A/N: Hey, guys! Finally got this episode hammered out! We're into Act IV and back on the offensive!
This episode is a bit short, for what they have been lately, only 8600 words or so, but we're getting back into the action.
I've got a good handle on what happens in Episodes 19 and 20, decent outlines for both, and 17.5 and 18.5 half-episodes, though future updates will continue to be slow. I'm moving at the end of the month, and work will continue to be busy right up until I leave. Hopefully I'll have everything set up and settled into my new place by the end of February, and I'll be able to get into a more regular posting schedule after that. The new job is a much lighter workload, and I should have a lot more free time to do all the things I want to do outside of work.
I've got some maps of Gahla that I've been working on, too, that I'll be sharing here at some point. They still need some work before I'm happy with them, and the map files are also on my desktop which is on its way to a container ship with the rest of my household goods, so it'll be bit before I'm able to share them.
Once I get settled into my new place, I'll also be looking to start commissioning character and story art again, since I'll have more time to reach out to and work with artists.
In the meantime, though, here is the next episode!
Edit: [Patreon link.]
Retreat Hell – Episode 18
“Three fucking weeks.”
“Say again, Sergeant?” Meyer turned to look at Bradford as she stared over the hesco wall.
“It’s been three fucking weeks, sir, since we finished getting this FOB set up, and we’re still sitting here.” She snorted. “It’s bad enough we haven’t seen any fucking Keeblers since the first week of the war. We’ve built eight FOBs chained out over five hundred kilometers without seeing a single elf. Now we’ve been twiddling our thumbs up our asses for so long, the goddamn Army’s caught up.” She waved at the latest in a line of trucks and Humvees rolling up to the gate in the compound’s southern wall.
“Disappointed the elves aren’t giving us any resistance, Sergeant?”
“Sir,” she said, turning away from the wall. “We’re Marines. We exist to fight and kill the enemy, and right now we don
... keep reading on reddit ➡Kandi'kayn nudged Shandaar with his psychic powers as the psychic hologram shifted again. It showed four Young Ones trying to drive forward a clutch of combat slavespawn that were capable of rapid adaption to enemy actions as well as being psychically linked.
They were resisting being moved down the hallway to the point that the Young Ones were using their psychic powers to push them forward while the slavespawn's legs skittered on the flooring as they tried to push backwards.
**it appears the slavespawn are in no hurry to encounter the lemur** Kandi'kayn mused.
**how far have we fallen that our slavespawn show more pattern recognition and self-preservation than one such as the chief defense officer** Shandaar asked.
**they have fallen far convinced of their own superiority and perfection unaware that the universe ever moves on and the old falls away to the new** Kandi'kayn whispered back.
**what do you two plot** the Vessel Commander asked, rotating in place, held aloft by its psychic powers, phasic energy rippling below it.
**a plan** Shandaar admitted.
**of what sorts** the Vessel Commander asked, narrowing its eyes. It did not trust Shandaar at all, there was just something about the younger Atrekna that it did not trust.
**a plan to save ourselves from the mad lemur before it works itself into a high enough battle frenzy to rip through the bulkheads and kill us all** Shadaar said. She smiled to herself inside. **should the lemur become too frenzied it will not only seek to kill us all but it will seek out things to devour for nourishment as well as beings and objects to satisfy its sexual urgings which will only grow the longer it fights**
There was silence on the command deck for a long moment.
**what urges** the Vessel Commander asked.
**biological mammal sexual urges** Shandaar answered. **the Mad Lemurs of Terra are exceedingly violent in their sexual copulations violence is a part of their reproductive cycle and so violence excites them**
**sexually** Kandi'kayn added.
**how would you know this** the Vessel Commander scoffed.
**during the Siege of Nineteen Stars I observed lemurs ove
... keep reading on reddit ➡Ayo, so basically I am pretty new to drifting and I have a question. So everytime I try to drift I start understeering and I don't know how to avoid that... The way I was trying to drift is by just slamming the gas at the exit of a corner(its more of a slide than a drift). So do u guys have any tips on that.
PS: I drive a Lexus is 200 XE1 (2l inline 6 w 155hp) if that helps. It's stock (for now)
I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.
Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.
