Which part of our body lives the longest?

Pupils...they dilate.

πŸ‘︎ 31
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/anvesh_parab
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2020
🚨︎ report
My optometrist had my pupils dilated today

It was an eye-opening experience.

πŸ‘︎ 58
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/king_england
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2016
🚨︎ report
This story is about a man called Trevor, and his obsession with tractors.

Trevor loved tractors. And I mean, really loved tractors. Forget any obsessions or high-level interests you may have, chances are they pale in the face of Trevor’s love for tractors.

Every day Trevor would get up, in his tractor-themed bedroom in his tractor-themed house, with its tractor-themed wallpaper and tractor-themed carpets, and he would make his bed with its tractor-themed duvet and tractor-themed sheets. He would go downstairs in his tractor-themed pajamas into his tractor-themed kitchen, with its tractor-themed tiles and cupboards, and he would eat his breakfast while perusing the latest tractor-themed magazine or annual.

Trevors’s degree in Agricultural Engineering hung on his living room wall, along with a copy of his thesis, which centred around (you guessed it) tractors. The living room was decorated with all sorts of tractor-related trinkets, including die-cast models, paintings and drawings.

The hedges in Trevor’s front garden were trimmed in the shape of tractors. His lawn was vividly decorated with tractor-driving garden gnomes, and his garden furniture was constructed from various parts from vintage tractor designs.

Trevor just had one thing missing from his otherwise tractor-centric life; he had never actually owned, nor driven, a real tractor.

Not for his lack of trying, of course. Trevor had been to many tractor shows over the years, and visited many farms with friends of his, but none of the tractors he had seen had ever been quite right. Trevor was so knowledgeable about tractors that every single one he had come across had possessed some hidden trait that he wasn’t keen on. His first experience of driving a real tractor had to be perfect.

One day, Trevor was flicking through one of his favourite publications, Powertrain Quarterly, when there was a knock at the door. Trevor answered, and it was his friend and fellow tractor enthusiast, Jeff.

Trevor welcomed Jeff in, and over tea and crumpets served on tractor-themed crockery, they discussed the merits of aluminium drawbars and front-end loaders. Eventually Trevor pressed Jeff to explain the reason for his visit.

β€œWell” said Jeff, β€œAs I’m sure you know the convention comes to town later”.

The convention. Trevor had been thinking of little else the past three weeks. The neighbouring town annually threw a convention for farmers, particularly farmyard machinery. There would be combine harvesters, lawnmowers, and of course, tractors.

β€œYes of course” replied Trevor

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ShredderSte
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Which body part dies last ?

The eyes, because they dilate.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2020
🚨︎ report
After you die, what part of your body is the last to stop working?

Your pupils because they dilate...

πŸ‘︎ 33
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the grim reaper have an eyeball phobia?

Because they dilate.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Theboopaloop
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2019
🚨︎ report
I want my son to stay healthy and fit, so I don’t want him to go to school.

Because it’s normal that pupils dilate.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Lum1nar
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Got my girlfriend (in labour with our first son, having strong contractions) on the way to the hospital

Me: So you think he might be born by midnight?

Her: I dunno...we might get in there and the triage nurse says I'm only 1cm

Me: Hmmm...I think you're more like 5'2"

It went down as well as you might expect.

πŸ‘︎ 357
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RadToTheBone86
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2015
🚨︎ report
Why do opticians have a long life expectancy?

Because they dilate.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25 2019
🚨︎ report
I just got my wife with this one in the delivery room

My wife has been in labour for about 18 hours and was at 8-9cm of dilation when the nurse last checked.

The nurse said that she'll wait another half hour before checking again and then hopefully she can start pushing. My wife said "sure, what's another half hour?"

I said "30 minutes."

πŸ‘︎ 69
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cpstone1
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2017
🚨︎ report
Inspired by Circumcision Story

After reading the circumcision story from u/Oemus2776 this morning, I was reminded of how little the nurses at my wife’s first birth appreciated my comedic stylings.

My wife was in labor and the nurse came in to check the dilation of the cervix. She had her hand under the sheet and said, β€œalright now, I’m just feeling for change.” I replied, β€œwell you’re in luck! I found two dimes and a quarter in there just yesterday!”

Crickets...

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MrNanny
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2018
🚨︎ report
Did you know optometrists live longer?

They dilate

πŸ‘︎ 121
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cuber1717
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2016
🚨︎ report
Two Pregnant Ladies

Two pregnant ladies meet at the prenatal care unit. They quickly hit it off and can't wait to start hanging out. They have ladies nights on Mondays, double dates with their husbands on Wednesdays, but on Fridays they decided to learn Karate. The instructor at the dojo reluctantly accepts, against the advice of his understudy. Go figure, two weeks in, both ladies have their water break. The instructor tells his understudy,

"quick, call my Optometrist!"

The understudy responds, "What? No, I should call for an ambulance. Why would I call your Optometrist at a time like this?"

"Because my pupils are dilating!"

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Guythedestroyer
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2014
🚨︎ report
My friend just became a dad, but I'm the one who got him.

Me: Did you guys have your baby yet?

Him: Not yet, almost. She is 9cm.

Me: Wow, that's a small baby...

Him: ..... No, 9cm dilated

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SmigAndBelly
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2016
🚨︎ report
When you die, which part of your body is the last to die?

Pupils. They dilate.

πŸ‘︎ 301
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Nikoklis
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2020
🚨︎ report
When you die which body part dies the last?

Your pupils, they dilate.

πŸ‘︎ 91
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/-_-STRANGER-_-
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2019
🚨︎ report
What part of your body is the last to die?

Your eyes, cause they dilate

πŸ‘︎ 49
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/goblu33
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2019
🚨︎ report
When you die, which part of the body is the last one to stop working?

The pupils. They dilate

πŸ‘︎ 215
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HappyLlamaJamma
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s the last part of your body to die?

The eyes, because they DILATE

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheTexican11
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2019
🚨︎ report
After you die, what part of the human body is the last to stop working?

Your pupils; they dilate.

πŸ‘︎ 96
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/succdicc69
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2019
🚨︎ report
After you die, what’s the last part of your body that stops working?

Your Pupils. They dilate.

πŸ‘︎ 176
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TearDesire
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2019
🚨︎ report
What part of your body dies last?

Your pupils! They dilate.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2019
🚨︎ report
After you die, what part of your body is the last to stop functioning?

Your pupils. They dilate.

πŸ‘︎ 66
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/shibathefox
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2019
🚨︎ report
After you die, what part of your body is the last to stop working...?

Your pupils. They dilate.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/w00dw0rk3r
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2019
🚨︎ report
When you die, what part of your body stops working last?

Your pupils because they dilate.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/698969
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2019
🚨︎ report
After you die, what part of your body is the last to stop working?

Your pupils. They dilate

πŸ‘︎ 90
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/StumpySequoia
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2019
🚨︎ report
When you die, which is the last part of your body to stop working?

Your pupils. They dilate.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/adon111
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2019
🚨︎ report
After you die, what part of you body is the last to stop working?

Your pupils. They dilate.

πŸ‘︎ 50
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheCuteInExecute
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2019
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.