Andrew Garfield, Tobey McGuire and Tom Holland got into an accident upon arriving at a party. /r/Jokes/comments/tlfnm2/…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bullsaint
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2022
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What is a pilot from Holland called?

>!A Flying Dutchman!<

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bancoarotelle
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2021
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So Tom Hanks is going to visit the wind turbine museum in Holland.

Some really big fans there.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RatBoyAndTheKid
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2021
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I would like to go to Holland some day

Wooden shoe?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Niyi_M
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2020
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What does James Hetfield sing when he travels to Holland with Metallica?

We're off to Nether Netherlands.

dad jokes

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bmantis311
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2021
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I saw a pet shop selling cats from Holland this morning

So I walked in and asked them....

..... How Dutch is that Moggie in the window!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Stoatwobbler
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2021
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I'm not personally a fan of Holland and all of their windmills.

However, there are a lot of big fans.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bearnakedrabies
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
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If a guy from Holland marries a Filipino will their children be....

Hollapinos

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wayne84bruce22
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2019
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I can't stop my hobby of climbing the highest mountains. I just climbed the second highest, and now I'm wondering...

...Will I Everest?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/_Lenti
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2021
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If Heineken is brewed in Holland...

Does that mean their beer is Hollandaise sauce?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ransidmeat
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2019
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Why are plumbers in Holland so rich?

Because everyone has clogs.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ApexPOTATOe
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2019
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What do you call a musical Dutch breakfast?

Holland Oats

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πŸ‘€︎ u/electric_ranger
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2021
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If someone from Holland and the Philippines had a child...

Would their child be a JalapeΓ±o?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jake-eik
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2018
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I've always wanted to go to Holland someday

Wooden shoe?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Something_Syck
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2016
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Since they are filming Spider-Man 3 near my house, I thought I’d write the lead actor an orchestral piece...

I think I’ll call it β€œMr. Holland’s Opus”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/leeericewing
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2021
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The hidden puns of LexisNexis

Years ago I used to use a LexisNexis database of companies that would give corporate information like name, address, and general business description. While most of them were pretty bland, there were a bunch of them with some really cheesy puns, and over a few years I built quite a collection.

Today I share with you "NEXIS IS RIDICULOUS.txt":

  • Bucyrus International caters to those who mine their own business.
  • It would be logical for Mr. Spock to boldly go to Vulcan International for rubber products. He might even live long and prosper -- in comfortable shoes.
  • What do manufacturer Electro-Motive Diesel (EMD) and 1970s band Grand Funk Railroad have in common? They both want you to do the locomotion!
  • Peter Piper can pick more than a peck of peppers or pickles from B&G Foods.
  • Toray Plastics America could sing "foam, foam on the range, where the polyester and polypropylene materials are made" all day.
  • Break out the Tums, because things are awfully gassy over at Air Liquide America.
  • If a tree falls in a Weyerhaeuser forest, someone is there to hear it -- and he has a chainsaw.
  • Although not a pushover, you can walk all over Wilsonart International.
  • Here's a HEICO haiku: HEICO companies/ Providing for jet engines/ In flight or on land.
  • American Italian Pasta Company (AIPC) uses its noodle in many different ways.
  • The golf industry doesn't mind when Aldila gives it the shaft.
  • Rat-a-tat-tat and a ringa-ding-ding. What's that? Answer: The sounds emanating from Pearl, one of the world's foremost makers of drums and other percussion and musical instruments.
  • Saint-Gobain Ceramics & Plastics deals powders and crystal, but there's no need to call the cops.
  • Pamida Stores Operating Company offers more small-town values than a bandwagon of Republicans on the campaign trail.
  • Like a tight end, offshore drilling contractor Transocean dreams of going deep but doesn't mind eating a little mud.
  • Rittal me this, Batman!
  • Utility Trailer Manufacturing is spreading its own brand of reefer madness.
  • Who is the Fresh Prince of Sullair?
  • If GrafTech International were a bard, it could wax poetic in an ode to the electrode.
  • When it comes to adhesives and vibration control products, LORD knows.
  • You might say that Deere & Company enjoys its customers going to seed.
  • Pfizer pfabricates pfarmaceuticals pfor quite a pfew inpfirmities.
  • Stripping is OK at Spraylat.
  • Don't think Seton is
... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2016
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Ahh the hollandaise imgur.com/vFQIzI0
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πŸ‘€︎ u/naturallyparanoid
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2015
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Are you Hungary [OC]

Are Ukraine your neck to Czech on the Turkey that they put down the Holland Finished with Chilli because there is Norway it will have Germans on it if you Russia to get there to Welsh and eat it because you're Hungary. Or will you let it die in Spain and leave Denmark on your name. If you do will you leave it on the Iraq and leave because Iran away to save my Korea.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RedDragon98
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2017
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What is the Netherland’s favorite band?

Holland oats

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πŸ“…︎ May 15 2019
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What's the difference between Jesuit clergy and Benedictine clergy?

Jesuit clergy have Vatican Days, while Benidictine Clergy have Holland Days.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/quackdamnyou
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2019
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What do you call musically-inclined horse feed from the Netherlands?

Holland Oats.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DooDad-DontMother
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2018
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Dad and I were picking out beer at the store...

I suggest New Holland's Dragon's Milk.

"You know how they make that beer?" he asks.

"No, how?"

"Buncha short-legged cows."

"What?"

"Draggin' milk."

At the check-out he's still laughing to himself and making comments about being "utterly" hilarious.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thrasymachuspp1
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2015
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Why do eggs-benedict taste better in Amsterdam?

The Holland-daze

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ultra-saurus
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2015
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What do Dutch baby boomers eat for breakfast?

Holland oats

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VikingofRock
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2015
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World cup dadjoke.

While watching the Spain - Holland match at the world cup, my dad dropped this...

Dad: What game is on next?

Me: Chile Australia.

Dad: Not it's not.

Me: What?

Dad: It's warm in Australia not chilly.

Me: sigh.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GRI23
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13 2014
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I'd like to go to Holland some day...

Wooden shoe?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/modsquad20
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2020
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I'd like to go to Holland some day...

Wooden shoe?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2020
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I'd love to go to Holland, wooden shoe?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fishflops
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2015
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