Carol Nugent Puns

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

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5582. Geosystems Core, 1st Edition: Robert W. Christopherson &, Stephen F. Cunha & Charles E. Thomsen

5583. Business Essentials, 8th Canadian Edition: Ronald J. Ebert &, Ricky W. Griffin &, Frederick A. Starke

5584. CompTIA Security+ Get Certified Get Ahead: SY0-501 Study Guide, 4th Edition: Darril Gibson

5585. Mathematics for Physics: An Illustrated Handbook, 1st Edition: Adam Marsh

5586. Principles of Chemistry: A Molecular Approach, 3rd Edition: Nivaldo J. Tro

5587. The Only Options Trading Book You’ll Ever Need: Russell Allen Stultz

5588. Concepts of Genetics, 3rd Edition: Robert Brooker

5589. Financial Accounting Theory, 7th Edition: William R. Scott

5590. Particle Image Velocimetry: A Practical Guide, 3rd Edition: Markus Raffel &, Christian E. Willert &, Fulvio Scarano &, Christian J. Kähler & Steve T. Wereley

5591. DeVita, Hellman, and Rosenberg's Cancer: Principles & Practice of Oncology, 11th Edition: Vincent T. DeVita &, Steven A. Rosenberg & Theodore S. Lawrence

5592. Machine Elements in Mechanical Design, 6th Edition: Robert L. Mott &, Edward M. Vavrek & Jyhwen Wang

5593. Molecular Cell Biology, 8th Edition: Harvey Lodish,& Arnold Berk,& Chris A. Kaiser,& Monty Krieger, & Anthony Bretscher, & Hidde Ploegh, & Angelika Amon,

5594. Managing Operations Across the Supply Chain, 3rd Edition: Morgan Swink &, Steven Melnyk &, M. Bixby Cooper &, Janet L. Hartley

5595. Foundations of Nursing Research, 7th Edition: Rose Marie Nieswiadomy &, Catherine Bailey

5596. Expert Oracle Application Express, 2nd Edition: Doug Gault &, Dimitri Gielis & Martin DSouza &, Roel Hartman &, Raj Mattamal

5597. Introduction to Econometrics, Update global 3rd Edition: James H. Stock & Mark W. Watson

5598. Industrial Microbiology: An Introduction, 1st Edition: Michael J. Waites &, Neil L. Morgan &, John S. Rockey &, Gary Higton

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

Do your worst!

How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?

Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.

But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"

Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

And now I’m cannelloni

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

But that’s comparing apples to oranges

And boy are my arms legs.

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

BamBOO!

They’re on standbi

A play on words.

Calcium, nickel, neon

My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.

Put it on my bill

Pilot on me!!

Christopher Walken

Nothing, he was gladiator.

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

Or would that be too forward thinking?

At work, I have a workstation.

edit: cheers u/cheer_up_richard

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9451. Transcultural Nursing: Assessment and Intervention, 7th Edition: Joyce Newman Giger

9452. Ethical, Legal, and Professional Issues in the Practice of Marriage and Family Therapy, Updated 5th Edition: Allen P Wilcoxon & Theodore P. Remley & Samuel T. Gladding

9453. Run, Don't Walk: The Curious and Chaotic Life of a Physical Therapist Inside Walter Reed Army Med ical Center, 1st Edition: Adele Levine

9454. Aging and Older Adulthood, 4th Edition: Joan T. Erber

9455. Managerial Accounting: Tools for Business Decision Making, 8th Edition: Jerry J. Weygandt & Paul D. Kimmel & Donald E. Kieso

9456. Assembly Language for x86 Processors, 7th Edition: Kip R. Irvine

9457. Exploring Research, 9th Edition, Global Edition: Neil J. Salkind

9458. Occupational Therapy Essentials for Clinical Competence, 2nd Edition: Karen Jacobs & Nancy MacRae & Karen Sladyk & Karen Jacobs & Nancy MacRae

9459. Financial Microeconometrics: A Research Methodology in Corporate Finance and Accounting, 1st Edition: Marek Gruszczyński

9460. Imagining Indianness: Cultural Identity and Literature, 1st Edition: Diana Dimitrova & Thomas de Bruijn

9461. Lehne's Pharmacology for Nursing Care, 10th Edition: Jacqueline Burchum & Laura Rosenthal

9462. Using SPSS for Windows and Macintosh, 7th Edition: Samuel B. Green & Neil J. Salkind

9463. Clinical Assessment and Diagnosis in Social Work Practice, 3rd Edition: Jacqueline Corcoran & Joseph Walsh

9464. Landscapes and Landforms of Eastern Canada, 1st Edition: Olav Slaymaker & Norm Catto

9465. Life Cycle Nutrition: An Evidence-Based Approach, 2nd Edition: Sari Edelstein

9466. Electronic Circuits with MATLAB, PSpice, and Smith Chart, 1st Edition: Won Y. Yang & Jaekwon Kim & Kyung W. Park & Donghyun Baek

