guess she had the wrong package.
All the chain mail.
He has alot of experience with de-livering.
The clean-up that followed was all hands on deck.
I’ll be a sugar daddy.
And boy, did it deliver.
Credit to /u/Repulzz for their post.
I wasn't sure on the crossposting rules, but I really thought this joke was r/dadjokes material.
What a cool idea
Virgin Mobile.
Why is her cellphone bill so high?
Because she's a roamin' Catholic.
Mail ladies.
Me: I've been noticing a lot of mail-ladies recently. Dad: Male-lady? Isn't the correct term transgender?
Bump in the knight
Mail performance anxiety
They could be employed to float aerial advertising banners, but they would likely be porcine carriers.
What do you call a "Can Opener" that doesn't works ?
-A "Can't Opener" !
Why are famous people so cool ?
-Because of their "Fans" !
Why did the man work in the barn his whole life ?
-Because it was a "Stable" carrier !
I hope you guys enjoyed !
They’re really good carriers
It’s probably a good thing considering they’re both well-known carriers.
Rogue one, me zero.
Must’ve been a pretty cool guy
Guess thats natural though in a mail dominated industry.
After the fireworks, we were gathering up our things to leave. She asked if her new turtle was OK. I picked up its little carrier, peered inside, and said, "It looks a little shell-shocked."
you cantaloupe!
Seriously though, this is a two-fer. I was putting a watermelon in a carrier box in the car, saying "There you go little guy, you'll be safe in your own box". My SO rolls her eyes and says 'stop it'.
I say, "What, I can't be melondramatic?"
Carrier Pidgin
My wife and I changed cell carriers, so we have new temporary numbers but when the caller ID comes up, both numbers my name because I set up the account. She called me today...
> Me: Oh my name comes up when you call on the caller id > > Her: You'll have to change that > > Me: Yeah I'll have to fix your faux number
(blank stare)
The whole family is together at the dinner table and my brother had just gotten a new cat. Instead of letting the cat get into trouble he opted to put it in the cat carrier while we ate. Sneaky little thing got out of it's carrier and my daughter blurts out, "Well the cat's out of the bag!" ^I'm ^so ^proud. ^^tear
Just saw this on facebook...
A woman in her eighties made the evening news because she was getting married for the fourth time. The following day she was being interviewed by a local TV station, and the commentator asked about what it felt to be married again at that age and would she share part of her previous experiences, since it seem quite unique the fact that her new husband was a ‘funeral director.’ After a short time to think, a smile came to her face and she proudly explained that she had first married a banker when she was in her twenties, in her forties she married a circus ring master, and in her sixties she married a pastor and now in her eighties, a funeral director. The amazed commentator asked her why she had married men with such diverse carriers. With a smile on her face she explained, ‘I married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go.’