Today sucks! But tomorrow might not. The only way you'll know is if you're around to see it! Are you going to give in to a malevolent universe? It's laughing at you! You! Personally! Are you going to just sit there and let it laugh at you? Let it dominate you? Fight back! Scream, cry, but do not go gently into that dark night! Call or text to our crisis management teams! All calls are anonymous. Call 800-273-8255, operators are standing by!
--Pubvian Public Service Announcement after the Terran Die-Off
Brentili'ik scrolled through the historical data on her terminal, sitting at her desk in the Staff Officer's Quarters on the Telkan Marine base. She'd moved there after the attack on the Planetary Director's Offices and her own home.
She'd also been saddled with power armor wearing guards as well as guards from the Telkan Intelligence Services.
Which is why she had six extra people in her office aside from the newly appointed Director of Intelligence.
The taste of Terran blackberries was across her back teeth and the tip of her nose tingled from the security screens and jamming that was in effect. The windows all slightly vibrated with stripped down warboi code in case anyone tried using a laser microphone on it. Everything was guarded, the data cables in and out of the office were one way only. The room was SCIF (Sensitive Compartmented Information Facility) compliant as well as having the best security the Telkan government could beg, borrow, buy, or steal.
Brentili'ik highlighted another passage in the historical datafile she was going through.
...following the attempted assassination of Confederate diplomats by agents of the Mithril Nebula, the Senate adjourned to seek shelter and only met through hypercom and needlecast conferences. During the conflict elections were held four times. Due to mishandling of the early years of the conflict, over three quarters of the Senate seats were lost to incumbents.
Once the Mithril Nebula Conflict was over, the Senate reconvened...
Brentili'ik tapped her monitor, throwing the data she had highlighted to Kreldan, who had been confirmed with 92% of the vote.
"That's when it happened," she said softly.
Kreldan read it q
... keep reading on reddit ➡
Do your worst!
I'm surprised it hasn't decade.
The Beginning | Wiki Page | Eighth Part | Tenth Part
“You have done well to come this far, intruder,” spoke a dark figure from a stone throne before me.
I kept the .50's crosshair on his head. “Evening, count bloodsucker. I know this is a boss-rush floor, but I’m open to talking it out if you don’t want to re-die.”
He looked confused, which did not befit his posh garb and drab throne. He swirled a wine glass full of blood. “How do you so swiftly assume what I am?” he asked, dodging my offer for a truce.
I rolled my eyes. “I’ve been around the block. But let me ask you more questions: Why are you here? How long have you been waiting? Why don’t you leave? Where are you getting fresh blood?”
He opened his mouth, then shut it and looked to the side. A flustered air washed over him as he gazed around like someone with dementia. I watched his struggle to answer the question burn at his soul. Vampires always love mental challenges, and I had somehow thrown the ultimate one his way off the top of my head. Unfortunately, he was getting more and more flustered, and—as it always is in the big open boss rooms—I was the only target for his potential wrath.
On that day, I learned the limits of vampiric reaction time. Despite his stature as an aged and likely experienced individual, the .50 Armor-Piercing-Incendiary-Tracer did not care as it zipped through the air at 2900 feet-per-second and turned his head to a fine red mist. His remains went limp as the wine glass clattered to the floor before he turned to dust. On any other day I might have talked him down, but not today. No unnecessary risks.
The wall to my right slid down as I reloaded. I approached the much grander 10-foot-tall steel door and beckoned my mule over from the entryway, only to remember I was alone. With a huff (which triggered the cracked rib pain again) I knocked on the door, finding it to be rather thick steel. My idea would have to wait a little longer as I cranked the latch to trigger the mechanism. I held up the Val in case of ambush, but the floor was being nice about not instantly attacking me.
What awaited me was the most gigantic room so far. The curve-vaulted cei
... keep reading on reddit ➡For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂
It really does, I swear!
She looked just like my mother.
That's what I thought when I saw her crouching in the gutter, vomiting God-knows-what into the road. The streetlights illuminated a gaunt figure with stringy blonde hair, pale skin and a huge patchwork cardigan. My mother had been a kindergarten teacher before cancer took her. She always wore bright, soft clothing like that, even on her days off.
I don’t usually approach homeless people. Maybe that makes me a bad person, but you hear all these scams about people begging then getting into a brand-new Mercedes when the night falls. Or wasting their money on booze and drugs. My mother would never have done any of those things. I think that’s why I approached her.
