Lighters Up Puns

all they had was 15,809 matches

...then looked at me and said "I'm packing heat"

It is now the lightest.

But all I got was ten thousand matches.

Then you'll have a match.

Google is useless- I tried searching up lighters, but it just gave me 13,756,072 matches.

Explanation- Matches refers to a substitute for a lighter, but also to the search results that Google provides :)

He's someone who has been very creative in his ways when he delivers his jokes to his victims, I'm a bit ashamed I didn't see this one coming

He called me on the phone, saying he needed help with doing something, sounding fairly serious on phone. He said "soljakwinever I need your help with something on amazon. I keep searching for lighters and it's not working right. Can you open it on your phone for me" Recently he's been asking me for help with some computer stuff, I built it for him lately and it's got nothing problems, blue screens over stuff, he's very smart but I wouldn't say he's anywhere near 'tech-literate'. But his is getting issues like I've never seen. So I assumed he needed help with something like that. I answered "Sure Bryan. Let my just open the app." Pulling Amazon up on my phone. "So what did you need help with? Something about lighters" I ask. He replies still sounding serious "I keep searching for lighters and the app keeps showing me matches. Can you try it and see if that happens to me too." I type 'Lighter' into the search bar, submit the search and looking at my results, seeing product listings for lighters. "Looks normal to me. I'm seeing nothing but lighters" He responds starting to crack "Yeah! Nothing but matches!"

I got played.

EDIT: Wording fix

Commercial comes on regarding lighter yogurt, not as thick as Greek yogurt.

Sister: I actually like thicker yogurt so it's not as runny.

Dad: Yeah I don't like runny yogurt either. I can never catch up to it.

Child: Sorry dad! I got light lemonade instead of the normal kind

Father: picks up lemonade Well of course it's lighter than normal. You got the small size.

I tried to look up lighters and all they had was 18,346 matches.

I tried to look up lighters and all they had were 13,570 matches

I tried to look up lighters and all they had was 12579 matches

I tried looking up lighters and all they had were thousands of matches.

I tried to look up lighters and all they had was 13,749 matches.

I tried looking up lighters but all they had was 3,478 matches.