Robert Fleck Puns

I’m a bit of a noob to jazz, and am really enjoying the greats/classics (love supreme, kind of blue, brilliant corners, etc). A few weeks ago, I downloaded Béla Fleck and the Marcus Roberts Trio. I love this album, and I listen to it almost every day. What are your thoughts on this album/artists. Anyone have any recommended similar listens?

Hi guys. I heard Flecky is now a teaching assistant at a special needs school. Has he got no money left, or is he doing this as a vocation thing?

So in a Storm of Swords, Joffrey lays into Tywin pretty hard during a small council meeting.

>"Be quiet, Cersei. Joffrey, when your enemies defy you, you must serve them steel and fire. When they go to their knees, however, you must help them back to their feet. Elsewise no man will ever bend the knee to you. And any man who must say 'I am the king' is no true king at all. Aerys never understood that, but you will. When I've won your war for you, we will restore the king's peace and the king's justice. The only head that need concern you is Margaery Tyrell's maidenhead."
>
>Joffrey had that sullen, sulky look he got. Cersei had him firmly by the shoulder, but perhaps she should have had him by the throat. The boy surprised them all. Instead of scuttling safely back under his rock, Joff drew himself up defiantly and said, "You talk about Aerys, Grandfather, but you were scared of him."
>
>Oh, my, hasn't this gotten interesting? Tyrion thought.
>
>Lord Tywin studied his grandchild in silence, gold flecks shining in his pale green eyes. "Joffrey, apologize to your grandfather," said Cersei.
>
>He wrenched free of her. "Why should I? Everyone knows it's true. My father won all the battles. He killed Prince Rhaegar and took the crown, while your father was hiding under Casterly Rock." The boy gave his grandfather a defiant look. "A strong king acts boldly, he doesn't just talk."
>
>"Thank you for that wisdom, Your Grace," Lord Tywin said, with a courtesy so cold it was like to freeze their ears off. "Ser Kevan, I can see the king is tired. Please see him safely back to his bedchamber. Pycelle, perhaps some gentle potion to help His Grace sleep restfully?" Tyrion VI ASOS.

After the dust settles from that, Tyrion and Tywin speak alone.

>"Not Robert the Second," Tyrion said. "Aerys the Third."
>
>"The boy is thirteen. There is time yet." Lord Tywin paced to the window. That was unlike him; he was more upset than he wished to show. "He requires a sharp lesson."
>
>Tyrion had gotten his own sharp lesson at thirteen. He felt almost sorry for his nephew. On the other hand, no one deserved it more. "Enough of Joffrey," he said. "Wars are won with quills and ravens, wasn't that what you said? I must congratulate you. How long have you and Walder Frey been plotting this?"
>
>"I mislike that word," Lord Tywin said stiffly. Id.

Two Tyrion POVs later, Joffrey dies--most likely from

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

Do your worst!

This is a common misconception I see some people make that I want to clear up: Just because a character has a sympathetic backstory or motivation does not make them a sympathetic character. A character becomes sympathetic or non-sympathetic based off the choices they make.

Take, for example, the most relatable hero character of all-time, Spider-Man. His backstory could easily be used as the basis for a villain origin story. He initially uses his powers for selfish reasons and takes no action when a robbery happens. This indirectly causes his uncle to get killed. That alone could be enough to send him on the path to villainy, but instead it motivates him to be a hero and always do the right thing. That is what makes Spider-Man sympathetic.

Some of cinema's most famous villains have sympathetic reasons for the things they do. Anakin Skywalker loses his mother and isn't allowed to get attached to people. Arthur Fleck/ Joker has had an absolutely miserable life, abandoned by his birth parents and humiliated by his idol. William Foster from Falling Down lost his job and went through a divorce separating him from his daughter. Thanos wants to save the universe from the same fate his homeworld suffered. Walter White wants to ensure his family is financially stable after he dies of cancer.

We empathize with these characters. We understand why they are doing what they're doing. We do NOT sympathize with these characters. We don't agree with HOW they're doing what they're doing. Their choice of action to achieve their goals is unethical and unrelatable. (read Robert McKee's Story for more on difference between sympathy and empathy).

