Cocky pun
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πŸ‘€︎ u/y18tube
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2020
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I didn’t want to get too cocky

So I only wished for a medium dick.

It’s still small, but now it can talk to ghosts.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/potatostomach
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2020
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2020
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My cocky jockey friend likes to brag about how he gets to smoke weed while on the job.

I told him to get off his high horse.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FrankDaTank787
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2020
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What did a hen say to a rude rooster?
  • Be a little less COCKy.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/doom_dodo
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
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The Danes are so cocky

But only their dogs are great

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πŸ‘€︎ u/iamesteban
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2018
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They moved the penis museum from Iceland to Denmark.

They classified it as a dick move.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Darr1ss
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2020
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Why did the rooster lose the fight?

Because he was way too cocky.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/darthaditya
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2020
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Race horse Pat

There was a race horse named Pat, who was one of the greatest race horses to ever live. He set records that were near impossible to beat. After a long time of racing, he retired to an old stable with some old friends. They were very happy that he retired there to stay with him, and congratulated him on all of his records that he set.

Once Pat retired, he started keeping track of all the up and coming horses that were winning a lot. There was a race horse named Charlie that was doing really great and winning all his races. Pat saw this horse and watched him race. Charlie started to break all of Pat’s records and Pat was a little upset with this.

After a while, Charlie decided to retire after an extremely successful career in racing. By chance, Charlie decided to retire at the same stable that Pat retired in. When Charlie entered the stable, everyone went up to him to congratulate him on his records and wins. Pat went up to Charlie and said, β€œHey Charlie congratulations on all of your wins! You broke a lot of my records and I was very impressed.” Charlie responds, β€œgo away old man, I’m better than you ever were.” Pat was blown away by his response. He galloped away from Charlie with defeat.

After a while of thinking, Pat decides to challenge Charlie to a race. Charlie agreed to it and wanted to race right away. He said β€œWe will race to the tree over there and turn around and come back and whoever gets there first will be the winner.” Pat was still healthy but he needed a few weeks to get his legs back into shape for the race. Charlie gives Pat 2 weeks to get ready.

After 2 weeks pass, they are ready to race. β€œHey Pat, before we race I want to warn you that I win my races by passing them by the end. So don’t get all cocky and think you are going to win.” Charlie says. Pat thanks him for the warning and they start getting set to race.

The gun sounds and they are off to race. Pat starts out in front, and nears the finish. Out of know where, Charlie zooms ahead of Pat and wins the race.

Pat was very disappointed in his loss, but congratulated Charlie anyways. A dog comes up to them and says, β€œWow, that was a fantastic race! Neither of you should be upset with that. You both were so great!” Charlie looks to Pat and Pat looks to Charlie. They are astonished. Charlie says, β€œSay that again! Say it again!” The dog says a little confused, β€œWell I just said that you both were so great out there.” Pat says, β€œCharlie! It’s a talking dog!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SnappyOrange69
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2020
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My friend is annoyed because his dog keeps trying to pick fights with dogs five times his size.

I told him he shouldn’t have adopted that Cocky Spaniel.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OmegaLiquidX
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2020
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What do you call a cocky archer?

Arrowgant

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mrsilbert1
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2015
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I have a chicken proof lawn

It's impeccable

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hotsprings1234
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2019
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A man with a hole in his pocket...

Feels cocky.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/No_Commment
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2020
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A rooster is running for mayor

He’s not a bad politchicken... πŸ€¦πŸ»β€β™‚οΈπŸ€¦πŸ»β€β™‚οΈπŸ€¦πŸ»β€β™‚οΈ

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bradb717
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2020
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My chickens had a sudden change of leadership

Someone took the first leader's crown. I've heard complaints that he was winging every decision, running around like a headless chicken. He was probably too cocky to plan for coop attempts.

More on this as I find out information.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CoruscareGames
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2019
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Why was the chicken in such a good mood?

He was feeling cocky

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mr_McMuffins
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2018
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I don't like people with guns.

They're very cocky.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrewciferCDXX
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2017
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While driving through Humble, TX, I dad-joked my friend

"You know you're not allowed to have any chickens in Humble?"
"Oh really?"
"Yeah, they're too cocky."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MattO2000
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2015
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Watching chopped with my dad.

A woman that was really cocky got chopped and my dad said this gem.

"Maybe she will come back and make some humble pie."

Jesus...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheGreatKraken
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2014
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Man with hole in pocket

Feels cocky all day

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πŸ‘€︎ u/King_Pinn
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2018
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