Accordion to research, 9 out of 10 people don't notice when you replace words with random musical instruments.
Please donโt resort to violins and anger if you donโt notice.
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︎ Dec 06 2020
When I was a kid, my parents would always say, โExcuse my Frenchโ after a swear word...
Iโll never forget that first day at school when the teacher asked did we know any French...
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︎ Dec 30 2020
I gots two words that will leave you all scratching your heads.
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︎ Dec 15 2020
My 4-year-old son has been learning Spanish all year and he still can't say the word, please.
which I think is poor for four.
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︎ Nov 28 2020
What's a word that doesn't rhyme with itself?
Football, chocolate... I dunno, lots of things don't rhyme with "itself".
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︎ Dec 04 2020
What is the only 4 letter word sport that starts with a 'T'?
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︎ Oct 29 2020
What word becomes shorter when you add two letters to it?
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︎ Dec 26 2020
He followed the instructions word-for-word
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︎ Dec 14 2020
Whats another word for toll booths?
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︎ Dec 13 2020
Dad, I need help writing a sentence using the word "irony."
Try this :
I licked a golf club and it tasted irony.
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︎ Dec 03 2020
Just found out that 'Aaarrrgggghhh' isn't a real word.
I can't tell you how angry I am.
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︎ Nov 26 2020
Apparently you canโt use โbeefstewโ as a pass word
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︎ Dec 17 2020
What's the longest word in the English language?
Smiles. The first and last letters are a mile apart.
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︎ Sep 28 2020
I just made up a word
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︎ Dec 07 2020
I looked up the word 'opaque' in the dictionary...
....but the definition is unclear.
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︎ Dec 16 2020
What is a necromancer's favourite word to use to cast a spell?
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︎ Dec 30 2020
The word "liner" is so important
that it's under "lined" in the dictionary.
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︎ Dec 28 2020
Using the word โbutโ in an English Assignment is good,
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︎ Dec 27 2020
"You just mark my words"
I said to the English teacher.
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︎ Dec 10 2020
Teacher: Use the word oath in a sentence
Student: Mike Tyson eaths oaths for breakfasth every morning
Edit: made this up today, have merthy on my thoul
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︎ Dec 02 2020
I told my teacher I learned a new word, Plentiful
She said โcongrats!โ
I replied โthanks, it means a lotโ
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︎ Nov 19 2020
During breakfast, my dad said, โLet me sum up 2020 in one word.โ
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︎ Dec 24 2020
The best safe word to use during sex is โmeatloafโ
Because it means, โI would do anything for love, but I wonโt do thatโ
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︎ Oct 04 2020
Who invented the word invention?
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︎ Dec 29 2020
If Mark has been accused of plagiarizing my content; Mark!? My words.
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︎ Dec 05 2020
Tweety words of encouragement
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︎ Dec 09 2020
Someone from Southern France sent me an MS Word file with 200 pages.
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︎ Dec 17 2020
What's another word for a marine biologist?
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︎ Nov 10 2020
My teacher asked us to describe our breakfast in one word.
I told her it was surreal
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︎ Dec 17 2020
Iโm thinking of a word. Starts with P and doesnโt have an ending
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︎ Nov 21 2020
I invented a new word today
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︎ Nov 30 2020
My wife said, โWhy donโt you write a book instead of your stupid word play jokes?โ
I said, โThatโs.....a novel idea.โ
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︎ Jul 26 2020
What is an example of someone getting to eat up their words?
King Midas saying that this sandwich is gold.
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︎ Dec 25 2020
I learnt cuss words from my uncle's son
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︎ Nov 24 2020
Jokes with crappy three-word punchlines that rely on irony aren't funny
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︎ Nov 16 2020
Shout out to whoever made the word plethora.
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︎ Nov 28 2020
What's another word in a thesaurus for 'mother' ?
Can't say. Mum's the word.
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︎ Dec 05 2020
If I had to describe myself in three words, I'd have to say:
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︎ Nov 14 2020
What do you call a British guy when he has good manners, bad hygiene, and an affinity for word play?
PunGent
Tried posting in Dad jokes sub and I guess it was the wrong place for a triple pun.
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︎ Nov 15 2020
Some people say that "icy" is the easiest word in the English language to spell.
When I think about it, I see why.
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︎ Oct 14 2020
Whatโs the best pun you can come up with the word โpelicanโ ?
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︎ Nov 02 2020
I recently learnt the Welsh word for 'push' is 'lluq'.
I saw it written on a Glass Door.
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︎ Nov 12 2020
I asked my wife to describe me in 5 words. She said I'm mature, I'm moral, I'm pure, I'm polite and I'm perfect! Then she added that I also...
...had a fundamental lack of understanding about apostrophes and spaces...
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︎ May 14 2020
"Trousers" is a fancy words for pants
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︎ Nov 27 2020
Feeling excluded, my toddler asked me to stop spelling out words while he was around.
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︎ Nov 19 2020
I just found out that Aaargghhh is not a real word.
I canโt tell you how angry I am at this.
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︎ Nov 18 2020
What's the longest word in the english language?
It's "smiles", because there's a mile between the two "s"'s.
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︎ Dec 10 2020
My 4 year old son has been learning spanish all year and he still canโt say the word please.
Which i think is poor for four
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︎ Sep 15 2020
I invented a new word,
๐︎ 17
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︎ Nov 29 2020
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