough proof that we are together?
We also requested that our landlord write a letter stating that we have been living here since the date the lease has was signed and asked all our neighbours to write a letter stating they are witness to us living together and being in a relationship as we live in a big house with lots of units. Also when we sent in the application we had a roommate write an affidavit stating he lived with us being a couple. But apparently because we don't have a joint bank account because we can't until he gets PR to get a SIN that's not possible. I did send in a life insurance policy that has him as my beneficiary. I just don't know what else we can send them that proves that we have been living together and in a relationship.
If anyone has gone through something similar and can tell me what you've gone through or advice I'd greatly appreciate any input.
Hi everyone, my long-term partner and I split all expenses down the middle. We plan on buying a home next year and will also split the mortgage, utilities, renovations, etc. 50/50. That kind of model doesn't work for everyone, but it works for us. In the future, we aren't interested in marriage.
We're both on the FIRE path and I may take some bets and start a business in the future that may put me on the path of fatFIRE. Given we have no plans for marriage, is it necessary to create a pre-nupish contract? I was reading about common law marriage and that's apparently still a thing, so this got me thinking.
I'm posting this in r/fatFIRE because I posted something similar in /r/financialindependence a few months ago and got nothing but replies like "If you're not getting married, you shouldn't buy a house together", "you guys should get married - if not, you don't trust each other", etc. Given the sophistication of this sub, I imagine you all understand there are nuances to these kind of situations and there isn't a one-size-fits-all model to life. Also, I'm on the path to FIRE and are taking some life bets in the future which may accelerate my path to fatFIRE, and I want to be smart and prepare accordingly.
Thank you.
Hello, I'm trying to get a sense of how common first-cousin marriage was in ancient/medieval Ireland, on a spectrum from 'practically the norm' to 'socially taboo'. I'm particularly interested in Gaelic-speaking (and by inference, Pre-Christian) Ireland. Insights from other 'Celtic' societies (especially Scottish Gaels, but potentially Wales and Cornwall too) would be welcome as well!
I'm aware the Catholic Church had prohibitions on consanguinity that extended many generations out beyond first cousins, and that this might have been influential later on. However, my understanding is that these prohibitions were most commonly enforced on the nobility. Secular/pre-Christian Brehon Law in Ireland was also very influential amongst Gaelic-society and diverged a lot from church law, not least on marriage matters.
I can't find much on what Brehon Law has to say on consanguinity/'what counts as incest?', although one article mentioned that it did diverge from church law on things such as whether you were allowed to marry a widowed step-mother.
I would guess that first-cousin marriage was allowed and was fairly common (as it was amongst most cultures). But I feel as if this is something we might actually have sources for?
I have realized over my life that I'm asexual - ie I do not experience sexual attraction to anyone of any gender - and for that reason have never been interested in the whole marriage with kids thing. The biggest support in my life is a friend who lives in the USA (I'm a Canadian citizen, they're American). We talk every day and share every detail of our lives, and have done so for over 10 years. I platonically love this person (of the same gender) and want to keep being close to them - probably for the rest of my life. I would love to live with them and share my life with them, but I'm not sure how...
They can't afford to up and move to Canada, and don't have the skills or job potential to immigrate here on their own. I can afford to sponsor them, but to my understanding that only applies to (married) partners and you can only get married if you're in a conjugal/sexual type of relationship. Also to my understanding, common law only applies if you've already been living together, which we can't manage for the reasons above. So we've agonized over how living together is impossible.
After reading through marriage laws and documents for Ontario today I can't actually find anywhere that it specifies you need to be in a sexual relationship to get married... However there are documents for people to assess your relationship to prove your partnership isn't a fraud. We're definitely in a relationship, albeit not a sexual one, so my question is this: do you actually have to be intimately/sexually/conjugally involved to get married and be legally considered partners for sponsorship and immigration purposes? Can you marry and sponsor a platonic life partner or is that some kind of fraud?
(edit: spelling)
