I've just finished a really good book entitled 'Acted' - I don't really understand the relevance of the title, but the book is about censorship. Anyway, I think everyone should

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πŸ‘€︎ u/staffell
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2020
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Does any have any good puns regarding famous authors or book titles? I'm in desperate need!
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EvTheSmev
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2013
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My Dad's "book titles"...

I have so, so many...

"The Road Is Shut" by Elaine Closed. "I'm Outta Gas" by Phil McCarup "How To Tie Shoelaces" by Ben Doon "A Cliff Edge" by Eileen Dover "A Book Of Churches" by Cath Headrall "I've Eaten Too Much!" by Buster Gutt "A Book On Soft Cheeses" by Phil Adelphia

And finally, "A Book On Domestic Pets" by Rabi Tuch... (...Rabituch...) (Rabbit hutch)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/amysplat
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2013
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kosmozoan
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2015
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I went to a bookstore and saw a book titled "How to solve 50% of your problems".

I bought 2

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πŸ‘€︎ u/elster000
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2021
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I'm reading a book titled "The Stockholm Syndrome."

I hated it at first, but now I love it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13 2020
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For sale: Book titled "The Dangers of Materialism"

Β£150

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2020
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Bilbo Baggins suddenly wakes up and hears someone singing β€œDon’t stop Believing”.

It was an unexpected Journey.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2020
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I read a book titled The Nuts & Bolts of Nuts & Bolts.

It was fasten-ating.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/garbagearmy
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2017
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The other day I read a book titled β€˜Spycatcher’

It was a biography of Moe Berg.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rossum81
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2018
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Freaking pandas
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2019
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Not many people know that Hitler had a twin brother. He was a recluse because he was very possessive and a hypochondriac.

But he did write a book titled "Mine Cough".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/strykerx
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2020
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If I ever write a book of 1001 jokes, I don’t know what the first 8 will be.

But the 9th will be β€œthe title of this book was in binary”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlabamaMayan
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2019
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6yr old FTW

twice today he impressed me.

first were out for lunch and hes kicking me under the table. me: "stop dude, that hurts!" him: "not to me."

then were at a store where they were they currently have a reading incentive program "...read at least 8 of the following titles and receive a free book" him: "so, can i get my free book now?" me: "what? no." him: "but i read all the titles..."

i bought him a book for his efforts.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/neophytegod
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2014
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Dad Joke Inception

While celebrating the birth of his newborn, a son is drinking with his father. The father turns to the son with a gift. "Here son, it is your time to have this" says the father as he hands across a book title '1001 Dad Jokes' "Wow, I don't know what to say" states the son "I am honoured" "Hi honoured, I'm dad"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Snorklenator
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2016
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Make The Little Things Count...

...is the title of this book I’m writing, about teaching midgets basic math.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bellazelle
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2019
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A Dungeons & Dragons Related Dad Joke...

I'm currently running my players through a D&D adventure titled "Curse of Strahd".

Last session, my players found a journal revealing details about the main villain, Count Strahd Von Zarovich. When they acquired it, I passed the adventure book over--opened up to an illustration depicting the journal's pages--and one of the players proceeded to read. After struggling for a bit, he said, "I'm having a tough time reading this cause it's so cursive."

Yes," I responded. "It's the cursive Strahd."

I had that one chambered and ready for weeks, just waiting for the right moment.

What my players don't know is that I'm also going to include a few other bits of flavor for my them to find as they progress through the game:

  • A fancy handbag with the initials "SVZ" hammered into the leather... the "purse of Strahd"
  • A grave in which the Von Zarovich family nanny is buried... the "nurse of Strahd"
  • A carriage very obviously built to accommodate Strahd's coffin... the "hearse of Strahd"
  • A book full of poetry written during Strahd's younger days, before he was consumed by darkness... the "verse of Strahd"
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πŸ‘€︎ u/transplantasian
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2016
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My dad wants to make a joke book...

Dad: I'm going to make a joke book titled "Everything Butt Jokes". Me: How can it be a joke book if it is everything but jokes? Dad: No, son. Everything BUTT jokes as is, Everything of or Related to Jokes about the Gluteus.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheWarGiraffe
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2016
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The hidden puns of LexisNexis

Years ago I used to use a LexisNexis database of companies that would give corporate information like name, address, and general business description. While most of them were pretty bland, there were a bunch of them with some really cheesy puns, and over a few years I built quite a collection.

