My mama once told me to never trust the king of the jungle

because no matter what he tells you he's lion.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kevindavis338
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 21 2022
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If the Lion is the king of the jungle, which animal is the king of the forest?

The Mooseiah

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ChieftainNincompoop
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 01 2021
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The king of the jungle always wore a certain pocket flower whenever it went outside. Do you know why?

It was a dandy-lion.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DeadOnDeparture98
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 05 2021
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Some people say tigers are the king of the jungle.

But they would be lion.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ThusSpokeGaba
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 31 2021
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β€ͺWhat would’ve been a better name for the lion instead of King of the Jungle?‬

Emperoar

πŸ‘οΈŽ 35
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/dubaidadjokes
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 27 2020
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The hippopotamus is the true king of the jungle

That's why they call it "hippocracy".

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/morpipls
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 13 2020
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I once had the king of the jungle tell me he was actually a tiger.

He was lion.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/drozzi007
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 03 2020
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How can we be sure that the lion is king of the jungle?

He’s always liong.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ssj3dvp11
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 19 2020
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Why shouldn't you trust the offspring of the king of the jungle and the fastest cat on earth?

Because they're lion cheetahs.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/b-dawg
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 17 2020
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Why didn't any of the animals believe the hunter when he said he was the king of the jungle?

Because he was a lion.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Soulburn85
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 24 2019
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Lion walks into a bar and orders a drink.

An hour later, the bartender returns with his pint of beer.

Lion: What took you so long?!

Bartender: Look, you are not the only customer in here. Who do you think you are, the king of the jungle?

Enraged, the lion gobbled her up and proceeded to down his beer before leaving. He was found dead not too far from the bar.

Cause of death was later determined that the lion mixed his alcohol with the bar bitch he ate.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jhn714
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 17 2022
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Far away there is a purple country

In this purple country everything is purple; the skies are purple, the sun is purple, the citizens are purple. Everything is purple. And one day, some purple citizens decided that they didn't want to live under the purple king so they tried to leave the purple country. But the purple king stopped them and imprisoned them in his purple jail, and there they stayed for many purple days

However, one day, a purple messenger came to tell the purple king on his purple throne in his purple palace that the purple prisoners had escaped from the purple prison. And so, the purple king got on his purple horse along with his 100 purple knights to travel across the purple country to bring back the purple prisoners.

Meanwhile, the purple prisoners had begun running across the purple country to try and escape the purple tyranny of the purple king. They traveled across the vast purple plain, and everything was fine, but they had now reached the purple dessert. With no other choice they started the arduous journey under the blistering purple sun. Many purple prisoners died from purple heat stroke or got bitten by poisonous purple snakes, but after all is said and done, the majority of them made it across alive. But by this point, the purple king with his purple knights had reached the start of the purple dessert. They too crossed with many dying from purple heat stroke or purple snakes.

However, the purple prisoners were now crossing the purple mountains. Many died from the purple cold or got killed by purple rocks falling down the purple mountain side. But they made it across with still 50% of the starting escapees. But the purple king was crossing now, his purple knights dying from purple cold and purple rocks. They were close to the purple prisoners now. They reached the far side, but the purple prisoners had entered the purple jungle. They were so hungry many took to eating purple berries, only to find out that they contained purple poison and they died instantly. The purple creatures began attacking the purple prisoners and many died from that. And to make matters worse, the purple knights, who also had been attacked by the purple creatures and ate the purple poisonous berries, had caught up with them.

Back they went through the purple jungle, being attacked by the purple animals. Back they went over the purple mountains suffering from purple cold and being hit by purple rocks. Back they went over the purple dessert with the poisonous purple snakes and the scorchin

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Savage_Oppress
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 06 2022
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Some animals go out for dinner at a restaurant

The lion being king of the jungle gets to order first and orders a steak.

The waiter asks "How would you like your meat?"

The lion says "ROAR!" (Raw)

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Captain_Pleasure
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 16 2022
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Do you know how badass lions are?

They became kings of the jungle without even living there

πŸ‘οΈŽ 22
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JustINCREDyble
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 31 2020
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500 bricks on an airplane and one falls off. How many are left?

((To be played back and forth with a friend as questions and answers))

[499.]

What are the three steps to putting an elephant in a refrigerator? [1. Open door. 2. Put elephant in. 3. Close door.]

What are the four steps to putting a giraffe in a refrigerator? [1. Open door. 2. Remove elephant. 3. Put giraffe in. 4. Close door.]

All the animals attend a birthday party for the king of the jungle, except one. Who didn’t attend? [The giraffe. He’s still in the refrigerator.]

A girl swims across an alligator infested river, but safely makes it to the other side. How was that possible? [All the alligators were at the birthday party.]

The girls still dies though, how come? [The one brick from the airplane fell on her head.]

πŸ‘οΈŽ 253
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DaShMa_
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 11 2018
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Why did the king of the jungle say he was an antelope?

Because he was a lion.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Life_in_Bones
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 29 2018
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