Nightwear on Elm Street.
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πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
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How can you tell a dogwood tree from an elm tree?

By the bark

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jaxerfp
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
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Whenever someone asks me if I prefer maples, elms, or oaks, my response is always the same:

"It's not a poplar tree contest."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ganders81
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2020
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There we were, driving through a small southern town with my mom and she says, β€œMaple, elm, cedar, all these streets are named after trees. I wonder why.”

Then there’s me over here, β€œI guess tree names were poplar. β€œ

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mapkar
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2018
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I had to make a delivery today on elm street.

It was a nightmare.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BenJaquenhoft
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2016
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My birtch of a wife just told me she wants a divorce.

She said she’s tired of all of my tree puns.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BHarcade
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2020
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So I my son started to bark at me

Kept on insisting that I had promised to build him a treehouse but I don't remember evergreening this elm of a contract. Though he kept inisisting I had birch the agreement due to the long delay but my attempt to confern the fertility of the spruce was in roots. Now I have to oak up and face the spruce. My weekend has been soiled and I now have to maple my son's treehouse whilst I willow my day away. Although... Now that I twig about it, having a treehouse in my yard sounds like a pine idea.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WisdomThingy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
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What do you call a tree that’s a singer?

Spruce Springsteen

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SethTheBoss07
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2020
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Ah, I see your probelm
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nodnodwinkwink
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2017
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