My son might not be the best roofer in the world
They said it would be a the best Superbowl ever!!
I think the best web designers in the world might be
Wanting to impress my son at the zoo today, I revealed to him, "Used to be best friends with a giraffe, but we had a falling out." Puzzled, he asked, "What happened?" I shook my head, "I don't know really, but I felt..."
"He was always looking down on me!"
If Ben Franklin were still alive today, what would he be best known for?
I’m a delivery driver that delivers bread products, whilst on my round today a gentleman dropped this on me.....”looks like you have the best job” he says, “why is that?” I ask, because you must be loaded with dough!!!
Justice is a dish best served cold, if it were served warm jt would be justwater.
The best pen ever made will be the second to last ever made...
Because it would be penultimate.
They say one in four people are homosexual, which is weird because I have three best friends, all guys. Makes me wonder which one of us would be gay.
I hope It's Paul. He's cute.
Know what the best serial killer would be?
Suspense. people can say "oh no the suspense is killing me" then we both laugh before i stab them.
Out of all the inventions in the last 100 years, the dry erase board has to be the best one.
There should be a yearly award for best new comic book.
Call it the Stan Lee Cup.
This, no joke, might be the best pun I’ve ever read
There should be a cooking show to find the best chef from Thailand.
Call it ... Thai Masters!
Did you hear? There’s going to be a movie about the best shoes in the world!
It’s going to be a feeture film!
Might be the best pun I’ve ever read
What’s the best side of a lion to be on?
A friend of mine once told me that the best superpower would be the ability to detect the presence of Indian bread.
I said “That’s naan-sense!”
It’s easy to be the best tavern beneath sea level...
...that’s a really low bar.
I just found out I am going to be a dad so I need to be prepared. Which are the best dad jokes you know?
If you want to be the best mortician...
you're going to face stiff competition
The best restrooms can be found inside of PNC Bank branches
You can 'PNC' what happens next
My best friend keeps telling me to “cheer up man. It could be a lot worse, you could be stuck in an underground hole filled with water”
Compilations of a boxers best knockouts could just be called "[Boxer name] greatest hits"
This'll be the best Christmas of 2018
My ex-best friend used to be really nice to me, but ever since they found out I have flat feet, they've been mean to me and bullying me over it.
They're my arch-nemesis now.
Naming your kid Eugene jr. would be one of the best dad jokes
You'd be truly passing down your genes.
2020 will be the best year
We will see things so clearly
I may not be the best guitarist
I really wanna be the very best, and I already caught a store..
Now I just need to catch a mall.
One of the best ways to be taken seriously...
is to be related to Liam Neeson.
My kids wanted to wear their princess dresses to a Disneyworld park, but didn't know which park would be best...
... I told them Epcot, so they would wear their dresses to the ball.
When the kidnapper said he'd never let me get Stockholm syndrome, I knew we were going to be best friends.
Elon Musk sending his Tesla in to space will probably be the best car launch ever.
I bet his competitors will be annoyed at how much they need to lift their game.
What's the best animal to be when you're cold?
The best kind of driver would be a wreckless one
I used to be best friends with someone tall, but we stopped hanging out a few years ago.
I just couldn't get over how he always looked down at me.
Tom Brady may be the best QB in NFL history...
But that subject is very deflatable.
If Peter Frampton was a bodybuilder his best song would be "Baby I love your whey"
You would think the best place to have an "Accident Free" sign would be...
...at an auto repair shop. XD
Justice is a dish best served cold, if it were served warm it would be justwater
Justice is best served cold. If it were served warm, it would be justwater.
If peanuts are the best, what would be the second best?
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