My Ship Puns

A list of puns related to "My Ship"

I want to quit my job of loading and unloading ship containers for two reasons

  1. My boss harbours some kinda grudge against me.

  2. He docks my pay because of it. Not to mention the constant pier pressure from my colleagues to nick things from the containers

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👤︎ u/jeevesfan
📅︎ Jul 25 2022
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I wanted to tell my children a story about a ship that brings cars from one side of the river to the other

But then I noticed that they're too old for ferry tales.

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👤︎ u/notBjoern
📅︎ Feb 05 2022
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I feel so bad for crashing my ship into the Jolly Roger.

But I'm glad it's captain let me off the hook.

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👤︎ u/Prodigal_Knight2
📅︎ Feb 07 2022
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A guy starts working at a submarine. In the first day he works as a cleaner, then helps at the kitchen. Next day he runs the ship. In the evening he’s absolutely exhausted so he asks his friend “Why I have to change my position every time?”

He replies “I know, this sub is full of reposts”

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👤︎ u/amicus_of_the_world
📅︎ Aug 10 2019
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We know the Panama has had its problems, and the Suez had that ship stuck recently, but my co-worker must know of another problematic waterway. Every day he yells out...

‘Far Canal. I hate this place’.

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👤︎ u/AndrewMacSydney
📅︎ Mar 29 2021
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Man: I’m so sorry I’m late for my ship cleaning job. What are my responsibilities?

Boss: You mist the boat.

👍︎ 12
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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Nov 27 2020
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I've started a ship building business out of my garage.

Sails have gone through the roof

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👤︎ u/howeynick
📅︎ Sep 02 2018
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I'm a sea captain, my crew was goofing off at the back of the ship...

... I had to give them a stern warning.

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👤︎ u/ImOnlyHereFor3DPrint
📅︎ Apr 04 2020
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My town finally decided to tear down the dilapidated replica of a pirate ship...

It was an aye-sore.

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Jan 12 2020
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My friend has been having the hardest time getting pool noodles air frieighted in. Last night, he said he's going to have them sent on a container ship...

I said, "whatever boats your float."

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Nov 20 2019
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I made my own golf balls. They were supposed to ship in 2 weeks but ended up coming early!
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👤︎ u/champ2150
📅︎ Aug 12 2017
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My ship was sailing North but then it suddenly veered West and hit another ship...

It was an occident, I swear!

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👤︎ u/gssn-nospace
📅︎ Nov 29 2019
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My friend met the love of his life when the were both vomiting overboard after a rhinovirus hit their cruise ship...

It was a match made in heaving!

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Apr 06 2019
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I’ve installed podiums and microphones all over my ship.

They’re just for deck oration.

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👤︎ u/procrastiprov
📅︎ Dec 28 2018
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I forgot to ship out my brother's homemade beef jerky and accidentally ate it instead.

It was a missed steak. Honest.

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👤︎ u/KhAiMeLioN
📅︎ Feb 19 2019
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My kid asked why I named our wifi ”ship”

But that’s how everything syncs

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👤︎ u/stunningdedication
📅︎ Jan 15 2019
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My first job was on a ship, I was assigned to look for navigational markers. I was a Buoy Scout.
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👤︎ u/DinglebarryHandpump
📅︎ Dec 08 2018
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The mailman refused to ship my Girl Scout cookies because I put up too many Dad Jokes.

Jokes on him though. I'm just gonna post Samoa.

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👤︎ u/JohnnyHammerstix
📅︎ Feb 14 2019
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My co-worker wondered out loud why the super nice prison inmates that run our print ship are in jail.

I said, "maybe they killed someone with kindness!"

👍︎ 8
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👤︎ u/JonnyLawless
📅︎ Mar 19 2015
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I started a ship building business in my attic

Sails are going through the roof!

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👤︎ u/SimonDanziger
📅︎ May 11 2019
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