Got a job at a potato chip factory. On top of salary they said I could pick any flavor chip off the shelf once a month.
They prided themselves in their stock options.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Mar 04 2021
Correct me if Iβm wrong, but due to the ongoing pandemic, would it be smart to stay at least 6ft away from the chips and dip when visiting a Mexican restaurant?
You know, Salsa Distancing.
π︎ 6
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︎ Feb 24 2021
What do you call a monk that loves chips?
π︎ 20
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︎ Feb 10 2021
A man walks into a fish and chip shop with a salmon under his arm...
Man: Do you do fishcakes?
Fishmonger: no, I'm afraid not, sorry.
Man: Ah, that's a shame - it's his birthday today
π︎ 10
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︎ Mar 12 2021
Chip
π︎ 11
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︎ Feb 01 2021
Get it? Cuz Pringles are chips?
π︎ 13
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︎ Jan 31 2021
I visited a monastery the other day and as I walked past the kitchen I saw a man frying chips. I asked him "Are you the friar?"
He replied "No, I'm the chip monk..."
π︎ 583
π
︎ Dec 12 2020
What sound does a tortilla chip make when sneezing?
π︎ 20
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︎ Feb 07 2021
A monastery in Las Vegas kept getting chips in their donation box
It got so frustrating they decided to hire a chipmunk
π︎ 10
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︎ Feb 11 2021
I heard the government was putting chips inside of people.
Well mine better be sour cream and onion
π︎ 13
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︎ Feb 03 2021
What did the corn chips say to the thief?
π︎ 11
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︎ Jan 04 2021
I need a pun about chips for a Christmas gift
So my brother is super hard to buy for because my mom buys him EVERYTHING, literally. This kid has every toy, game console, video game, movie, funko pop, t-shirt, etc to ever exist.
My sister and I decided to buy him chips for Christmas. I got jalapeno cheddar cheetos, a few snack bags of spicy chips, and a can of pringles. I'm going to wrap them individually and put them in a stocking.
I would like to add a card with a pun or joke about chips to at least make this (admittedly low effort) gift funny.
π︎ 2
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︎ Dec 22 2020
I was hungry so I ate all my chips.
Everyone else at the poker game was not impressed.
π︎ 16
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︎ Jan 23 2021
I got my chips before I put my money into the vending machine
I guess it's out of order.
π︎ 21
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︎ Dec 30 2020
I visited a monastery and as I walked past the kitchen I saw a man frying chips...
'Are you the friar? ' I asked him.
'No, I am the chip monk' he replied.
Edit : Holy crap ! More than 1K updoots for a silly joke ? Thanks guys ! I am not sure whether to be proud or ashamed of myself.
π︎ 3k
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︎ Jul 21 2020
I just baked some fresh chocolate chip cookies
π︎ 11
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︎ Sep 19 2020
What do you call chips that you can catch?
π︎ 9
π
︎ Dec 20 2020
What's a dog's favorite kind of potato chip?
π︎ 6
π
︎ Dec 11 2020
There was a fight in the fish and chip shop
π︎ 3
π
︎ Nov 24 2020
chips
π︎ 168
π
︎ Aug 06 2020
Last night my wife says "Honey will you go get us some tortilla chips and cheese?"
I looked deep into her eyes and said
"I'm nacho delivery service. "
π︎ 15
π
︎ Nov 11 2020
What brand of chips is slower than Internet Explorer?
π︎ 8
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︎ Nov 20 2020
Did you hear about the fight at the fish and chip shop?
Five fish got battered and a bunch of chips were a-salted.
π︎ 102
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︎ Aug 23 2020
Of course, french fries are far too posh for us, we only do chips!
π︎ 22
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︎ Sep 28 2020
The other day I was on the dock talking to two of my neighborsβ¦ One of them had a cooler full of beers and snacksβ¦ Pulling out a beer pops the top and opening a bag of chips, he says βMy wifeβs an angel
I said, βyouβre lucky β mine is still aliveβ¦β
π︎ 5
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︎ Nov 21 2020
My grandsonβs dad joke ( very proud grandfather) What kind of chips do you get at the airport?
π︎ 39
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︎ Sep 05 2020
What do ducks love with their tortilla chips?
π︎ 38
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︎ Sep 13 2020
I hear the givernment is putting chips in people.
π︎ 11
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︎ Oct 07 2020
Every morning when I am done getting my 2 year old ready for school I call her a Canadian potato chip.
Because sheβs all dressed.
π︎ 12
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︎ Sep 29 2020
In Vegas, people can tithe by dropping casino chips in the offertory.
At the end of the weekend there is a Brother that goes around to all the casinos to cash them out and make a deposit.
Heβs the Chip Monk.
π︎ 8
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︎ Sep 01 2020
I told my wife βHoney, thereβs a chip in our new bowls!β She was not as impressed.
π︎ 16
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︎ Aug 11 2020
I thought I dipped my tortilla chip into a bowl of cheese sauce, but it turned out to be honey mustard.
It was a queso mistaken identity.
π︎ 52
π
︎ Aug 15 2020
I heard the government is going to put chips inside people with Covid vaccines...
π︎ 17
π
︎ Sep 23 2020
Mashed up dates, chocolate chips, peanut butter, granola, almonds....delicious homemade granola bars
π︎ 53
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︎ Jun 12 2020
I love working at the chip factory...
But my boss really Lays in on me, and it Ruffles my feathers
π︎ 5
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︎ Oct 05 2020
My husband and I were eating chips when our toddler requested one. So he gave her a chip and she walked away.
A few minutes later she came back and my husband wasnβt paying attention so I said βgive her another, dad.β And he responded with βwhatβs wrong with the dad sheβs got?β
π︎ 21
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︎ Aug 31 2020
A man walks into a fish and chip shop with a cod under his arm...
He says to the bloke behind the counter,
βDo you do fishcakes?β
The man behind the counter nods his head and smiles.
βYeah mate.β
Customer points to the cod under his arm.
βBetter make him one then mate, itβs his birthday.β
π︎ 47
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︎ Aug 07 2020
What did the potato chip bag say to the battery?
Iβm Frito Lay if youβre Eveready.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Aug 07 2020
What does Pac-Man eat with his chips?
π︎ 10k
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︎ Mar 22 2019
I once ate a hundred chips in one sitting
Thatβs how I got banned from the casino
π︎ 15
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︎ Aug 04 2020
I was heating up chip dip when I spilled some on my feet.
I guess you could say i had toasty-toes.
π︎ 8
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︎ Aug 16 2020
A drunk man eating chips wanders into a monastery
While wandering around he bumps into a old man in robes cooking.
With a grin the drunk man asks βAre you the fish friar?β
βNo brotherβ he replied βIβm the chip monkβ
π︎ 4
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︎ Aug 19 2020
A man walks into a bar and orders helicopter flavor chips.
The barman replies βsorry mate we only do plainβ
π︎ 10
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︎ Jul 28 2020
I have a farmer friend who heats his milk products to 212 degrees Fahrenheit using cow chips...
Yep. It's called pasture-ized milk.
π︎ 6
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︎ Jul 26 2020
What do you call a monkey that loves chips?
π︎ 9
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︎ Sep 28 2020
A hungry traveller stopped at a monastery and was taken to the kitchen where there was a brother frying chips.
"Are you the friar?" he asked.
The brother replied, "No, I'm the chip monk".
π︎ 46
π
︎ Aug 20 2020
Did you hear that there was a big fight down at the fish and chips shop
The fish got battered and the chips got assaulted
π︎ 8
π
︎ Sep 24 2020
Did you hear about the fight outside the chip shop the other day?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Sep 24 2020
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