Have you heard the Lego store is open for the first time since the COVID shutdown?

They're lining up for blocks.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nectar23
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Son was getting frustrated about the pandemic shutdown

Son : β€œWe need the opposite of shut down! Dad, what’s the opposite of shut down?”

Dad : β€œShut up!”

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/profusly
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2020
🚨︎ report
My son went to a good school before the shutdown.

But now his school is virtually the best.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/1manmob
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Many people protested the shutdown.

But soon, the resistance died out.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ILikePiezez
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Good to seen the US government back to work today after the shutdown...

They've been away all year.

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Government shutdown?

Obama's individual man-date threatened by a non-functioning Boehner.

πŸ‘︎ 56
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πŸ‘€︎ u/antipopular
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2013
🚨︎ report
Is Michael Giacchino the greatest Star Trek Dad Joker in the world?

He must have it in his Genes.

But seriously check out his Star Trek track listings. The guy loves a good pun.

Star Trek

  1. Star Trek

  2. Nailin' The Kelvin

  3. Labor Of Love

  4. Hella Bar Talk

  5. Enterprising Young Men

  6. Nero Sighted

  7. Nice To Meld You

  8. Run And Shoot Offense

  9. Does It Still McFly?

  10. Nero Death Experience

  11. Nero Fiddles, Narada Burns

  12. Back From Black

  13. That New Car Smell

  14. To Boldly Go

  15. End Credits

Star Trek Into Darkness

  1. Logos / Pranking The Natives

  2. Spock Drops, Kirk Jumps

  3. Sub Prime Directive

  4. London Calling

  5. Meld-Merized

  6. The Kronos Wartet

  7. Brigadoom

  8. Ship To Ship

  9. Earthbound And Down

  10. Warp Core Values

  11. Buying The Space Farm

  12. The San Fran Hustle

  13. Kirk Enterprises

  14. Star Trek Main Theme

Star Trek Beyond

  1. Logo and Prosper

  2. Thank Your Lucky Star Date

  3. Night on the Yorktown

  4. The Dance of the Nebula

  5. A Swarm Reception

  6. Hitting the Saucer a Little Hard

  7. Jaylah Damage

  8. In Artifacts as in Life

  9. Franklin, My Dear

  10. A Lesson in Vulcan Mineralogy

  11. MotorCycles of Relief

  12. Mocking Jaylah

  13. Crash Decisions

  14. Krall-y Krall-y Oxen Free

  15. Shutdown Happens

  16. Cater-Krall in Zero G

  17. Par-tay for the Course

  18. Star Trek Main Theme

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thegeneral400
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2018
🚨︎ report
My 87 year old grandpa has still got it

We were talking about the government shutdown when he said....

"Well congress tried to move the bill through the house but they couldn't budget."

πŸ‘︎ 81
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πŸ‘€︎ u/joeltrane
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2013
🚨︎ report
Mom Joke

My mom and I are working at a mill shutdown as safety watch while the roughnecks do maintenence on the mill.

The job situation is pretty variable, and you can get assigned to safety watch just about anything. I got picked for elevator detail.

I was talking to my mom and some other co workers at break, and someone asked me how elevator duty was. My mom chipped in with

"It had its ups and downs."

And then she said it all day long.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Froggy_hop
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2013
🚨︎ report
Out with my grandfatherly coworker for a beer

The last day of work before the holiday shutdown, an older coworker and me went out for a beer after work. The waitress brought us out bottles and asked "Would you like glasses?" to which he pulled out his safety glasses and said "No, we're covered."
She looked at him, shook her head and walked away.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HappyTheBunny
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2014
🚨︎ report

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