I thought I had found the best optometrist southwest of Alaska...

But it turned out it was an optical Aleutian.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/alficles
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 08 2021
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My wife tried to get me interested in this documentary about Alaska and its people.

I'm just not Inuit.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 21
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MistakesTasteGreat
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 25 2020
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A fella from Alaska moved to San Diego and asked how he'd summerize his car

I told him four wheels, a seat and an engine

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/dirty_boris
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 18 2020
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TIL: A thousand years ago, a group of Russian explorers tried to sail into Alaska, but failed.

They couldn’t get their Bering Strait.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 06 2020
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I took my kids to Alaska to learn about the local culture

But they just weren't that Inuit.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/patentpunk
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 13 2020
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So what if I'm not part of a culturally similar indigenous peoples inhabiting the Arctic regions of Greenland, Canada and Alaska that speaks a language that is part of the Eskimo–Aleut family.

I could try harder to be, but I guess I'm just not Inuit.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/shumumazzu
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 19 2020
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Good one Alaska
πŸ‘οΈŽ 105
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AmishCowboy27
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 28 2019
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What do I do if I need some info about Alaska?

Alaska question

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/tannerlaw
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 16 2020
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Have you heard about all the people driving to Alaska during the Pandemic?

Yeah, they think they have a "Stay in Nome order"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SteveIsTheDude
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 29 2020
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What's the capital of Alaska?

Juneau it all along.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/P3nisPal
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 01 2020
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A man with a gold claim in Alaska was cursed.

At first the curse just brought him bad luck, causing vital equipment to break and provoking frequent but small injuries to him and his crew. Soon, however, the curse darkened and diggers the man had hired to help work his claim began to die in bizarre ways.

One was killed by an African scorpion that should never have made it to Alaska, let alone have survived the cold. A second drank a gallon of the mercury used to separate the gold from the ore. A third was found with a tree growing up through his body.

The man himself who owned the claim became more and more pale. His eyes became all white. His skin began to give off an overpowering smell of sulfur. He slept all day and at night he wandered the mountain above his claim, coming back each day looking more like a beast than a man.

The curse became so bad the last worker alive ran away to the nearest town to tell the authorities what was happening at the claim.

In an attempt to save the claim owner's life and lift the curse, a priest was brought in by dogsled to perform an exorcism on the man.

A sherriff from the town came with the priest as a bodyguard.

The exorcism was long, but apparently successful. Immediately the man's color returned, the sulfur smell disappeared, and he was able to sleep through the night for the first time in six months.

After the man awoke, the sherriff immediately arrested the man and brought him back to town with the priest. Standing in front of the judge, the sherriff was asked what charge the law had against the claim owner whose life had just been so dramatically turned around.

The sherriff looked at the man, then looked back at the judge and said in a slow and rumbling voice, "Possession as a miner."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Y2KoNo
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 28 2020
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When I visited Alaska, I kept thinking I was seeing native eye doctors...

Turns out it was just an optical Aleutian.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/aurrutia214
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 21 2020
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TIL: In ancient times, a group of Native Americans tried to cross into Russia from Alaska, but failed.

They just couldn’t get their Bering Strait.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 246
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 12 2018
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What do you call a Dog in Alaska?

A Chili Dog

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/dodus527
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 23 2019
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What do you call a pooch that lives in Alaska?

A chilly dog

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/marcuccione
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 21 2019
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If marijuana is legalized in America's 49th state, would it then become baked Alaska?
πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MinnyWild11
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 08 2019
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Im not sure if this is true, but Alaska again...
πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/blueflash316
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 30 2019
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I really thought I would enjoy living in Alaska...

... but I just wasn't that Inuit.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/patentpunk
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 30 2019
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Watching bears fish for salmon in Alaska live on YouTube when my GF asks what I'm watching.

"A live stream."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 414
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/youhitdacanadien
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 16 2017
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Why did the Russians have a hard time getting to Alaska?

They couldn’t keep their bearings straight

πŸ‘οΈŽ 87
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/BOWMASTER325
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 23 2018
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What's the capital of Alaska?

Dad: What's the capital of Alaska? Me: Juneau. Dad: No, I don't. That's why I'm asking you.

-__-

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/scumbagcoley
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 11 2014
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Why did the fisherman plan a trip to Alaska?

