A list of puns related to "Lake House"
The friend says "hey, is he yours?"
The guy replies "yep, kept him after I found him alone by the lake. He can't communicate with any of the other birds."
His friend looked confused. "Is he mute?"
"No. I think he speaks porch geese."
Honestly, Iโm feeling a lot of pier pressure.
Daycare Lady: "does your Grandpa have a house on the lake?"
Son (with a serious face): "no his house is on the grass."
Background: My family was at the lake today. The lake was a little choppy today so when we went on the boat we hit one really big wave where the front end of the boat came crashing down hard. My nephew (7) just happened to be sitting on a cup holder and it hurt his butt when we landed.
We got back to the house and my nephew said...
Nephew: my butt hurts. I think its broken.
Me: did I ever tell you about the time I broke my butt?
Nephew: no. Is it still broken?
Me: yeah. Thereโs a big crack in it still.
He didnโt get it. But all the other adults laughed/rolled their eyes. Stupid joke I know, but I donโt care.
Family and I went on a fancy boat tour of a local rich lake. The captain provided a running narrative over the intercom about the history of the houses, etc.
Captain: You'll notice all the piers look the same on the lake. There's no law governing that, everyone just agrees they should use the same color and materials. Some might call that "pier pressure."
Crowd: (groans)
Me: I think we need to dock him some points for that one...
Wife: (groans and pretends not to know me)
Why couldnโt the witch have children? Her husband had a hallow weenie.
Which ghost is the best dancer? The Boogie Man!
Friend: What are you gonna be for halloween? Me: Drunk!
For Halloween Iโm going to write โLifeโ on a plain white T-shirt and hand out lemons to strangers
This Halloween, the only Candy Iโm interersted in swings from a pole and has daddy issues
โHalloweenโ = an excuse for girls to dress up like sluts.
Thank goodness for Halloween, all of a sudden, cobwebs in my house are decorations!
Iโll be your trick if youโll be my treat.
How do Rednecks celebrate Halloween? Pump kin!
When do ghouls and goblins cook their victims? On Fry Day
Whatโs a monsters favorite desert? I-Scream!
What do you call a Halloween boner? Petrified wood
What do you call a dancing ghost? Polka-haunt-us
What do you call a hot dog with nothing inside it? A โhollow-weenie!โ
Did you hear about the wild party at the haunted house? The whole vibe was anything ghost (goes).
How do you write a book about halloween? With a ghostwriter.
Iโm going to celebrate Halloween the same way I always doโฆ by murdering a bunch of teens by the lake. Sincerely,
Two monsters went to a Halloween party. Suddenly one said to the other, โA lady just rolled her eyes at me. What should I do?โ The other monster replied, โBe a gentleman and roll them back to her.
The lesson of Halloween is that pretending to be something youโre not will lead to a sweet reward.
I remember when Halloween was the scariest night of the year. Now, itโs Election night.
I want to be something really scary for Halloween this year so Iโm dressing up as a phone battery at 2%.
Why dident the skeleten go to the halloween party? Becuse he had no body to go with.
What did the bird say on Halloween? Trick or tweet!
What do Italianโs eat on Halloween? Fettucinni Afraid-o (Ha ha ha)
Why canโt the boy ghost have babies? A. Because he has a Hallo-weenie.
What do goblins and ghosts drink when theyโre hot and thirsty on Halloween? A. Ghoul-aid!!!
What do ghosts eat for supper? Spooketi
What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house? Hope itโs Halloween!!
What is the most important subject a witch learns in school? Spelling.
Trying to explain what's around his house he says, "do you know Iona Lake?"
I reply with "No I did not, but good for you man."
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