“Ma’am? Are you okay?” was the most stupid question I could’ve asked, but I went with it anyway. Up close, she looked a bit less like my mother. Her green eyes were darker, and she had a thin, pale scar stretching from the top of her eyebrow to the beginnings of her hairline.
“Do I look okay to you?” is something my mother would definitely have said back. My face reddened. The woman - not my mother, I tried to remember - wiped her mouth on her sleeve, as though I wasn’t there.
“Well, should I take you to see a doctor…?” Up close, she looked about as exhausted and miserable as any person I have ever seen. The bags under her eyes were heavy and dark. When she belched, I saw a couple of teeth were missing.
“I’d rather have a roof over my head. These nights are cold, you know.” She stopped and gave me a long once-over. I was wearing a thick fleece jacket, gloves, a scarf knitted by my best friend. My arms were laden with gifts bought for the festive season. My face turned even redder. I felt like a glutton under the gaze of this woman who I’d only just met.
The woman stood up and stepped closer. This close, she reeked of unwashedness and a stale something I couldn’t place. But there was something else underneath. Lavender. Beneath the dirt, she had the exact same scent as my mother’s old lavender perfume.
“Poppy Poppet, have you got a place for me to stay?” Her whisper was hoarse but kind.
Poppy Poppet. I hadn’t heard that nickname since the day my mother died.
***
I set her up in the guest room, making sure the nicest sheets were on the bed. It’s a small room, but cosy enough with room for the odd bits and bobs the woman had brought with her. Somehow, I hadn’t noticed her bag at first. It was huge, more like Santa’s sack than anything. It contained blanke
... keep reading on reddit ➡
Because she wanted to see the task manager.
Hey guys I live in California and I’m working on getting my motorcycle license. Zero experience on a motorcycle or with manual transmission. I took the motorcycle course California hosts to teach riding and to get checked off for the skills portion for the DMV.
It was a 5 hour a day, 2 day course, it was well taught but pretty jam packed and accelerated. I ended up failing the final skills test, slow speed serpentine through offset cones and slow speed tight turn.
So they were saying to stay on throttle but to ride the friction zone on the clutch for both maneuvers. It was pretty awkward for me, balancing the throttle and clutch and trying to do the delicate turns at the same time.
My bike would rev really loud mid turns, I guess I was putting too much throttle and inconsistently? And I wasn’t sure when to ease off of the clutch more during the serpentine. I would let go of the clutch after passing a cone and shoot way outside and ended missing the last couple cones.
So how exactly would you work the clutch and throttle during the slow speed serpentine? Same question with the tight turn. I’m planning to retake it, definitely wanna learn the skills to be able to ride confidently.
Appreciate any feedback.
UPDATE: I passed my test!! Thank you all for all the feedback and advice it definitely gave me the edge I needed, you guys rock
The Beginning | Wiki Page | Sixth Part | Eighth Part
Ah the Shimmerlands, the one place I have been repeatedly, religiously, indisputably told not to go, and, coincidentally, the very place I happened to be riding through. Everyone gets so hung up on magic blowing up when used, but I—clutching a semi-auto shotgun—didn’t mind that quite so much. Gods can ban guns, but they can’t take them from me here! (As a… [former?] American, I am obligated to say some variation of that phrase. Cold, dead hands, etc.)
Magic going splodey is still quite an inconvenience, however. The frustrating thing is… it’s inconsistent, kinda. If a spell works once, it will work every time, if cast in the same way. Unfortunately, the only way to test this is to put your hide on the line and cast it your damn self. If you roll a 99 or 100, congratulations! You have a spell you can use. If not, then it’s nuke-meet-face. (I am told the explosion is enough to reduce a log cabin to splinters...)
This leaves a disappointingly small list of magic that is available in non-splodey form. Vitally to me, this includes featherweight, if cast outside the Shimmerlands. This spell—while not applied to myself due to prohibitive duration—is enchanted onto every piece of equipment I’m carrying, reducing several hundred pounds of kit to about forty. Other spells relevant to me are beacon-stones and their connected compasses, which are my guides to the Tomb of Instability; and placebo-grade healing potions, which, arguably, aren’t actually magical.
