Carpe(t) Diem!
πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DurrVinci
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2019
🚨︎ report
My uncle once had a 24-hour epileptic episode.

Now that's what I call seizing the day.

πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jazst
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Not sure if this has been posted here before. I found it on Facebook cause I suck.
πŸ‘︎ 474
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Shiny_Shaymin18
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2018
🚨︎ report
My dad's fishing jokes are appalling.

I was telling my dad about my JAWS essay that is due in a couple of days and this is the conversation that followed.

Me: I'm writing out my JAWS essay.

Dad: Ok sounds a bit fishy.

Me:That's a terrible joke.

Dad: Hook line and sinker

ME: Stahp. I can't handle the dad jokes anymore.

Dad: Holy mackerel he's growing up

Me: You seriously can't make anymore up.

Dad: I'm having a whale of a time.

Me: Really?

Dad: Yes

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dropboy6
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2014
🚨︎ report
There’s no time like today to do the things you love. For me, that thing is fishing.

Carp diem!

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/garboooge
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2019
🚨︎ report
Out-dadded by Mom

I always say "sieze the carp" because I'm hilarious. Sent my mom the following text, letting her know I was out because it was such a nice day:

>Me: Playing disc golf.

>Mom: :). K

>Me: Figured I'd size the carp while I could.

>Mom: That's a Diem good idea

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/outfromtheashes
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2015
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.