Father of six hereโฆ my kids love dad jokes at the dinner table. Mom is less enthusiastic. Today, my eleven year old decided to get in on the action: โwhat are twins favorite fruits?โ
Pearsโฆ And then he proceeded to fall out of his chair laughing. Meanwhile mom wants to know how she couldโve tested for this before getting in too deep.
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︎ Oct 30 2021
I love this one. It is absolutely good
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︎ Nov 19 2021
Love is blind (wait for itโฆ)
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︎ Oct 01 2021
Love is like a fart
If you have to force it it's probably crap
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︎ Oct 18 2021
Falling in love is dangerous.
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︎ Apr 19 2021
The four seasons were arguing about which of them was the best. Winter boasts, "Well, you can build snowmen and the snow is so beautiful. And Christmas!! Everyone loves Christmas!"
Spring laughs, "Well sure, but come springtime, everything is so fresh and new! All the new flowers, it can't get much better than that!"
Summer rays, "Yes, but I am undoubtedly the overall best season! Girls in bikinis, ice cream, nice weather. You can't top that. What about you autumn, what do you have to offer?"
Autumn leaves
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︎ Aug 23 2021
My wife is a sniper but I know she loves me, you know how I know?
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︎ Jul 29 2021
Bet Jay Z loves a 99. (Rest of world buddies, a 99 is the name of the best UK ice cream, not what you're thinking). (UK people, it is the best)
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︎ Jul 03 2021
Dad: Son, your love of Korean music is tearing this family apart.
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︎ Jun 22 2021
What can you do for a tortoise that was falling in love but now is only falling apart?
Nothing you can do, itโs a turtle eclipse of the heart
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︎ May 20 2021
I love GOLD , but *A* is silent in it!#chem punsฦช(หโฃห)สโ(โ
๏ฝโ)โ
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︎ Dec 26 2020
โI love my job!โ exclaimed the farmer. โAll you do is boss me around all day!โ complained one of his sheep. โWhat did you say?โ challenged the farmer. The sheep glared back and growled...
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︎ Oct 25 2020
My love for my wife is like the national debt.
It's enormous. It seems likes it's been around forever. It is growing every day. It's something that will be passed onto our children and grandchildren.
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︎ Feb 14 2021
I love puns, butt this is getting outta control
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︎ Dec 04 2020
I heard Bill Gates is really unsure if he'll ever find love again. But as the old saying goes...
thereโs plenty more Phish in the (C:)
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︎ May 05 2021
This is a great sub to discover because I love telling Dad jokes.
Sometimes he even laughs.
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︎ Jul 17 2020
The longest I've ever made love for is 1 hour, 2 minutes and 32 seconds...
... I love it when the clocks go forward!
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︎ Nov 19 2020
So this happened today... this is why I love Reddit.
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︎ Dec 15 2020
This is why I love Reddit!
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︎ Sep 12 2020
My mate told me he is in love with two school bags
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︎ Apr 11 2021
I just love when food is packed with more food
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︎ Mar 19 2021
I was having a glass of wine with my wife after a long day and I heard her say "I love you so much and always look forward to being with you at the end of the day. I don't know what I'd do without you." "Is that you or the wine talking?" I asked. She replied "It's me...
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︎ Feb 11 2021
My neighbor is an epileptic midget who really loves pizza.
Seems like everyday heโs having little seizures.
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︎ Oct 23 2020
How do you know if your love interest is into you?
Invite them to the gym. If they show up...
โฆ
...then you know you're working out.
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︎ Dec 08 2020
Love is like peeing your pants...
... Everyone can see it, but only you can feel the warmth.
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︎ Sep 21 2020
There is one place in this world where you can truly love yourself.
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︎ Nov 18 2020
who is a Disney character and loves puns?
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︎ Mar 25 2020
Ordis from Warframe is just pure love
Everything in Ordis, Operator? Is that a pun?! Hmm.... I will attempt to bypass this fault.
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︎ Jul 11 2020
If god is love, and love is blind
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︎ Jun 23 2020
What is a seafood an Italian would love to have?
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︎ Oct 13 2020
Some people love cats, other people hate them. The pope is obsessed with them....
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︎ Jul 20 2020
Love it or hate it. This is a good pun
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︎ Oct 09 2019
Tinder match is basically love at first site ๐ฎ
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︎ Jul 13 2019
Love is in the air.
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︎ Sep 27 2017
The love for Brie cheese is real.
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︎ Sep 03 2019
Love is in the pairโฅ๏ธ
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︎ Feb 25 2020
This is why I love Reddit
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︎ Aug 10 2019
As much as I love Netflix, when I look at the presidents, I don't think orange is the new black.
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︎ Jun 23 2018
I asked my SO if she knew my favorite letter. She said "No, what is it?" I said "It's u." She responded "aww I love youuuuuuuu" To which I replied...
"I love u too. It's my favorite letter."
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︎ Apr 29 2020
If someone who loves books is a bookworm, does that make someone who loves audio books a tapeworm?
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︎ Sep 22 2019
Love is like a fart
If you have to force it, its probably just crap anyways.
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︎ Jun 22 2021
Love is like a fart
If you have to force it, itโs probably just gonna be crappy anyways
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︎ Feb 15 2021
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