The rest of the spells I either don’t know and cannot learn fast enough or can’t use outright. Next, some (1/3 or so) creatures with innate—'organic' magic as hippiemancers put it—can use their abilities. The rule of thumb on that is: If it's in the Shimmerlands, it hasn't exploded, therefore it's good. Dormant magic is all but guaranteed to last until used, then you roll the dice on whether it's splodey. And, finally, any magic item looted in the Shimmerlands works as it should… until removed from the Shimmerlands, at which point you can’t take it back in without risking you-know-what. On top of that, magic items of meaningful
... keep reading on reddit ➡'Was I a bad person? Sometimes I did do things to get the attention of my parents, but I was only a child. A lonely bullied one. I may have had a short temper, but I didn't use it for evil. The junkie that dared even try touch my sister deserved the broken arm. I even paid my dues with the 3 months in juvie I got slammed in. I don't deserve this. This fucking bullshit debt. How many more nights of this till I can pay my classes.'
Max sat numbly on a metal foldable chair. The area long since dead of the booming audience that once yelled from their rows of seats. Under his boots was the sand of the makeshift arena the organizers set in place, his boss. Speaking of the sleazy scumbag.
"Oy! The fuck yah still doin' here boy! Event over." The man spoke as one of his call girls hovered over his side. The Christian definition of sloth couldn't be enough to describe him. A gluttonous man, with sausage fingers tightly clasped under a ring on every finger, he stood on italian leather shoes. The powdery sand barely holding under his weight as his feet sunk.
"It's the end of the week and I did my required quota of matches."
Max didn't say more. His bloodied knuckles already hurt enough from his latest match to bother with the extra details. He knew the fatty knows what he wants. What he earned through blood and sweat.
"Oh yeah, your check." he chuckled. Vibrations rippled off the fat folds of his meaty neck and body. With a yelp from the woman, he firmly squeezed her ass.
"Here you go. The amount you earned."
A coffee stained envelope was tossed upon Max's lap. Checking the contents as the boss fiddled with his plaything, he was furious to find not even 2/3 of the money promised.
"Where's the rest." He asked with clenched teeth. Almost grinding them in anger.
Semi angry himself with being taken out of his horny stupor, he looked back at Max's sight. Not with bravery, but with blinding greed.
"Still in the safe. You barely made a show of that match. The crowd was bored out their minds from just watching that pathetic display of fighting."
Max wanted to argue. Every bone in his body wished to sink his fist into his chubby face. What did he know about how to fight? Had be fought for his right to sit at the school lunch table? Did he disarm prisoners trying to stab him with a shank? Does he fight everyday in underground boxing arenas to live a second life in school? Constantly plagued by college debt? NO.
Max took a deep breath. His boss was already walkin
... keep reading on reddit ➡They’re on standbi
Pilot on me!!
Nothing, he was gladiator.
EDIT: Thank you all for being so polite about a controversial topic! It was a good experience and I got some fair counter-points to think about as well. Hopefully this will lead you to experiment with the perk and see how it goes.
EDIT 2: This is about the perk, not the mod!
EDIT 3: Turns out the Battle Rifle comes with intrinsic hipfire grip!!! Yee haw!
I think's time we break a taboo with this perk, so I actually took the time to analyze it in a video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uQEnkPks1DA .
I've been chasing hipfire grip rolls for a while and I gotta say... I'm hooked. Not as a means to get optimal TTK from the hip, but rather as a primer for a shotgun shot or a sniper cleanup or a panic tool in general. I wanted to know what other pvp folks thought about it so... here I am! Have you actually gave it a shot after its third buff? Let's have a healthy discussion about it.
Transcript:
"Hipfire grip has been a joke in the community for ages but is it really as bad as we think?
What about the three buffs it received? Still nothing? Let’s think about this, in other games there are always hipfire perks and in many they’re pretty sought after. We have the typical laser sight in Battlefield or Rainbow Six: Siege; in communities like Planetside the hipfire attachments are heavily desired by some of the best players. Should Destiny truly be different? Today I’ll explain the reasons good players in other FPS games push to improve hipfire and why you should in Destiny as well.
