Because my Tommy hurt
Then IT hit me!
Tommy Tomato keeps falling behind, but if he tries to ketchup with all the relish he can mustard he just mayo succeed.
and at first he doesn't get it, don't worry.
Hilfiger it out.
That he changed his name from Tommy to Hugh
Makes sense.
We don’t talk about the elephant in “The Room.”
Hilfiger something out
Because that's his name.
Tommy, Hilfiger it out!
He's wrong, son. The fingers should be eaten separately.
.
Me: No, I said... “I’m giving up! Drinking for a month!”
It was Slipper When Wet
She mustup a perfectly good snack!
I'm not too sure, but Tommy, he'll figure it out.
I walked out of The Room more than once.
(Please don't kill me)
Because all of his students get Hi Marks.
He's got too much thyme on his hands.
They both started as a joke but ended up finding success by being ridiculously bad
He was too far out man. (Say this with a Tommy Chong voice when you do it)
Tommy Hilführer
Tommy hill-figure
Tommy proudly answered, "North, South and Tad!"
Little Joey asked his brother, "How many women can a man marry?"
"Sixteen." Tommy responded.
"How do you know that?"
"Easy." Tommy said. "All you have to do is add it up, like the priest said, 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer!"
My wife: "Honey after you get a vasectomy you have to go to regular check ups so we don't get a whoopsie daisey" Me: "Or a whoopsie Tommy or a whoopsie Bobby"
So I donated blood recently, and one of the Doctors(?) Nurses(?) for the Red-Cross named Tommy was a jokester. So I start donating and he is cracking all these jokes and at one point he gets to talking about his childhood. Tommy says, "When I was a kid I had a step-ladder." I asked him what was special about it afterwards and he said, "well I never met my real ladder, but this one did the job decently enough..."
Que groans from everyone at the donation center.
When we were on a family vacation years ago my sister's new boyfriend made a Collect call so he could talk to her. She comes running in the room gushing, "Tommy called me Collect!"
Dad says, "Pssh...Why would you waste your time on a guy that doesn't even know your name?"
