Just cost me a $1 to put air in my tyre, when before it used to be free.
I guess, that's inflation.
You know, I had such a happy childhood. My dad used to put me in tyres and roll me down the hill.
Why aren’t depressed people worried about flat tyres?
They are always carrying despair.
Phoned my wife and said, "Unbelievable...on the way to the bowling alley my tyre went flat."
"Have you got a spare?" she questioned.
"Honey," I sighed, "I'm not at the bowling alley yet."
I got tired trying to think of a good posting title for this one.
When you roll in from a night out but you're tyred so you just sit down in the garden slumped against the wall
I used to work at a square tyre factory...
It was a real bumpy ride.
Did you see the documentary about car tyres?
It was a bit flat at the beggining, but it got wheely interesting.
Why did the bicycle go to sleep ?
Today, I saw a homeless man living in a tyre, so I punctured it
He's now living in a flat
A man has been stealing wheels off of police cars
Police are working tirelessly to catch him
Sometimes I get tyred of normal jokes and make puns instead. They are quick, easy, and don't put you under pressure. Sometimes, they can be very flat. They can be as light as air, or as heavy as steel. All in all, puns really punp me up!
What do you call a person who trades rubber tyres for a living?
I did a good deed today. I saw a homeless man living in a tyre and I punctured it...
How is that a good deed you ask?
Well now he lives in a flat!
One car Tyre speaking to another:
Tyre 1: How you feeling about the big trip tomorrow?
Tyre 2: I'm pumped.
What's the difference between a well dressed man on a bike and a poorly dressed man on a unicycle?
I had to blow up my the tyres on my car the other day...
I came home afterwards "Done it?" he said.
Me - "Yeah, bit of a piss take though, cost me 50p just for some air."
"Well, that's inflation for you."
Good one, Dad.
Son, I know you don't always love your job, but just be glad you are not in the tyre business.
.. you would never be able to retire.
Flat tyre
Dad just cracked this one out (for the millionth time) so I thought I would share the wealth!
Walking past a car I point out it has a flat tyre. Dad just turns and says "It's alright, it's only flat at the bottom."
From r/memes, thought it belonged here
Chase after a car you get exhausted
Run in front of a car you get tyred
What are Spock's tyres made out of?
Bicycle jokes won't impress you
But a unicycle one wheel.
Why can't a cycle stand on it's own?
Why couldn't the motorcycle stay up until midnight?
I wanted to go for a ride early morning.
But my bike didn't feel like it. It was two tyred.
What happened to the man who was chased by a car?
He Got Tyred.
PART 2:
Q) What happened to the man who chased a car?
A) He got exhausted
Why did the truck's wheels go flat?
I must have just turned into a bike...
Why was the bike lying down on the floor?
Because it was two-tyred.
Why was the muffler shop closed...? They were exhausted
My dad works at a petrol station
They have air pumps for you to fill up your tyres at the station. Dad works behind the counter.
Customer: "Excuse me, how much is the air?"
Dad looks shocked and covers up his hair with his hands.
Dad: "You're not having any!"
I had a happy childhood, my dad used to put me in a tyre and roll me down the hill...
I saw a homeless man living in a tyre, so I punctured it
I had a happy childhood. My dad would put me inside a tyre and then roll me down a hill.
Why did the bicycle fall over?
Because it was two tyred.
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