My partner M(33) and I were just having this discussion. I don't think I sweat while I sleep. I know he does, and he tried to convince me without any evidence that I do as well, just saying that everyone sweats while they sleep. Is this true? I tried to google it and all I could find was about night sweats and sweating conditions and that's not quite what I was looking for.

Any thoughts from you all?

The funeral director was asking us what we think Mum should wear in her casket.

Mum always loved to wear sarongs (fabric wraps that go around the torso and drape downward a bit like a long skirt would), so my uncle suggested that she wear a sarong in there.

The funeral director looked a bit confused, as did some of our family members, to which my uncle added:

"What's sarong with that?"

I started laughing like an idiot. He was proud of it too. The funeral director was rather shocked. We assured her, and our more proper relatives, that Mum would've absolutely loved the joke (which is very true).

His delivery was perfect. I'll never forget the risk he took. We sometimes recall the moment as a way help cushion the blows of the grieving process.

--Edit-- I appreciate the condolences. I'm doing well and the worst is behind me and my family. But thanks :)

--Edit-- Massive thanks for all the awards and kind words. And the puns! Love 'em.

I would have a daughter

But Bill kept the Windows

True story; it even happened last night. My 5-year-old son walks up behind me and out of the blue says, "hey."

I turn to him and say, "yeah, kiddo? What's up?"

He responds, "it's dead grass."

I'm really confused and trying to figure out what's wrong and what he wants from me. "What? There's dead grass? What's wrong with that?"

.

.

.

He says, totally straight-faced, "hay is dead grass," and runs off.

You officially hit rock bottom

Capital of Ireland

It's Dublin everyday

No it doesn't.

And then you will all be sorry.

Now it’s syncing.

He replied, "Well, stop going to those places then!"

I will find you. You have my Word.

She said how do you know he was headed to work?

“thank you for your cervix.”

...sails are going through the roof.

Made me smile

Mods said I'm a cereal reposter...

A taxi

But now I stand corrected.

There seems to be a lot of dangerous (mis)information floating around recently about extended dry fasting, so I'm going to take a little time to explain why it's so terrible. Please note this is NOT directed to short-term dry fasts (of a day or less), like those observed in many religious practices.

>Water is essential for life. From the time that primeval species ventured from the oceans to live on land, a major key to survival has been prevention of dehydration. [...] Without water, humans can survive only for days. [1]

1. Without water you will die in a matter of days/weeks.

It's kind of shocking that this even needs to be stated, but here we are. Everyone that has ever considered survival priorities knows the importance of water. Prehistoric Neanderthals understood this, even your house cat understands this, but apparently people here need a reminder because they watched some idiot on YouTube.

Death by dehydration is incredibly common. Some 500,000 people in the US are hospitalized every year for dehydration and a full 2% of those admissions die at hospital [2]. So it's not like we're talking about an extremely rare and exotic condition that doctors don't understand well. In fact we have better data on death by dehydration than almost any other form of death I can think of, since terminal dehydration in end-of-life situations is so common. For example, discontinuing sustenance in patients in a persistent vegetative state is known to lead to death from dehydration after about 10 to 14 days from a vast body of experience including that of hospice nurses [3, 4]. The precise amount of time you can survive without water depends on factors like your initial hydration level, exertion levels, the temperature/humidity of the climate you’re in, medical conditions, etc.—but, after losing enough water (usually ~10-15% of bm) death WILL be the outcome [5].

Now this isn't to say you're immediately going to drop dead if you don't take water for a day or two. The point is that by depriving your body of wate

Wait. Sorry, wrong sub.

Wookie mistake.

Theoretical Fizz-ics

Because you can’t ‘C’ in the dark

I said, “That makes two of us.”

so I had to ground him.

He's doing better currently.

And conducting himself properly.

An assassin

Me: Can we change the subject?

My wife: Okay. More chores around the house need to be done by you.

Now he’s a great grandfather

Crows mostly drank alone.