A cat that is naturally good at navigating kitchen surfaces is counter intuitive.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bargeral
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2020
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Dames are more intuitive then Guys

But that’s just a Broad generalization

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Irv-Elephant
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2019
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You wouldn't know it by looking at him, but my friend is a natural at remodeling kitchens.

He's counter intuitive

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SplashbackDeuce
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2020
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What do you call it when you drift a Tesla

An electric slide

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Im2KoolAid4u
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
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I'm so ready to be a dad

I really want to have a daughter and name her Zelda.

I imagine, as she gets older she will spend all her time writing sick poetry and rhymes in her journal, growing her hair down to her back, not to spite me, but so she can donate it later, and expand her wit by studying improv comedy through highschool.

As she becomes famous, I hope she will invite me to one of her rap battles and put me in the front row. My heart will grow as she takes the stage, but fatherly intuition tells me something is wrong...Zelda is frozen at the microphone.

I see her up on the stage, eyes alight with fright, hair pulled tight into a bun. She and I lock eyes, a moment of silence passes and serenity slowly enters...THIS is the moment we have been waiting for all our lives.

Looking up calmly, I couldn't be more proud as I exclaim, "Rap puns, Zel. Rap puns, Zel! Let down your hair!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ImDyxlesic-
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2020
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What do you call an organized kitchen?

Counter intuitive.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/caseystrom
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2020
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I don't do my own taxes

I'm not really Intuit.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rmlrmlchess
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2019
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I took my cute CPA go karting on our first date to a place called Turbo Tracks...

She wasn't Intuit

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sdempsey313
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2019
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I wanted to rearrange everything in our kitchen so we could locate everything without having to think about it.

But that might be too counter intuitive.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/allanon101
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2020
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I use Turbo Tax evrey year for my taxes

I'm really intuit

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thethirdwheel11
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2017
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The psychic had visions only when he sat up near the register at the diner.

It was counter intuitive.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zenpod
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2019
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I have a friend who can tell what a kitchen top is made of just by touching it.

He's counter-intuitive

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SilverwingedOther
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2016
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This guy is really good at installing kitchens...

Some say he’s counter-intuitive.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kaboomer13
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2018
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Common sense isn't very interesting to me

I guess I'm just not that intuit

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DiscoStJohn
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2015
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Japanese Olympic Track and field team [long]

the Japanese Olympic Track and field team, in typical Asian make-every-thing-harder-to-do-than-it-has-to-be fashion have announced that hey are sticking by their regimen of only using malformed, decade-and-a-half old, equipment rigged to pop out of the course unexpectedly in order to secure their hopes of Olympic glory. While this may seem counter intuitive, Kadauo Osakamizu, a analyst for the team claims there is actually a historic cultural precedent for the odd exercises. In a quote, Mr. Osakamizu insists that the idea is that "if the team can excel with such sub-par materials, executing wins when the equipment is good should be of little concern."

So it seems that at least for the foreseeable future, Japan will be pinning their hopes on Teenage, Mutant, Ninja Hurdles.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheStaffmaster
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2016
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Forward from dad several years ago...

WHY YOU NEVER QUESTION A DRUNK

A woman was shopping at her local supermarket, where she selected:

A half-gallon of 2% milk, A carton of eggs, A quart of orange juice, A head of romaine lettuce, A 2 lb. can of coffee, And a 1 lb. package of bacon.

As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier.

While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, "You must be single."

The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status.

Curiosity getting the better of her, she said "Well, you know what, you're absolutely correct, but how on earth did you know that?"

The drunk replied, "Cause you're ugly."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Doctor01001010
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2013
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I recently replaced the surfaces in our kitchen to surprise my wife...

...and I used the cheap stuff, but it looked real, so I thought maybe it'd fool her.

No such luck. My wife is so "counter-intuitive" due to her high "counter-intelligence" that it didn't matter how "counter-productive" I'd been, she took one look at it and just knew. So instead of taking it for "granite," she threw a "counter-fit."

(Proud dad. All the jokes in this subreddit sound like ones I would make...)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JustinJamm
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2013
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I used to love doing my taxes.

But this year, I'm just not that Intuit.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/habsfan1112
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2018
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