In most games when you aim down the sights, you get bonuses: some give you better spread or bloom, better recoil, and depending on the game’s systems, it can reduce your sensitivity
Aiming down sights definitely lets you be precise. But here’s the kicker, engagements are chaotic; they can go wrong very fast. Using your sights is proactive, it’s something you consciously do whereas hipfiring is typically reactive. You get pushed and decide to cut the time it takes to ADS so that you can shoot immediately. You choose to forego those ADS bonuses in an effort to gain a time-to-kill advantage over your opponent. When you look back at gameplay footage, you’d be shocked how often this happens, so why not use a perk that offsets losing those bonuses? One quick example is how in most games, including Destiny, you strafe faster while shooting from the hip, increasing your chance to dodge a bullet here and there by throwing
... keep reading on reddit ➡Right then. The special that should have taken a week took three and is going to be continuing after chapter 140 of the main story with another 'special chapter' coming out every 10 chapters from then on.
In other news I was finally convinced to set up a patreon for this little project of mine. You wont get anything for pledging except a happy and slightly more drunk Danish student and to the rest of you don't worry. Nothing is getting locked away behind a paywall.
From what I can see and hear people have really enjoyed them but they are not doing that well in comparison to the main story. I do compel you to go check them out if you want. Otherwise Lean back and enjoy the show as we get on with chapter 137. Nicely edited of course by Bushmaster and UnwavoringGrey
ko-fi Patreon for the purpose of getting poor Danish students drunk and getting more awesome stuff made for the story
Sapphire cover art by Uwnycorn
__________________________________________________________________________________
Chapter 137: Hunger Games
“So then, pipsqueak, ready to get your ass kicked?” Glira chuckled as her crew set about adjusting her nets, Jarix looking down to Tom and Saph pleadingly.
It had been a busy few days of packing supplies and getting the Deriva Keep folk sent home. Saph had kept busy helping plan for winter as well as getting the keep back in order after the festival. It had been a few days, but they had finally gotten around to Glira and Jarix's little hunting competition. Much to her surprise though, Jarix actually seemed to be less than confident, rather unlike his usual self.
“You’re sure we can’t convince Tom to let us use the fifty?”
“Yup,” Saph replied as she was looking o
... keep reading on reddit ➡Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.
This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.
If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.
Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.
I’m selling my entire samples collection of Men's and Unisex fragrances, along with some bottles.
Ideally minimum orders of $20, as I have a limited number of mailers. US only.
Deals:
- Free shipping if you spend $40+
- 10% off if you spend $100+
- 15% off if you spend $150+
- 20% off if you spend $200+
- 25% off if you spend $250+
Payment:
PayPal (G&S or F&F) and Venmo accepted.
I’ve bought but not sold on here before, but I’m happy to share my eBay and Mercari profiles where I have 100% five stars.
Photos:
(I can take more individual photos of the ones you're buying before mailing as well if desired.)
Condition:
Most have either only been sprayed/sampled once or not at all. See spreadsheet for full details including the notes in each fragrance:
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1iZdWkLL7ktmTVbx2KpNAogudbJxrv8Nt3k5C8ppVWxU/edit?usp=sharing
Thanks!
Available:
Acqua di Parma Vaniglia EDP 1ml sample vial $3
Acqua di Parma Blu Mediterraneo Arancia di Capri 1ml sample vial $2
Acqua di Parma Colonia Club 1ml sample vial $2
Acqua di Parma Blu Mediterraneo Ginepro di Sardegna 1ml sample vial $3
Acqua di Parma Blu Mediterraneo Bergamotto di Calabria 1ml sample vial $2
Adidas Team Five Special Edition 3.4 oz (100ml) - full size $4
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Amouage Reflection Man 0.7ml sample vial $2
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Armani Armani Code Absolu 3ml $6
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Aromi Alpha Male 0.11oz solid cologne sample jar $2
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Aromi Urban Gent 0.11oz solid cologne sampl
I won't be doing that today!
This morning, my 4 year old daughter.
Daughter: I'm hungry
Me: nerves building, smile widening
Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.
She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.
Thank you all for listening.
There hasn't been a post all year!
You take away their little brooms
It was about a weak back.
When I got home, they were still there.
What did 0 say to 8 ?
" Nice Belt "
So What did 3 say to 8 ?
" Hey, you two stop making out "
[Removed]
Where ever you left it 🤷♀️🤭
