Mocking me, eh? want to see how this book goes in your face? here is the title " The historical development of the Heart i.e. from its formation from Annelida: Clam worm, Seamouse, Lugworm, Megascolex, Tubifex, Pheretima, Freshwater leech, marine leech, land leech. Arthropoda: Ladybird, Krill, Rock Barnacle, Root-headed Barnacle, Copepod, Silverfish, Cairns birdwing, Silver - spotted skipper, Scutigera, Cray fish, Large white, Andonis blue, Camberwell beauty, Tiger swallowtail, Regent skipper, Black – veined white, Green – underside blue, Blue Morpho, Apollo, Guava skipper, Cleopatra, Large copper, Millipede, Orb spider, Black widow spider, Giant crab spider, Wolf spider, Bird – eating spider, Tenebrionid beetle, Green Tiger beetle, African goliath beetle, Scolopendra, Diving beetle, African ground beetle, New guinea weevil, Barnacle, Lobster, Shrimp, Woodlice, Mite, Prawn, Housefly, Butterfly, Monarch butterfly, Peacock butterfly, Honey bee, Fairy shrimp, Horsehoe crab, Tick, Bluebootle, Froghopper, Yellow crazy ant, Water flea, Sea spider, Fiddler crab, Shiny spider crab, Hermit crab, Sail swallowtail, Red admiral, Morpho butterfly, Desert locust, Stephens island weta, Speckled bush cricket, Mole cricket, Dung – beetle, Euthalia ynipardus, Small blues, Termite, Hornet, Mosquito, Garden spider, Tarantula, Desert hairy scorpion, Emperor dragon – fly, Moth, Centipede, Wood ant, Stag beetle, Indian red admiral, Blue admiral, Harvestman, Hoverfly, Shield bug, Assassin bug, Cicada, Coreid bug, Rose aphid, Water – boatman, Wasp, June bug, Large tortoiseshell, Frog beetle, Mexican red – legged tarantula, Paintedlady, Sydney funnelweb spider, Small tortoiseshell, Mountain bumble bee, Trapdoor spider, Jumping spider, Daddy longlegs spider, Orchind bee, Asian carpenter bee, Parasitic bee, House spider, Giant longhorn beetle, Flea, Bedbug Beetle, Cockroach, Scorpion, Spider, Ant, Gnats, Grasshopper, Silver fish, Crab, Great green bush cricket, Elephant hawk – moth. Mollusca: Neomenia, Chaetoderma, Chiton, Lepidopleurus, Apple snail, Sea hare, Sea lemon, Dentalium, Freshwater mussel, Marine mussel, Pearl oyster, Cuttlefish, Giant squid, Chambered fish, Devilfish. Fishes or Pisces: African glass catfish, African lungfish, Aholehole, Airbreathing catfish, Alaska blackfish, Albacore, Alewife, Alfonsino, Algae eater, Alligatorfish, Alligator gar, Amberjack - Seriola dumerili, American sole, Amur pike, Anchovy, Anemonefish, Angelfish, Angler, Angler catfish, Anglerfish, A
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For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂
It really does, I swear!
They’re on standbi
Pilot on me!!
Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.
This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.
If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.
Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.
What did 0 say to 8 ?
" Nice Belt "
So What did 3 say to 8 ?
" Hey, you two stop making out "
When I got home, they were still there.
I won't be doing that today!
You take away their little brooms
This morning, my 4 year old daughter.
Daughter: I'm hungry
Me: nerves building, smile widening
Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.
She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.
Thank you all for listening.
There hasn't been a post all year!
Buenosdillas
It’s pronounced “Noel.”
After all his first name is No-vac
What, then, is Chinese rap?
Edit:
Notable mentions from the comments:
-
Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits
-
French/Finnish art
-
Country/Canadian rap
-
Chinese/Country/Canadian rock
-
Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap
There hasn't been a single post this year!
(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)
Nothing, it just waved
Bob
So that I could frequently say, "I am going to walk 5 miles now."
Edit: My most popular post on Reddit! 😀 Thank you for the awards.
Just to clarify, 12345678
Me grabbing a soda from my (what I thought was) half full 12pk...
Notices there's only 2;
Me: "Awe man... This is a damn bird box!" Her: "What the hell does that mean?!" Me: (Pulls both cans out & shows them to her) "It's only got Toucans."
I'm not ashamed to admit the look on her face was glorious.
I was just sitting there doing nothing.
“BOOM”?!
"That's what they're fighting about."
Because his Visa didn’t work.
to save the mods time here is the source: Guinness World Records
According to Guinness the book is called: (and yes i did copy and paste the entire title)
'The historical development of the Heart i.e. from its formation from Annelida: Clam worm, Seamouse, Lugworm, Megascolex, Tubifex, Pheretima, Freshwater leech, marine leech, land leech. Arthropoda: Ladybird, Krill, Rock Barnacle, Root-headed Barnacle, Copepod, Silverfish, Cairns birdwing, Silver - spotted skipper, Scutigera, Cray fish, Large white, Andonis blue, Camberwell beauty, Tiger swallowtail, Regent skipper, Black – veined white, Green – underside blue, Blue Morpho, Apollo, Guava skipper, Cleopatra, Large copper, Millipede, Orb spider, Black widow spider, Giant crab spider, Wolf spider, Bird – eating spider, Tenebrionid beetle, Green Tiger beetle, African goliath beetle, Scolopendra, Diving beetle, African ground beetle, New guinea weevil, Barnacle, Lobster, Shrimp, Woodlice, Mite, Prawn, Housefly, Butterfly, Monarch butterfly, Peacock butterfly, Honey bee, Fairy shrimp, Horsehoe crab, Tick, Bluebootle, Froghopper, Yellow crazy ant, Water flea, Sea spider, Fiddler crab, Shiny spider crab, Hermit crab, Sail swallowtail, Red admiral, Morpho butterfly, Desert locust, Stephens island weta, Speckled bush cricket, Mole cricket, Dung – beetle, Euthalia ynipardus, Small blues, Termite, Hornet, Mosquito, Garden spider, Tarantula, Desert hairy scorpion, Emperor dragon – fly, Moth, Centipede, Wood ant, Stag beetle, Indian red admiral, Blue admiral, Harvestman, Hoverfly, Shield bug, Assassin bug, Cicada, Coreid bug, Rose aphid, Water – boatman, Wasp, June bug, Large tortoiseshell, Frog beetle, Mexican red – legged tarantula, Paintedlady, Sydney funnelweb spider, Small tortoiseshell, Mountain bumble bee, Trapdoor spider, Jumping spider, Daddy longlegs spider, Orchind bee, Asian carpenter bee, Parasitic bee, House spider, Giant longhorn beetle, Flea, Bedbug Beetle, Cockroach, Scorpion, Spider, Ant, Gnats, Grasshopper, Silver fish, Crab, Great green bush cricket, Elephant hawk – moth. Mollusca: Neomenia, Chaetoderma, Chiton, Lepidopleurus, Apple snail, Sea hare, Sea lemon, Dentalium, Freshwater mussel, Marine mussel, Pearl oyster, Cuttlefish, Giant squid, Chambered fish, Devilfish. Fishes or Pisces: African glass catfish, African lungfish, Aholeh
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