"Well prayed"
I was proud of myself for this one:
Son: "Dad, what is Greece?"
Me: "A country in the Mediterranean. They speak Greek there, it's the most spoken language in the world"
Wife: "what? No it's not, that's Chinese"
Me: "Yeah, that's Greek to me"
<Groans>
My native language is dutch and in the sentence "hoe lang" means "how long". When pronouncing "hoe lang" in dutch it sounds like a chinese name. phonetically it would be "Hulang".
So my dad would always say out of nowhere "Hoelang is een Chinees", which translates into "How long is a chinese". Usually the people who hear the joke are clueless and look at him and weird and say "i dont know, i dont think all the chinese people have the same heigth, why do you ask me this?". Then he would say "Huh, what are you talking about? I was talking about my friend Hulang from China hahahahhahaha". He always laughs extremely loud after telling the joke, its part of the routine.
My family was walking in Venice and some guy approached my dad and said "Excuse me sir do you speak Italian?" Dad "No." Guy "Do you speak English?" Dad "No." Guy "Do you speak French then?" Dad "No." Guy "Then what language do you speak?" Dad "English" The guy gave up after that point. Once he left, my dad turned to me and said "That is a youism if there ever was one." I responded by saying "No dad I would have said we spoke Chinese."
