I was absolutely livid at my doctor. He said I had a brain tumour that wasn’t malignant, whatever the hell that meant.

I was visibly panicking, but I lost it when he said it’s β€œAll in your head.”

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/neloc1
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2019
🚨︎ report
I heard that moles could be malignant so I asked my doctor about my two...

When the tests came back he said: "There be nine." Never trust a doctor who illegally downloaded his degree.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TowerSheep
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2018
🚨︎ report
My wife got me at the airport earlier today...

My wife who usually stops talking to me for an hour or so when I make a good dad joke got me today...

Wife: What's our gate?

Me: B9

Wife: No, it's malignant.

Me: ...

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2014
🚨︎ report
I was playing Bingo with my girlfriend's family for Christmas Eve, and her dad always announces the numbers

Everytime B-9 comes up, he says:

"B-9... not malignant."

-____-

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KnightsOfTheNight
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2014
🚨︎ report
Bingo!

For some reason my entire family plays bingo every year on Christmas. And every time my dad draws and reads all the number-letter combos. And every year he waits patiently until he can say his favorite dad joke: Oh, thank goodness it's not malignant... (pause for emphasis) It's B9!

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tsatugi
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2014
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.