Bobby Convey Puns

Everything changed the day that Jarret Ray killed himself.

He had been a youtube star, an internet darling, and his life had been a tv show since he picked up a guitar.

The video of an eight-year-old Jarret Ray learning his cords is still on his memorial channel. The sight of him playing beside his grandad, the old man smiling and cackling as the young boy devoured his lessons, is tear-jerking. People talk about how "You could just tell So in So was happy because it was written all over his face." Well, it was true in this case. Bobby Ray, Jarret's grandad, was truly happy when he watched his grandson play those first halting cords from the chair beside him. He'd tell Jarret ten years later, his hands and muscles withered from cancer, that teaching him to play had been his proudest achievement.

"Police have found another apparent suicide in the Little Brein today. This brings the death toll into the thousands with numbers in the millions expected by the end of the day."

I looked up from the tea I'd been making and sighed. All this...all this because some stupid tart couldn't tell when she was supposed to be ashamed. I had been watching the reports come in all day. After the video had gone viral, it was all anyone could do to keep up with the death toll. All this over a song, I thought. All this because someone wrote a song.

But it was more than a song, wasn't it?

He'd won his fifth-grade talent show, his sixth grade, and his seventh grade as well. By the time he was in eighth grade, the administration had simply let him close the show. Every year he wrote a new song just for the occasion, and many of them made their way onto his albums after he was discovered. During the interviews they did for the documentary, his classmates spoke about him with tears in their eyes. They said there would never be anyone like Jarret, that when Jarret sang, it was like he was singing just for you.

Like he was the only other person in the world.

"The numbers are only now starting to solidify. Seven-hundred and fifty thousand deaths worldwide with another five million expected by the end of the day. This is a global crisis, and the numbers are only just beginning to come together. Of the nearly seven and a half million people worldwide who watched the video, only those reported have been discovered dead. Which begs the question, when will the other's surface?"

I had to watch the news on my old cable tv. I had turned off the router and modem hours ago. I couldn't ri

Game Information

Game Title: Chorus

Platforms:

• PC (Dec 3, 2021)
• Xbox Series X/S (Dec 3, 2021)
• PlayStation 5 (Dec 3, 2021)
• Google Stadia (Dec 3, 2021)
• Xbox One (Dec 3, 2021)
• PlayStation 4 (Dec 3, 2021)

Trailers:

• Chorus - 101 Trailer
• CHORUS - Gamescom Vision Trailer [Official] [ESRB]
• CHORUS - Gamescom Gameplay Teaser [Official]
• CHORUS - Announce Trailer [Official]

Developer: Deep Silver Fishlabs

Publisher: Deep Silver

Review Aggregator:

OpenCritic - 73 average - 45% recommended - 32 reviews

Critic Reviews

Console Creatures - Bobby Pashalidis - Recommended

>Chorus has some interesting ideas that the genre sorely needs but the dogfights in space can only go so far and generally drag the rest of the experience down.

Digital Trends - Otto Kratky - 2 / 5 stars

>Chorus' stellar space combat is brought down by a myriad of design choices that range from frustrating to outright annoying.

Eurogamer - Kaan Serin - No Recommendation / Blank

>The combat is the highlight, frantic and cinematic, but Chorus' open-world narrative ambitions let it down.

FingerGuns - Toby Andersen - 7 / 10

>Chorus shines in its exceptionally fun flight chops and smooth handling. Dogfighting in space never felt so responsive or satisfying and the backdrops can be stunning. However its ambitious, heavy story and unsympathetic heroine will leave some cold, some confused, and others simply bored.

**[GameOnAUS]

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

For those of you without access to Espn+ articles, Bobby Marks and Kevin Pelton wrote an article titled "Three realistic trade options for Philadelphia 76ers' Ben Simmons: Hint, there are no top 25 players."

TL;DR

• Kyrie only "All-NBA-type player in play right now"
• Brandon Ingram: "Ingram might be one of the best talents available, but his skill set duplicates a lot of the value Tobias Harris provides operating 1-on-1 from the wing."
• Sabonis (lol): "Simmons to Indiana, Sabonis and LeVert to Sacramento and De'Aaron Fox to the 76ers works" (Marks).
  (LOL x2) "Pacers can redirect guard Caris LeVert to a team such as the Cleveland Cavaliers, and the 76ers would get back Collin Sexton and Cedi Osman."
  " I'd probably rather have Sabonis, T.J. Warren and salary filler from Indiana " (Pelton)
• McCollum + first round picks:
  Blazers "owe the Chicago Bulls a first-round draft pick that is lottery protected in the next seven years, the Trail Blazers would need to alter the protection in the pick owed in order to send out additional firsts. For example, Portland can take the huge risk and leave their 2022 first-round pick unprotected and send Philadelphia a 2024 and 2026 first in the deal."

