What do you call a wreath made of $100 bills?

Aretha Franklins

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πŸ‘€︎ u/spireross
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2021
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My girlfriend is a square root of -100

Perfect 10, but purely imaginary.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2021
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*Steak puns 100*
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2021
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My kid asked me if it's true that some species of Whale can grow up to 100 feet?

I said it's when they're really tired after swimming too long, they can use them to walk home instead.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FuckinWimp87
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2021
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a farmer drove his son into the market and dropped him off with $100. he told his son not to buy anything except for a cow. if he couldn't afford a cow, he should use the money to get a taxi home. the son sent pics to his dad all day of the ones he thought were good until his phone died.

he just got the most expensive one he could afford for $99.99. he asked to use the cow vendors phone to call his dad. the vendor replied "sure, for $5". the kid worked out a deal to send one text with one word for one cent. he sent his dad: "comfortable"

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πŸ“…︎ May 22 2021
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It’s hard to believe that it has been more than 100 years since Einstein published his Theory of Relativity.

It seems like only yesterday.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2021
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Border patrol ordered 100 DeLoreans

They hope they can stop illegal migrants in time.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CustomAtomicDress
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2021
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πŸ’― 100 πŸ’―
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πŸ‘€︎ u/2DogKnight
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2021
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Today I donated my watch, phone and 100 euros to a poor guy

You don't know the happiness I felt as he put his knife back in his pocket

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Yankee-485
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2021
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My wife laughed, "The lottery is a tax on fools who can't do math!" I shrugged and said, "You never know! Anybody can win the lottery." Folding her arms, she asked, "Do you even know the chances of a person winning the lottery?" I shot back, "Yes!! 100%!!"

"A person always wins!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2021
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Thousand and thousands of years ago, during the last ice age, there lived an animal that excelled at trigonometry, geometry, and could recite Pi to 100 decimal places. It was known simply as.....

.....the mammothematician.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KCL80
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2021
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Over 100 years ago 2 brothers announced that they could fly.

Turns out, they were Wright.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2021
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I know over 100 languages

I just can't speak them

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2021
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THIS JUST IN: A man is still in critical condition after swallowing $100,000 in large bills.

No change is expected

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πŸ‘€︎ u/junerlegion
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2021
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I was walking with about 100 cows from one ranch to another and I had to pass through a vineyard so

I herded through the grapevine

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thkoog
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2021
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What did the hospital say to the man with 100% of his left side missing?

The doctor says β€œHe’s alright” The nurse follows β€œThere’s nothing left!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/the-t-k
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2021
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100 years ago everyone owned a horse but only the rich had cars. Today everyone has cars and only the rich own horses.

The stables have turned!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Texgymratdad
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2021
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My stressed out Mexican friend is moving to a place where one can live a life of ease on 100 centavos a day...

He needs a change of peso.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2021
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From my 3yo: what do you call a 100-year-old ant?

Antique

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πŸ‘€︎ u/djeclipz
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2021
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What do you call 100 penguins in Trafalgar Square?

Lost

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Blaringtaser
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2021
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100% effective method to not go to jail
πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BigPapaPump6969
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2020
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Physicists are playing hide and seek in the afterlife. It's Einstein turn to seek. He counts to 100, turns around and notices Newton in a 1m*1m square. Hah, Newton, I found you!

See Einstein, the problem here is that you discovered Pascal!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zsozso01
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2021
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What do you call a belt made of $100 bills?

A waist of money.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2020
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I was part of a class and i total , we were 100 students. I walked up to the front of the class , and wrote :"balloons" on the white board. So...

The other 99 read balloons.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bloodoolf
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2021
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I make Christmas wreaths for a living. So I decided I would make one out of 100 dollar bills the other day.

I call it a wreath of Franklin.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ZealousidealRise7
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
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Tennis ball machine for sale. Only $100.

Had it over a year now. Has served me well.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2021
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100% certain

Me: Are you sure the small package will completely cover my house for potential intruders?

Security company: Verisure!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kildemoles
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2021
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I just got a letter from a herb and spice company demanding the $100 I owe them.

If I don't pay them within a week, they have threatened to send the bay leafs around.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
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My hammer has 100% nail hitting accuracy

because if I miss the nail, I hit my nail

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wolf_cy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
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Expensive fruit. (iaio #100)
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MetropolisCourier
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
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How do you get 100 rowdy Canadians out of the pool?

You ask them.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anddditburns
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2020
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What lies on its back 100 ft in the air?

A centipede

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πŸ‘€︎ u/90eight
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
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I did my personal best in the 100 metres today...

85 metres.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2020
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Illusion 100
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AMswag123
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2020
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What has a 100 balls and screws old women

Bingo

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πŸ‘€︎ u/socdist
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
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I need like 100 puns!

At my high school there's an annoying dude who hates puns so if you have any really bad ones I need you to comment...

I'm gonna send him to PUNintentiary!

I won't stop till he PUNches me!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/South_Bathroom
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2021
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What do you call a wreath made out of $100 bills?

Aretha Franklins

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πŸ‘€︎ u/S_S_Sioux
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a wreath made with $100 bills?

Aretha Franklins

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jigsatics
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a wreath made of $100 bills?

Aretha Franklins

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Imnotarobot12764
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2020
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I can’t believe it’s been more than 100 years since Einstein published his Theory of Relativity.

It seems like just yesterday.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a wreath made of $100 bills?

Aretha Franklins

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πŸ‘€︎ u/larryb78
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2020
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What do you call a Christmas decoration made out off $100 bills?

Aretha Franklins

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πŸ‘€︎ u/leobloom23
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a wreath of $100 bills?

Aretha Franklin(s).

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Beardth_Degree
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
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What do you call a Christmas wreath made of $100 bills?

A wreath of Franklins

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Da_Brootalz
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2020
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What do you call a wreath made of $100 bills?

A wreath of Franklins

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jmar4234
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2020
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What do you call a Christmas decoration made of $100 bills that can play R&B hits?

Aretha Franklins.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jfshay
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
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What do you call a belt made out of $100 bills

A waist of money!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cmhenrich
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
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