Today I share with you "NEXIS IS RIDICULOUS.txt":

  • Bucyrus International caters to those who mine their own business.
  • It would be logical for Mr. Spock to boldly go to Vulcan International for rubber products. He might even live long and prosper -- in comfortable shoes.
  • What do manufacturer Electro-Motive Diesel (EMD) and 1970s band Grand Funk Railroad have in common? They both want you to do the locomotion!
  • Peter Piper can pick more than a peck of peppers or pickles from B&G Foods.
  • Toray Plastics America could sing "foam, foam on the range, where the polyester and polypropylene materials are made" all day.
  • Break out the Tums, because things are awfully gassy over at Air Liquide America.
  • If a tree falls in a Weyerhaeuser forest, someone is there to hear it -- and he has a chainsaw.
  • Although not a pushover, you can walk all over Wilsonart International.
  • Here's a HEICO haiku: HEICO companies/ Providing for jet engines/ In flight or on land.
  • American Italian Pasta Company (AIPC) uses its noodle in many different ways.
  • The golf industry doesn't mind when Aldila gives it the shaft.
  • Rat-a-tat-tat and a ringa-ding-ding. What's that? Answer: The sounds emanating from Pearl, one of the world's foremost makers of drums and other percussion and musical instruments.
  • Saint-Gobain Ceramics & Plastics deals powders and crystal, but there's no need to call the cops.
  • Pamida Stores Operating Company offers more small-town values than a bandwagon of Republicans on the campaign trail.
  • Like a tight end, offshore drilling contractor Transocean dreams of going deep but doesn't mind eating a little mud.
  • Rittal me this, Batman!
  • Utility Trailer Manufacturing is spreading its own brand of reefer madness.
  • Who is the Fresh Prince of Sullair?
  • If GrafTech International were a bard, it could wax poetic in an ode to the electrode.
  • When it comes to adhesives and vibration control products, LORD knows.
  • You might say that Deere & Company enjoys its customers going to seed.
  • Pfizer pfabricates pfarmaceuticals pfor quite a pfew inpfirmities.
  • Stripping is OK at Spraylat.
  • Don't think Seton is
... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2016
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Got dad joked at the bookstore where I work today

I work at a large retail bookstore, and my job is basically just to wander around and help people find what they're looking for. Yesterday I spotted an older gentleman looking lost, so I asked him if he needed help finding anything.

"Yeah, the new Dr. Seuss one, whatever it is."

So I led him to the kid's section where we have a whole display for What Pet Should I Get.

"This one's been really popular, as you can guess," I said as I grabbed one off the display for him. As I did so, a few of the books behind it toppled off the display and onto the ground.

"Yeah," he said, "I can see they're just flying off the shelves."

I laughed for a few minutes and he left with his book and the look of satisfaction that only comes from a top-tier dad joke.

Edit: Oops. Put 'today' in the title but it rly happened yesterday. Sorry! :x

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πŸ‘€︎ u/5lash3r
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2015
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1001 Dad Jokes

My brother's wife recently gave birth to a beautiful baby boy, and being a new father, my brother and dad sat down to talk. I heard my brother expressing his concerns about being a new father, and all the challenges it would bring. My dad just smiled and put his hand on my brother's shoulder, pulling out a big, goofy colored book titled '1001 Dad Jokes.' With this, my brother began to tear up. He looked at my dad and said "Dad...I'm honored." My dad, with some tears of pride in his eyes as well sniffled and said...

"Hi honored, I'm Dad."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThatOneRussian
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2013
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I got my grandmother on the topic of Chinese destiny.

My grandmother was getting rid of a box of books, one of which was titled "I Ching." I asked her how to pronounce that word (like e-ching) after which she asked if I knew about it at all. I then responded with "No, but I am I Ching to hear about it!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ShakesOfMilk
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2015
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Dadjoking Shorty (part 1)

A bit of backstory. I'm notorious among my circle of friends for telling "terrible puns/jokes" I think it's amazing, but I'd been rolling them out all day, patience for puns must've gotten shortened.

I'm talking with Shorty (named because she had short hair) and she was telling me about a book she had started.

Shorty "So the book's called 'Cutting for Stone' and it's like a doctor drama kinda thing, the only issue is that that it's super heavy on the medical terminology, so many bloody surgeries and procedures are listed, and I don't really know anything about that kids stuff. Like it's got an interesting plot but I don't know if I can't finish it, I'm not to sure I'm cut out for it"

At that last line I began laughing (her pun was unintentional) and compliment her on it "ha that was good. You're not 'cut out' for it"

Shorty "Oh god that was terrible just stop"

Me "You want me to 'cut' it out?"

Shorty "I'm going to kill you if you keep this up woman"

Me "You're gonna 'cut' me up?"

Shorty "Your jokes are terrible and it's proven that puns make people angry"

At this point I was just rolling in my chair laughing I really couldn't keep it together, possibly the best reply rolls through my head after this comment, I crack up, there I am choking out as tears come to my eyes. "Well it's a good thing it's not a PUNishable offense"

The girl next to me starts laughing as shorty yells at me how I can't just start crying at my own jokes.

TLDR; A witty banter of sharper than usual humor, as I walk a razor thin line of pissing off my friend and pissing myself with laughter.

I have many other stories so I titled this part one,if anybody likes my writing and jokes I'll share the rest!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bingo4913
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2014
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