* * *

Full text:

>Three realistic trade options for Philadelphia 76ers' Ben Simmons: Hint, there are no top 25 players.
>
>Bobby Marks and Kevin Pelton
>
>After Friday's news that the Philadelphia 76ers are becoming more engaged on multiple fronts in talks centered on trading Ben Simmons, Bobby Marks and Kevin Pelton discuss the options available for the Sixers and their All-Star guard.
>
>Marks: Kevin, the Simmons trade chatter has been quiet until recently, when ESPN's Adrian Wojnarowski and Zach Lowe reported that the 76ers have become aggressive in trying to assemble two- and three-team deals to land a top-25 player.
>
>The momentum in trade talks is reflective of 84% of NBA players becoming trade-eligible starting on Wednesday, the first day most free agents who signed a contract this offseason can be traded. Philadelphia is still drawing a line in the sand when it comes to trying to acquire an All-NBA type player. How realistic is that?
>
>Pelton: Given that the report also states the Sixers have been told All-NBA guard Damian Lillard is off-limits in conversations with the Portland Trail Blazers and interim general manager Joe Cronin, I don't see who that player is.
>
>If we look at ESPN's

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

The doctor says it terminal.

Do your worst!

This post is a follow up to the one I made last week called “What We Should be Looking for in Week 3 performances”. In that thread, I covered the same 4 players and wrote about what signs for improvements we should look for outside of just pure stats. I was not able to make Part 2 of the first post which included Saquon, J Rob, and Kittle. I was thinking of making this a series for each week considering it did spark a decent amount of conversation. Would you guys be interested in that? Anyways, back to football!

What a disgustingly, amazingly, awfully, great week we had. Lots of studs proving their worth, probably more duds making us question our loyalty. Week 3 is behind us and it feels like we have infinitely more insight on teams compared to last week… unless your player got injured. The key focuses this week were CEH, Zeke, Chase, and Bobby Trees, due to their unexpected starts to the season. What a week to dive into these players.

There is a tl;dr for each section because I know I wrote way too much.

CEH: If it were not for half of CEH owners benching him this week, they would probably have the biggest grin on their face right now. I do not think that game could have gone any better for CEH fantasy owners from a holistic point of view. Last week, we talked about CEH’s game losing fumble and how, more than anything, we need to see the team and coaching staff have faith in CEH. They cannot avoid him on the field or freeze him out of the game. He had not been performing well in both fantasy or football so it must have felt like everyone was against him and we were looking for a fiery performance from him. This man really pushed his team and coaches to the limit this week, fumbling in the first quarter of the game on the Chargers 29-yard line. That was 3 straight drives the chiefs ended with a turnover and 2nd game in a row CEH has fumbled the ball. Up until that turnover, CEH was balling that drive.

After two chiefs mistakes the previous drives, they leaned on CEH to change the dynamic of the game and let the team calm down. This was exactly what we were looking for. He had 3 straight runs for 18 yards combined before coming back into the game on his 7-yard run before fumbling. Although the Chargers defense is much more equipped to deal with a passing offense, CEH still ran pretty well this week and showed there is good enough talent within him to succeed. After the turnover, things felt pretty gloomy for CEH owners as they expected him to get b

How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?

Mathematical puns makes me number

Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.

But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.

We told her she can lean on us for support. Although, we are going to have to change her driver's license, her height is going down by a foot. I don't want to go too far out on a limb here but it better not be a hack job.

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

He lost May

Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"

Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

And now I’m cannelloni

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

But that’s comparing apples to oranges

And boy are my arms legs.

Put it on my bill

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

BamBOO!

Everything changed the day that Jarret Ray killed himself.

He had been a youtube star, an internet darling, and his life had been a tv show since he picked up a guitar.

The video of an eight-year-old Jarret Ray learning his cords is still on his memorial channel. The sight of him playing beside his grandad, the old man smiling and cackling as the young boy devoured his lessons, is tear-jerking. People talk about how "You could just tell So in So was happy because it was written all over his face." Well, it was true in this case. Bobby Ray, Jarret's grandad, was truly happy when he watched his grandson play those first halting cords from the chair beside him. He'd tell Jarret ten years later, his hands and muscles withered from cancer, that teaching him to play had been his proudest achievement.

"Police have found another apparent suicide in the Little Brein today. This brings the death toll into the thousands with numbers in the millions expected by the end of the day."

I looked up from the tea I'd been making and sighed. All this...all this because some stupid tart couldn't tell when she was supposed to be ashamed. I had been watching the reports come in all day. After the video had gone viral, it was all anyone could do to keep up with the death toll. All this over a song, I thought. All this because someone wrote a song.

But it was more than a song, wasn't it?

He'd won his fifth-grade talent show, his sixth grade, and his seventh grade as well. By the time he was in eighth grade, the administration had simply let him close the show. Every year he wrote a new song just for the occasion, and many of them made their way onto his albums after he was discovered. During the interviews they did for the documentary, his classmates spoke about him with tears in their eyes. They said there would never be anyone like Jarret, that when Jarret sang, it was like he was singing just for you.

Like he was the only other person in the world.

"The numbers are only now starting to solidify. Seven-hundred and fifty thousand deaths worldwide with another five million expected by the end of the day. This is a global crisis, and the numbers are only just beginning to come together. Of the nearly seven and a half million people worldwide who watched the video, only those reported have been discovered dead. Which begs the question, when will the other's surface?"

I had to watch the news on my old cable tv. I had turned off the router and modem hours ago. I couldn't ri