9467. Tests & Measurement for People Who (Think They) Hate Tests & Measurement, 3rd Edition: Neil J. Salkind

9468. The Soils of the USA, 1st Edition: L.T. West

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8743. Disease Gene Identification: Methods and Protocols, 2nd Edition: Johanna K. DiStefano

8744. Statistical Aspects of the Microbiological Examination of Foods, 3rd Edition: Basil Jarvis

8745. Revel for Social Problems, 14th Edition: Stanley Eitzen & Maxine Baca Zinn & Kelly Ei Smith

8746. Fundamentals of Human Resource Management: Pearson New International Edition, 3rd Edition: Gary Dessler

8747. Economics Today: The Micro View, 18th Edition: Roger LeRoy Miller

8748. Employment Law for Business, 8th Edition: Dawn Bennett-Alexander & Laura Hartman

8749. Surgical Exposures in Orthopaedics: The Anatomic Approach, 5th Edition: Stanley Hoppenfeld & Piet de Boer & Richard Buckley

8750. Project Management in Construction, 7th Edition: Sidney Levy

8751. Financial and Managerial Accounting, 7th Edition: John Wild & Ken Shaw & Barbara Chiappetta

8752. Handbook of Plant Disease Identification and Management, 1st Edition: Balaji Aglave

8753. Ubuntu Unleashed 2019 Edition: Covering 18.04, 18.10, 19.04, 13th Edition: Matthew Helmke

8754. Handbook of Insulin Therapies, 1st Edition: Winston Crasto & Janet Jarvis & Melanie J. Davies

8755. Python for Programmers: with Big Data and Artificial Intelligence Case Studies, 1st Edition: Paul J. Deitel & Harvey Deitel

8756. Medical Ethics: Accounts of Ground-Breaking Cases, 7th Edition: Gregory Pence

8757. Human Resource Management, 13th Edition: Gary Dessler

8758. The Biology and Therapeutic Application of Mesenchymal Cells, 2 Volume Set, 1st Edition: Kerry Atkinson

8759. Computer Security Fundamentals, 3rd Edition: William Chuck Easttom

8760. Hendee's Radiation Therapy Physics, 4th Edition: Todd Pawlicki & Daniel J. Scanderbeg & George Starkschall

8761. Nutrient Delivery, 1st Edition: Alexandru Grumezescu

8762. Technology Entrepreneurship: Taking Innovation to the Marketplace, 2nd Edition: Thomas N. Duening & Robert A. Hisrich & Michael A. Lechte

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2749. Real-Life BPMN, 3rd Edition: Jakob Freund & Bernd Rücker

2750. Reading the World: Ideas That Matter, 3rd Edition: Michael Austin

2751. Quantitative Methods for Business, 13th Edition: David R. Anderson & Dennis J. Sweeney& Thomas A. Williams& Jeffrey D. Camm & James J. Cochran

2752. Qualitative Research & Evaluation Methods, 4th Edition: Michael Quinn Patton

2753. Public Policymaking, 8th Edition: James E. Anderson

2754. Psychology: The Briefer Course: William James

2755. Professional Nursing: Concepts & Challenges, 8th Edition: Beth Black

2756. Prioritization, Delegation, and Assignment, 4th Edition: Linda A. LaCharity & Candice K. Kumagai

2757. Persuasion : Social Influence And Compliance Gaining, 5Th Edition: Robert H. Gass & John S. Seiter

2758. Our Origins: Discovering Physical Anthropology, 4th Edition: Clark Spencer Larsen

2759. Once Upon a Time: A Short History of Fairy Tale, 1st Eition: Marina Warner

2760. NYSTCE EAS Educating All Students Test (201) Secrets Study Guide: NYSTCE Exam Secrets Test Prep Team

2761. Nutrition for Healthy Living Updated with 2015-2020 Dietary Guidelines for Americans, 4th Edition: Wendy Schiff

2762. Nurse's Pocket Guide: Diagnoses, Prioritized Interventions and Rationales, 14th Edition: Marilynn E. Doenges & Mary Frances Moorhouse& Alice C. Murr

2763. Natural Hazards: Earth's Processes as Hazards, Disasters, and Catastrophes, 4th Edition: Edward A. Keller & Duane E. DeVecchio

2764. Mosby's Exam Review for Computed Tomography, 2nd Edition: Daniel N. DeMaio

2765. Mosby's Diagnostic and Laboratory Test Reference, 13th Edition: Kathleen Deska Pagana & Timothy J. Pagana & Theresa N Pagana

