Detective Johnson and detective Smith were investigating a murder that occurred next to a playground. The only witnesses to the murder were four children, a brother age 3 and sister age 4, and a different brother (age 7) and sister (age 8).
The children all lived in a nearby apartment complex. The younger siblings lived in apartment 8D and the older ones lived in apartment 9D. Detective Johnson advised Detective Smith that she probably shouldn’t bother question 8D’s children about what they saw, since they’re too young to have a reliable memory. He believed that Smith would have a better chance of getting good information from the older children, since only 9D’s kids will remember.
I'm on the final step to becoming a Jamaican citizen...
get ready for the monsoon.
(Warning: Morbid dad joke) True Story -- My family were planning my mum's funeral. We always try to keep things light and try to stay positive, just as Mum would have it...
The funeral director was asking us what we think Mum should wear in her casket.
Mum always loved to wear sarongs (fabric wraps that go around the torso and drape downward a bit like a long skirt would), so my uncle suggested that she wear a sarong in there.
The funeral director looked a bit confused, as did some of our family members, to which my uncle added:
"What's sarong with that?"
I started laughing like an idiot. He was proud of it too. The funeral director was rather shocked. We assured her, and our more proper relatives, that Mum would've absolutely loved the joke (which is very true).
His delivery was perfect. I'll never forget the risk he took. We sometimes recall the moment as a way help cushion the blows of the grieving process.
--Edit--
I appreciate the condolences. I'm doing well and the worst is behind me and my family. But thanks :)
--Edit--
Massive thanks for all the awards and kind words. And the puns! Love 'em.
True story: I was a kid, watching TV in our living room. My dad was outside using the grill. All of a sudden he bursts in the door hopping on one foot yelling “I stepped on a Bee!”
I was so concerned I jumped up and ran over to him...
Earlier that day my friend and I who were really into mountain biking had been using really sticky letters to put our names on our bikes. We were working near the general area of the BBQ.
Apparently I had dropped one...
Stuck to the bottom of my dads foot was the letter B....
A legendary dad joke from a legendary dad.
What did the grape say when it got stepped on?
Nothing - but it let out a little whine
What is the first step in buying a dog?
You fill out a pupplication
Four for the price of one
What does the cell say when his sister steps on his toe?
My brother got extremely pissed off when he put the top on a pot of water upside down. Then he turned it over.
Thought of this while I was teaching my little brother about the wonderful world of colors
My footless brother stepped all over a freshly hatched anthill
Guess you could say he's lack-toes in toddler ants
What is the first step in making a solar system?
A lot of people say the me and my older brother look alike
I agree because I have his jeans
What is grey, has four legs, howls at the moon, and eats cement?
A wolf...
I just added the cement to make it hard.
Why didn't the Grandmaster in Ragnarok know who Thor's brother was?
Was the information being kept low-key?
My son's math's teacher was away so the head of school had to step in and take her place.
It's the principal that counts.
My brother kept bringing random stuff to the house so I told him to move in with his friends
It was hard for me but it was hoarder for them
what did the cell say when it’s sister stepped on it’s foot
My little brother just came up with this: Why was the fully loaded hot dog cold?
Because it was a chili dog.
My eldest wanted to know why I wouldn't lend him any of my tools, but I let his younger brother, the prodigal son, borrow whatever equipment he wants.
Simple, I said, the prodigal son returns...
I had an argument with my brother about how to get to the next floor in the mall because he refused to use the stairs or the elevator
My next thought was: "Well, that escalated quickly"
Apparently, the producers of The Flintstones were planning to make one final episode where Fred’s brother marries Barney’s brother.
It was cancelled because it was the 60s and Americans weren’t yet ready to have a gay old time.
I was walking past a field and saw a couple of guys stealing the steps off a fence.
A lady came up to me and said 'Aren't you going to stop them?'
I said 'No. That's not my stile.'
I got into a fight with my brother on the way to church today because he was positive that Jesus was an Intel processor guy....
When anybody with half a brain clearly knows he has a Ryzen
What would the Property Brothers show be called if they were alien skeletons?
I don’t really publicize the fact that I’m Thor’s brother.
Why did the clock go back four seconds?
My brother broke his arm at the aquarium
We had to fetch a sturgeon.
I am Buzz Aldrin. Second man to step on the moon.
Did you know Shakespeare had a brother who was a foot soldier in the military?
He would get so nervous before battle that he couldn't keep his hands from shaking. The say he wielded quite the shaky-spear.
Did you hear about the redneck who stepped in a bear trap at the hoedown?
I guess it was a real shindigger
When the Wright Brothers were arrested for trespassing at Kitty Hawk, the judge refused to grant them bail...
...he considered them a flight risk.
The Texas state Aquarium taught a crow to play connect four, too bad they didn't teach it Clue...
I bet it would murder the game.
My brother stumbled and fell down the stairs
It wasn't a pleasant trip.
My brother always takes the stairs, but I prefer taking the elevator.
I guess we are raised differently.
What did the friend say after his brother asked what will happen after he gets his glasses?
What does Thomas the Tank Engine call his teen brother?
What did the cell say when his sister stepped on his toe?
When I found out a coworker has four step kids and one biological kid, I said "Hats off to you" . . . .
He replied, "No. Hats on. Hats on now."
What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?
Nothing. It just let out a little whine.
The grape didn't say much when he got stepped on.
He just let out a little wine.
What did the cell say when his sister stepped on his foot?
What did the cell say when it’s sister stepped on it’s foot
My brother broke his arm at the aquarium
We had to fetch a sturgeon.
I am Buzz Aldrin. Second man to step on the moon
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