For the halibut!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/twowhlr
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 19 2019
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My dad just got back from a business trip to Alaska ...

I asked him how the trip was.

He said, "Oh, Juneau."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 341
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Kyle1775
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 17 2016
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10 men trapped in Alaska

I remember years ago when in my remote town in Alaska there were 10 men stuck underground. I don't recall the circumstances that got them into this situation but it was clear that if they didn't get out soon they weren't going to make it.

All of our local rescue and public services were unable to get them out and they were running out of time. With only 18 hours remaining they sent for the only expert who could help, a rescue operations legend Mr. Puh. If he could get a plane into town it could make all the difference.

I remember gathering around the radio, biting our nails, as weather conditions worsened and threatened the planes journey.

I don't remember how long I stayed awake that night, but I will never forget the words I heard when I turned the radio on in the morning: "Puh not in, ten dead."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ToyokiSonoda
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 30 2018
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There's something about Alaska's capital

You know, right?

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/EaseMeReleaseMe
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 01 2019
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It seems I can't find the border between Russia and Alaska using my compass.

I couldn't get my Bering Strait.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 21
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/lansaman
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 20 2018
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I saw this on a recent trip to Alaska. You know, you really otter... imgur.com/GIg2eRm
πŸ‘οΈŽ 114
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/lexhardcastle
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 15 2014
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Here's one of my favorite pics from my trip to Alaska.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 36
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/hokieod
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 02 2015
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I was reading Looking For Alaska the other day

Dad: I don't want to spoil much but it's just left of Canada.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 107
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/hartosexual
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 20 2014
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Why did the pelican visit Alaska?

For the halibut.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 43
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/bambu002
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 17 2013
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I thought I saw some sort of animal on an island in Alaska.

Turns out it was just an Aleutian.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/_otterinabox
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 28 2016
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Saw an Italian clown in Alaska...

Asked him how much a joke cost. He said "Itsa free-zing!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PaxPaw
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 22 2017
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I like to fly up to Alaska every once in a while just to cry my eyes out...

I find it very catharctic.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/OK_Compooper
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 01 2017
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Why does Alaska give its residents free money?

Because they don't want anyone left out in the cold

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Marzhall
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 15 2017
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My dad bought me a copy of "Looking For Alaska" by John Green...

As I unwrapped it he said, "I don't want to spoil the ending, but it's to the left of Canada".

πŸ‘οΈŽ 44
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Paul_The_Great
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 15 2016
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Have you ever had a baked Alaska?

No, I don't understand how they get the whole thing in the oven.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ENTertained_Easily
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 08 2016
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My dads joke on going fishing in Alaska this summer.

We're going just for the Halibut!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mitchec90
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 05 2014
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I was at a park in Alaska for bear watching...

And at one point there were a bunch of bears sprawled on the beach, and the rangers had put up a block in the middle of the path leading up to it with a warning about bears. I point to the thing blocking our path and ask my dad, "You know what that is?"

"What?"

"A BEAR-ier."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/zeekaran
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 25 2015
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Did you read about that girl from Alaska who turned down a scholarship from a Native American scholarship fund?

She wasn't that Inuit.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/misterkeith
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 26 2014
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What's the capital of Alaska?

Oh come on...Juneau the answer!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/bibimbab111
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 18 2013
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My dad talking about our cruise to Alaska

My mom suggested that we do a five night cruise, so of course my dad responded, "I'm on board!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/doctorflash
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 04 2014
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Mom tells story of a man in Alaska who proposed to his girlfriend using a mall Santa

Aunt: "How cool!" Dad: "Of course it's cool, it's Alaska!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Timbofieseler102
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 28 2013
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Dad: What's the capital of Alaska?

Dad: What's the capital of Alaska?

Son: Juneau.

Dad: No, I don't. That's why I'm asking you. Guess Alaska 'nother person then.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 28
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/walter923
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 13 2018
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TIL: A thousand years ago, some native Americans tried to cross into Russia from Alaska, but failed.

They just couldn’t get their Bering Strait.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 20
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 25 2018
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Alaska donkey

If it's cold

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RedditAndFries
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 21 2019
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-"What's the capital of Alaska?"

-"Juneau"

-"No I don't. That's why I'm asking."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/spainman
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 02 2016
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