April fools Day.
Doris locked that’s why I’m knocking
She started an OnlyFins.
Just keep trimming~
I didn't think it was that cute
Now things are Hunky Dory.
DORI-TOES
I bet it was really interesting.
Cute? It’s a Dory ball!
Knock knock Who's there? Doris Doris who? Doris locked
When getting ready to leave the house:
"Dad can you put my shoes on?"
"They won't fit me"
And upon picking them up from school:
"How was Doris today"
"Dad, there is no one at school called Doris"
"Oh was she sick today?"
"I wonder what it would be like to live under water..." said my girlfriend on our way to see Finding Dory, to which I responded with "I don't know, but I bet you'd be under a lot of pressure."
She hung her head in shame because she knew my entire family would soon hear about this.
When Bruce Springsteen went to a Polynesian restaurant and was served blue tang baked in a delicious lightly caramelized sauce, what song did he write about it?
Dory Glaze
So it's 5pm and I start talking to my dad about dinner, because it always takes ages to decide. Over the next hour and a half, he proceeds to ignore all dinner planning conversation. It comes down to a heated conversation in the kitchen where I begin dramatically shaking his shoulders and asking 'Don't you remember me starting this conversation NEARLY TWO HOURS AGO? Do you REMEMBER?! TWO HOURS! I am DYING!' My dad smirks. 'Hi dying, I'm..' at which point I begin my dramatic eyeroll... '...Dory!'. Pause.
'Do you get it? Like Finding Nemo.'
'...yeah dad. I got it.'
TL
"Doris"
"Doris who?"
"Doris locked, that's why im knocking."
