A list of puns related to "InspectIT"
Before you let your kids get a puppy, take the Puppy Test.
Best taken in the autumn or mid winter.
In 1827, after Beethoven died, he was buried outside the local church, in the graveyard, and people came to pay their respects frequently.
One morning, about a week after the funeral, two girls came to leave some flowers on his grave, only to hear strange, unearthly sounds coming from it. Creeped out, they called for the local Paranormal Investigator.
The Investigator arrived an hour later, and with him, a small crowd, who had come to see what was happening to the composerβs grave.
Suddenly, one member of the crowd exclaimed, βI recognise that sound! Itβs his 9th Symphony, backwards!β
Soon after, another said, βand thatβs his 8th, backwards!β
After leaning closer to the grave to inspect this for himself, the Investigator straightened himself up, gave a soft chuckle, and said:
βNever fear, ladies and gentlemen! Beethovenβs just decomposing.β
On the night walk with our 2 pups. One is obsessed with toads and every item on the road is suspiciously inspected. Frequently a leaf is sniffed and nosed to encourage a leap. Tonight, a piece of gravel caught her eye with exuberant tailnub wagging! βOh pupper that isnβt sedentary; itβs sedimentary.β
Hope you like it too.
Beaten up from their last encounter with Agent Smith and his agents, they take a seat at the bar.
Morpheus is nursing his right shoulder, Neo has a busted lip and Trinity has a large cut on her left hand.
Neo says, "Bartender give us your best bottle of whiskey. We're gonna need it."
The bartender grabs a bottle and three tumblers.
Neo cracks open the whiskey and takes a swig straight from the bottle before grabbing the tumblers.
Trinity, inspecting her hand, says "I'm a little worried that this is gonna get infected."
"Don't worry," Morpheus says as Neo grabs Trinity's hand, "Neo's pourin'."
Ok so here's what you do.
Go onto Amazon or Ebay or whatever and purchase a small dog cage. Make SURE that is is made of either completely STEEL. Nothing else. Get advanced shipping or whatever gets it to your door as fast as humanly possible. Now wait patiently for your package to arrive. Once the delivery person knocks on your door to get you to sign for your package tell them to wait until you open the box. If they seem leery of you explain that you have had trouble in the past with your parcels and you just want to make sure that your order is correct. Open the box and remove the cage from the box. Inspect it thoroughly. Now LISTEN CAREFULLY! This is the part you can't mess up. Look up from the cage and stare into that poor delivery person's eyes. Like so deep you can see their ancestors. Say these exact words. "I knew it... I can't believe I ordered a nickel less cage."
But on closer inspection, it seemed counter productive.
I was cruising through the meat section and a nearby married couple were checking out some lamb shoulders that were on special. The mum picks up a roast, inspects it and deposits it in their trolley where she then notices the package had leaked a bit.
"Oh!" She says. "I've got a bloody hand!"
"You've always had two bloody hands," jokes the dad.
young cousin fascinatedly inspecting one of our house plants "Uncle Dad, what's this plant called?" "I think it's called a 'wandering Jew'". "Oh, is it dangerous?" "Yeah, they're not very gentile."
"It's because it has emissions problems." "How did it pass safety inspection if it has emissions problems?" "I guess the tests weren't very exhaustive."
The other day at work our usual wine delivery guy came in, so I alerted my manager.
Me: The wine delivery is here.
Him: Sweet.
Me (pretending to inspect the wine) : Actually, I think it's a white.
So I was at Taco Bell with my dad and when he handed the cashier the money, he got $5 back in cash
When he further inspected it he saw there was a little bit of it torn off.
So then he approached the cashier and said he only got $4.80 back instead of $5
She held back a groan and asked if he wanted a new $5 bill
I'm now embarrassed to go to Taco Bell
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