What’s the opposite of Christopher Reeves

Christopher Walken

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Icemanwc
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2022
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What does Christopher Walken say when someone bumps into him on the street?

Hey, I'm Walken here!

P.S. Bonus points for doing the voice too.

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πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2022
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Christopher Lloyd is joining the Star Wars universe!

The ManDeLorean.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KnowledgeOfMuir
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2022
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I heard that 23% of the crew of Christopher Columbus' Santa Maria were named Juan

Which means there was a three to Juan ratio

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KalNymeri
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2021
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β€œChristopher Wreath” is back on my door and now the holidays can begin!
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thegeekofsteel
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
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When did Christopher Columbus arrive in the USA?

On Columbus day

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Transitionals
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2021
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So I just got back from watching the new Christopher Nolan movie. Here's my short review..

Tenet of ten.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Digitek50
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2020
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Why did Christopher Columbus pull a bunch of Swiss chard out of the ocean?

He wanted to be in uncharded waters.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gecko_echo
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2020
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A duck walks into a drug store

He asks the clerk for some lip ointment.

Clerk " certainly sir, will that be cash or credit"

The duck says "put it on my bill"

From blast from the past, Christopher Walken

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ouie
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13 2022
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What did Christopher Columbus tell his men before they got on the ship?

Men, get on the ship.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PuzzledSkate
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2019
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Why did Christopher Robin spend so long in the toilet?

He was playing with Pooh.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pensquee
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2018
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What animal was Christopher Columbus the most afraid of?

A Navi-Gator

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jakewilson801
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2018
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Christopher Walken got arrested in The 100 Acre Woods

He was convicted of stealing Kanga's pouch and had to change his name to Christopher Robben.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Soggy_Pronoun
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2018
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Why was Christopher Columbus drunk on his trip to the Americas?

He was quartered on the port side.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/orangeyf3
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2018
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More than 1 000 pieces of music by Johann Sebastian Bach have been preserved,

along with nearly 900 by Carl Philipp Emanuel Bach, nearly 400 by Johann Christian Bach, more than 300 by Johann Christoph Friedrich Bach, and nearly 200 by Wilhelm Friedemann Bach.

Together with as many as 200 more surviving compositions by other members of the Bach dynasty, scholars estimate that about 3 000 works are preserved in total, a collection that we today know as the Baroque Bach mountain.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MetaEd
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2021
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Nolan!

Christopher Nolan's new and highly anticipated movie will be released on December 15 in blu-ray. Finally I can watch the movie at Tenet-p.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Saddam78610
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2020
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A joke I came up with when I was waking up this morning.

Two guys were walking down the street towards one another, the second guy bumps into the first guy and the first guy goes "Ayee, watch it. I'm Walken 'ere" and the second guy goes "oh, sorry Christopher"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ninjalord25
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2020
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Pearl Harbor of puns

If your onion sang hip-hop, would that be a rapscallion?

I used to be an astronaut, but I got tired of eating out of satellite dishes. I wasn't allowed to eat the Milky Way, even though I had to look at it every day. The worst thing was, I never got to visit The Space Bar. Then, when I was visiting the dark side of the moon, I was bitten by a parasite. Now, you might think it's crazy, but the doctor who removed it called it a lunar-tick.

If "womb" is pronounced "woom" and "tomb" is pronounced "toom", shouldn't "bomb" be pronounced "boom"?

China recently tested a new steroid. It basically turns you into The Hulk. The side effect is it could turn you into a crazed zombie that tends to rip the upper extremities from people. People are saying that this could be the zombie apocalypse. In my opinion, lips have nothing to do with it. I call it ARMageddon. The only way to stay safe now is to not let anyone close enough to disarm you.

I recently was going to join the railroad union. I decided against it because it's complicated. If I received instruction on driving the locomotive, would they call it engineering, or training?

I got a sad story about a flower. I don't know who the heck she pissed off, but damn, now she's a Black-Eyed Susan.

I finally figured out what makes leaves angry. Fall. They get so mad they change color. Some are yellow. They're just afraid and run from their problems. The other ones usually just leave.

I went parachuting with my military buddies once. We landed on a department store. I told him I think we're at the wrong coordinates. He said: "Nope. We're right on Target"

I asked a psychologist if Native Americans have strong emotions. He said "Oh yeah, they're intense".

If a psychotic person thought something made sense, would that thought be psychological?

If Matt Damon were searching for a secondhand store, would he be Goodwill Hunting?

My friend is a Marksman for the military. One day, he went to the armory and asked for 3 snipers. They gave him a candy bar. It was a 3 Musketeers.

I want to be there if Dwayne Johnson ever uses a pizza stone. That way I can smell what "The Rock" is cookin'.

Christopher bought a lemon, and the car broke down. Now Christopher Walken.

Have you heard about the latest bank battle on Wall Street? Capital One and Chase got in a fight and Capital One.

You know what a pirate says to his wenches when he sees the shoreline? "LAND HO!"

A man finds a lamp in the desert and dusts it off. Poof! A genie p

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PraetorSolaris
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2019
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stared at dad with a straight face for 5min when he got me with this

We're all sat watching a film with Christopher Plummer

Me: Is that Christopher Plummer?

Dad: No , it's Christopher the electrician.

cue exceptionally unimpressed look from me

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mmhmmhoneybee
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2016
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What is the opposite of Christopher Reeve?

Christopher Walken

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2022
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What the difference between Christopher Lloyd and Christopher Reeve?

Christopher Walken

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πŸ‘€︎ u/realswagmb
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2021
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What's the difference between Christopher Reeve and Christopher Walken?

One is Walken the other one isn't

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2020
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