Two rich dudes were hanging out in a bar. One said to the other, "Hey, you wanna come to my square island?"

The other responded "Four shore!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RedBluemann
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2020
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What happens when two squares get angry with each other?

They square up

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πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2019
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Scared af
πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bongnazi
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2020
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I have a math joke

But I’m 2^2 to say it

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spacemann7
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2020
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Why didn't 4 jump into the pool?

Because they were 2^2

πŸ‘︎ 108
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πŸ‘€︎ u/f_tothe_p
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2019
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Betting on the man jumping off a ledge

Two clowns were watching the late evening news. The current news story was about a man up on a ledge and threatening to jump. The station then cut to a commercial.

The first clown said, β€œI bet you $20 he’s going to jump.”

The second clown repliedΒ  β€œOkay, it’s a bet!”

(Back to newscast.) The man jumped.

The second clown, being a good sport, pulled out a twenty dollar bill and handed it to the other clown. β€œOkay. Here’s my $20.”

However, the first clown refused, saying β€œNo, I can’t take it.”

The second clown replied, β€œI insist. I lost the bet fair and square.”

The first clown said, β€œI have a confession to make. I saw the same thing on the 6:00 news and knew he jumped. So it wasn’t really a fair bet.”

But the second clown replied, β€œI know. I saw the same newscast. But I didn’t think he would be stupid enough to jump twice!”

http://bestcleanfunnyjokes.com/betting-on-the-man-jumping-off-a-ledge/

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tfraymond
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2019
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Why did the number 4 not get into the club?

Because he’s two squared!

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kb1103
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2019
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'Wanna hear something dodgy?' asked my girlfriend with an air of uncertainty.

I said, 'Sure.'

She sighed.

'I saw you and your ex studying Pythagoras' theorem in the library.'

'Oh, you did?' I asked.

She paused. 'So, how do you explain that?'

'Easily,' I replied. 'It's when the square on the hypotenuse of a right-angled triangle is equal to the sum of the squares on the other two sides.'

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2019
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Two Farms

There was two farms next to each other, separated by a long fence. The two farmers were called nick and Barry. They were both very resourceful farmers, using each and every square inch of land to grow on. Both would tend to their crops twice a day every single day, and became friends. However, both farmers were penny pinchers, and would often try and take a few extra crops from the other side of the fence, which lead to arguments. One day, Barry came out to tend his crops, but nick did not appear once. This continued for several days. Both sets of crops continued to grow, along and up the fence, eventually intertwining. Both farmers were growing wheat. After around 5 days, Barry came out and to his delight, saw nick tending to his harvest. However, this delight soon changed to frustration as he saw nick taking extra crops from his side. "Where have you been, and what do you think you're doing?" He exclaimed. "I'm taking in my wheat, and I haven't been out for a few days due to illness. I've been feeling queasy and dizzy when I stand up, with a throbbing pain in my head each time. But it's ok, they're only headaches." "Oh I don't think so mister" said Barry.

"Those are my grains!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/harryjrogers20
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2019
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Minor joke

In the car with my brother and parents, heading out to a restaurant. Brother brings up a ski trip we're going on...

Brother: "I'm probably going to take it easy for the first day or two. Ski a couple blue squares, just do some minor things-"

Dad: "Dig for gold?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/xMrChuckles
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2014
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Hitler's Doughnut, Original joke

One day during the middle of World War II Hitler woke up craving a doughnut. He called for one of his soldiers to go retrieve him one. The soldier left before realizing Hitler never told him what kind of doughnut. Not wanting to go back and ask and be punished for taking too long the soldier got a jelly filled and went back. Upon seeing the doughnut, Hitler withdrew his pistol and shot the soldier square in the chest then called in his guards to clean up the body, and sent another soldier off to get a doughnut. Not wanting to be shot like his predecessor, the second soldier got a dozen in a variety and went back. Hitler looked over the box and again withdrew his pistol and shot the soldier. He called in a third soldier and sent him to complete the job the other two had failed. Soon enough, the third soldier had made it there and back. He timidly walked Into Hitlers room and presented him a single doughnut. Hitler looked at it and said "Finally, white powdered!"

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Oriyagi
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2014
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