2766. Microbiology: A Systems Approach, 5th Edition: Marjorie Kelly Cowan

2767. Media, Crime, and Criminal Justice, 5th Edition: Ray Surette

2768. MCSA Guide to Installation, Storage, and Compute with Microsoft Windows Server2016, Exam 70-740, 1st Edition:

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3104. Kinematics, Dynamics, and Design of Machinery, 3rd Edition: Kenneth J. Waldron & Gary L. Kinzel & Sunil K. Agrawal

3105. Universe, 10th Edition: Roger Freedman & Robert Geller & William J. Kaufmann

3106. Fundamentals of Nursing - E-Book: Active Learning for Collaborative Practice, 1st Edition: Barbara L Yoost & Lynne R Crawford

3107. Everything's an Argument with Readings, 7th Edition: Andrea A. Lunsford & John J. Ruszkiewicz & Keith Walters

3108. Computer Forensics: Investigating File and Operating Systems, Wireless Networks, and Storage (CHFI), 2nd Edition: EC-Council

3109. Theatre as Human Action: An Introduction to Theatre Arts, 2nd Edition: Thomas S. Hischak

3110. Community Psychology: Linking Individuals and Communities, 3rd Edition: Bret Kloos , Jean Hill , Elizabeth Thomas , Abraham Wandersman and Maurice J. Elias

3111. Pathophysiology of Heart Disease: A Collaborative Project of Medical Students and Faculty, Sixth North American Edition:Leonard S. Lilly

3112. Criminal Justice A Brief Introduction, 12th Edition: Frank Schmalleger

3113. Introduction to Management Science: A Modeling and Case Studies Approach with Spreadsheets, 5th Edition: Frederick S Hillier

3114. Classroom Management That Works: Research-Based Strategies for Every Teacher, 1st Edition: Dr Robert J Marzano & Jana S Marzano & Debra J Pickering

3115. The Six Sigma Handbook, 4th Edition: Thomas Pyzdek & Paul A. Keller

3116. Psychology in Modules, 12th Edition: David G. Myers & C. Nathan DeWall

3117. GOVT, 10th Edition: Edward I. Sidlow & Beth Henschen

3118.GOVT 9 (New, Engaging Titles from 4LTR Press), 9th Edition: Edward I. Sidlow & Beth Henschen

3119. Strategic Management Competitiveness and Globalisation, 6th Asia-Pacific Edition: Dallas Hanson & Michael Hitt & Duane Ireland & Robert E Hoskisson

3120. American Government: Institutions and Policies, 16th Edition: James Q. Wilson

3121. Concise

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1271. Christianity and the Political Order: Conflict, Cooptation, and Cooperation (Theology in Global Perspectives): Kenneth Himes

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1273. Essential Environment: The Science Behind the Stories, 5th edition: Jay Withgott & Matthew Laposata

1274. Motifs: An Introduction to French, Enhanced (World Languages), 6th Edition: Kimberly Jansma & Margaret Ann Kassen

1275. Organizational Behavior, 10th Edition: Robert Kreitner & Angelo Kinicki

1276. Training for Sports Speed and Agility: An Evidence-Based Approach: Paul Gamble

1277. Strength and Conditioning for Team Sports: Sport-Specific Physical Preparation for High Performance, 2nd edition: Paul Gamble

1278. Chemistry for Today: General, Organic, and Biochemistry, 8th ed: Spencer L. Seager & Michael R. Slabaugh

1279. Epistemology: An Anthology, 2nd Edition: Ernest Sosa & Jaegwon Kim & Jeremy Fantl & Matthew McGrath

1280. All You Need to Know About the Music Business, 9th edition: Donald S. Passman

1281. Fundamentals of Investing, 13th Edition: Scott B. Smart & Lawrence J. Gitman & Michael D. Joehnk

1282. Marketing: An Introduction, 13th Edition: Gary Armstrong & Philip T. Kotler

1283. The Norton Anthology of American Literature, Volume-1, 8th edition: Nina Baym & Robert S. Levine

1284. College Physics: Paul Peter Urone & Hinrichs Roger

1285. Elementary Statistics (13th Edition): Mario F. Triola

1286. Supply Chain Management: Strategy, Planning, and Operation, 6th edition: Sunil Chopra & Peter Meindl

1287. Practical Decision Making in Health Care Ethics: Cases, Concepts, and the Virtue of Prudence, Fourth Edition: Raymond J. Devettere

1288. The Historian's Toolbox: A Student's Guide to the Theory and Craft of History, 3rd Edition: Robert C Williams

1289. Looking At Movies: An Introduction to Film, 5th edition: Richard Barsam & Dave Monahan

1290. Th