To the person who stole my Microsoft Office license.
I'm gonna find you. You have my word.
What did the tomato say to the person who was about to eat him?
I hate you from my head to-ma-toes.
Warning...."To the person who stole my glasses....."
"I'll find you....I have contacts."
Person to my dad “How long have you been married?”
Dad: “10 of the happiest years of my life”
(They’ve been married 43 years)
Kinder Person Award goes to...
What does a person who fakes injuries like to drink?
What does a dead person do to lose weight?
What does a person with Covid like to drink?
For my birthday in mid-January, I invited a few friends over to a highly populated urban residential area consisting mostly of closely packed, decrepit housing units inhabited primarily by impoverished persons.
It's my first slum-brrrr party so wish us luck!
According to ancient Japanese lore, the colour of a person’s aura changes when they die.
What do you say to the person getting breast reduction procedure?
I hope it takes the weight off your chest.
I used to be a people's person..
...but people ruined it for me.
I wanted to tell a joke about a dumb person who ran
But that'd just be random
I'm Buzz Aldrin, second person ever to step on the moon.....
To the person that invented the number 0
My boss told me that he was going to fire the person with the worst posture
I have a hunch, it might be me.
The person who had once kidnapped me got released after serving 10 years in prison. Since then, I secretly follow him to his house every single day without his knowledge.
I guess I'm suffering from 'stalk home' syndrome.
Who is the best person at the golf course to get to make coffee?
At a conference there was the most courageous person who went by the name Sam. Before he got on the stage to deliver his impressive speech, all attendees begged him not to sing.
I went back in time to kill the person that made bread.
Now he yeasts to exist.
One I came up with myself
Next month, I’m going to fulfill my lifelong dream of seeing The Golden Gate in San Francisco in person.
My wife said, “What are you going to do when you finally see it?”
Me: I’ll cross that bridge when I get there.
To the person who stole my antidepressants-
I hope you are happy now.
To the person who took my iPhone off the dinner table, when I was distracted.
I hope you face time soon.
I used to be blind but I cured it. My wife was the first person I saw
It was love at first sight.
What do you say if you find a person trying to poison someone with celiacs disease
I’ve caught you bread handed
Told my wife to message the lawn person
Because we are taking our fence down.
She came back, stopped me, just to ask "Is there a mower emoji?
I said: is that really an emojency?
38, first original joke from an unoriginal dad. Had to share.
There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh.
To the person that stole my broken bathroom scale...
... You won’t get a weigh with this!
To the person in the wheelchair that stole my camo jacket.
You can hide, but you can't run.
China just found the first person to get coronavirus
To person who invented infinity
What do you call a jewish person who is too young to be considered an adult
Jeff Bezos, the founder of Amazon, has become the first person ever to have a net worth over $200 billion.
What does a blind person take to look stronger?
I like to think the person who invented the umbrella called it brella.
I used to be in a relationship with a person who made edible stickers for a living.
We had to part ways though, they were getting too clingy for my tastes.
What did the egg say to the person
why did the short person ignore the you must be this tall to ride sign
To the person who stole my Microsoft Office key.
Im gonna find you. You have my word.
To the person who stole my spectacles. I will find you.
To the person who invented 0...
To the person who stole my Microsoft office licence ,I will find you
To the person that stole my copy of Microsoft Office
I will find you, you have my Word
To the person who stole my glasses, I will find you.
To the person who stole my Microsoft Office
I will find you, you have my Word!
To the person whole stole my Microsoft Office
I will find you, you have my Word
To the person that stole my antidepressants...
To the person who stole my glasses:i will find you
To the person who stole my glasses
I will find you, I have contacts
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