I've just deleted all the German names off my pre owned iPhone..

It's totally Hans free now...

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2022
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U-gan-da
πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dieyoupigfucker
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2017
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Before I went into surgery, I was given a choice between two rooms.

I told them that either OR was fine.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SolWishing12
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2022
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Why did the girl stop eating meat and dairy products?

She vegan to feel guilty about it.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ May 02 2019
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Two friends Bob and Frank are lost in the jungle when they are surrounded by a group of blood thirsty cannibals.

They are surrounded by dozens of the fierce blood thirsty warriors armed with clubs and spears. The leader of the warriors approaches the two friends and informs them they are trespassing on sacred land and unless they can prove they are descendants of the Gods they will be killed and eaten.

Bob and Frank realize they have little choice but agree they will attempt any test to try to save their lives.

The chief warrior brings them a bowl full of angry fire ants and drops one small seed into the bowl. He informs them they must put their lips in the bowl and suck as hard as they can. If they manage to suck up only the seed without sucking up an ant then the tribe would know they must be sent from the Gods.

Bob looks wearily at Frank but knowing they have no other options he puts his lips in the bowl and sucks hard. He immediately gets a mouth full of ants and screams in pain as they bite away at the inside of his mouth. Frank now even more nervous takes his turn and to his dismay also receives a nasty mouthful of the viscous buggers.

The warriors leap to their feet and surround the friends, β€œNow you must die” declares the chieftain. Just as the first spear is raised to Franks throat he screams β€œTria-Gan!” The warriors stop dead in their tracks. β€œWhat did you say” asked the chief. β€œTria-Gan” yelled frank again. Immediately the chief and his warriors turned and fled into the forest.

β€œHoly shit” said Bob β€œWhat did you just say and how did you know it would work?”

β€œWell” said Frank, β€œmy Mother always told me if at first you don’t suck seed try Tria-Gan.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/usernamemispeled
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2019
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