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"

Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

PART FIVE HUNDRED AND FIFTY-THREE

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Saturday

“Shit,” Nuncio swore, yanking his feet out of his son’s nest and launching himself to his feet, thrusting his chair back at the same time. He could intercept any phone call he desired, and the closer they were to his location, the faster he could do it.

When Sam’s panicked call went out on the other side of this very wing, followed momentarily by several rushed calls to the rest of his immediate family, it took everything he had not to bellow in disbelief himself.

Thrall withdrawal! What the fuck were you thinking, Llyr?!

Vadim squirmed at his sudden departure but settled quickly enough when Nuncio slid the prosthetic legs that he’d created to replicate his own from the knee down, including heat, pulse and texture. He also turned on the camera that he had under the table so he could watch his son for the few minutes he’d be gone, all the while wondering why the hell Sam and Llyr’s true gryps guards hadn’t made an appearance.

Not that it mattered. This was the Prydelands. If they didn’t want to do their damn job, Nuncio knew of plenty of pryde members who would help pin the cantankerous ocean lord to his bed. Most would volunteer.

He was just about to step away when his aunt’s voice drifted through his thoughts. Leave them be, Nuncio.

He whirled to stare at the door, though in truth she could be anywhere having this conversation with him. Why? They need help!

They need to heal as a family more.

Nuncio processed her words, churning them over with his innate until he relaxed with a delighted chuckle. You sneaky so-and-so, Auntie Col.

* * *

“I thought I might find you up here,” Charlie said, as the elevator opened on the ninth floor to reveal Brock sitting on the floor with his back against the d

But that’s comparing apples to oranges

And boy are my arms legs.

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

BamBOO!

They’re on standbi

A play on words.

I am relatively new to baseball. Though my family dating back through both sets of grandparents have been lifelong Reds fans, I didn't start paying attention with any degree of regularity until 2019.

I have seen a number of baseball films throughout my life (mostly narrative features), but was wondering if any veteran fans could point me in the direction of some documentaries and any long-form non-fiction (books and docuseries) to consume during the off-season. If you could post recommendations below, I would like to compile a list of titles that other users may be interested in pursuing, as well.

Because I've always been a cinephile, I will start with some of the better narrative features that I have seen and can vouch for. Feel free to suggest ones that I may have missed. And if you have any recommendations for documentaries, docuseries, or books, I will make lists for those.

Narrative Features

• The Pride of the Yankees (1942); dir. Sam Wood.

• Angels in the Outfield (1951); dir. Clarence Brown.

• I Will Buy You (1956); dir. Masaki Kobayashi.

• Damn Yankees (1958); dir. George Abbott & Stanley Donen

• Bang the Drum Slowly (1973); dir. John D. Hancock.

• The Bad News Bears (1976); dir. Michael Ritchie.

• The Natural (1984); dir. Barry Levinson.

• Bull Durham (1988); dir. Ron Shelton.

• Eight Men Out (1988); dir. John Sayles.

• Field of Dreams (1989); dir. Phil Alden Robinson

• Major League (1989); dir. David S. Ward.

• Mr. Baseball (1992); dir. Fred Schepisi.

• A League of Their Own (1993); dir. Penny Marshall.

• The Sandlot (1993); dir. David Mickey Evans.

• Angels in the Outfield (1994); dir. William Dear.

• For Love of the Game (1998); dir. Sam Raimi.

• 61* (2001); dir. Billy Crystal.

• Sugar (2008); dir. Ryan Fleck & Anna Boden.

• Moneyball (2011); dir. Bennett Miller.

• Trouble with the Curve (2012); dir. Robert Lorenz.

• 42 (2013); dir. Brian Helgeland.

Documentary Features

• Ballplayer: Pelotero (2011); dir. Ross Finkel & Trevor Martin & Jon Paley.

• The Battered Bastards of Baseball (2014); dir. Chapman Way & Maclain Way.

Documentary Series

• Baseball (1994); pro. Ken Burns.

• Baseball's Golden Age (2008); pro. Steven Sterns.

Literature (Non-Fiction)

• Eight Men Out (1963); auth. Eliot Asinof.

• The Glory of their Times (1966); ed. Lawrence Ritter.

• Ball Four (1970); auth. Jim Bouton.

• Only the Ball Was White (19