Malign Puns

I was visibly panicking, but I lost it when he said it’s “All in your head.”

When the tests came back he said: "There be nine." Never trust a doctor who illegally downloaded his degree.

My wife who usually stops talking to me for an hour or so when I make a good dad joke got me today...

Wife: What's our gate?

Me: B9

Wife: No, it's malignant.

Me: ...

Everytime B-9 comes up, he says:

"B-9... not malignant."

-____-

For some reason my entire family plays bingo every year on Christmas. And every time my dad draws and reads all the number-letter combos. And every year he waits patiently until he can say his favorite dad joke: Oh, thank goodness it's not malignant... (pause for emphasis) It's B9!