I tried donating blood today... NEVER AGAIN!!! Too many questions.
Like, "Who's blood is this?", "How did you get it?"
"Why is it in a bucket?"
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︎ May 27 2021
My wife said she wanted divorce because i play too many video games
What a stupid thing to fallout 4
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︎ May 28 2021
Did you know in the 1950βs Hawaii passed a law that people were not allowed to laugh above a certain decibel due to too many noise complaints?
Now you can only do a-low-ha
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︎ May 19 2021
When I arrived onset on a cloudy, dreary day, too many actors had been hired for the small part...
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︎ May 22 2021
I used to be a judge for the world orchestra championships, but I quit because too many of them were coming out with outlandish sob stories to win me over...
Always trying to get the symphony vote.
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︎ Apr 17 2021
How many fire flies does it took too screw in a light bulb?
No one knows exactly, but it takes a lot. They aren't that bright.
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︎ Apr 01 2021
My friends say I make too many action movie puns.......
I told them I can't help it, old habits DIE HARD.
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︎ Mar 23 2021
Do you know how to tell someone tells too many bad jokes at a butcher shop?
Cuz even the beef gets corny
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︎ Apr 13 2021
What do you call it when too many people become stupid all at once?
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︎ Feb 20 2021
My wife left me because I made too many Linkin Park references
But in the end, it doesn't even matter
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︎ Dec 30 2020
A man has been found guilty of using too many commas.
The judge told him to expect a long sentence.
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︎ Jan 25 2021
Me when people tell me I make too many puns
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︎ Dec 17 2020
Iβve seen way too many Hindsight is 2020 jokes tonight.
I shouldβve seen it coming, but... you know.
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︎ Jan 01 2021
A man walks into a pet store and asks for a dozen bees. The clerk carefully counts 13 bees out onto the counter. βThatβs one too many!β says the customer.
The clerk replies βItβs a freebieβ
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︎ Mar 11 2020
My wife left me because I made too many Green Day references
Do you have the time to listen to me whine
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︎ Jan 10 2021
I got kicked out of my poetry club because I made too many Linkin Park references
But who could rock a rhyme like this?
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︎ Dec 30 2020
What do you call it if you die from eating too many chickpeas?
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︎ Dec 19 2020
Showtime has far too many commercials on their channel.
Itβs just Shameless plug after Shameless plug.
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︎ Feb 09 2021
Did you hear about the person who watched too many Shrek movies?
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︎ Dec 20 2020
A friend of mine just died from eating too many herbs
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︎ Oct 29 2020
I have made myself too many places to store books.
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︎ Nov 13 2020
Proud of my son coming up with this joke.. Doctor: donβt eat too many apples...
Otherwise you will turn into an Iron man
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︎ Dec 14 2020
Whatβs it called when you have too many aliens? Extraterrestrials.
π︎ 3
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︎ Aug 25 2020
My wife locked me out for telling too many corny, obnoxious word play jokes...
Now Iβm outside banging and hollering
βOh PUN the door!!!β
βOh PUN the door!!!β
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︎ Nov 08 2020
My grandfather died after eating too many gingerbread houses last Christmas.
Doctors said it was munch housinβ syndrome.
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︎ Nov 15 2020
The guy who did my urinalysis made way too many jokes to be a professional
It was a complete pisstake
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︎ Sep 09 2020
If you have too many 12sβ¦
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︎ Nov 13 2020
I have way too many gloves
If anyone wants them, you're welcome to take them off my hands
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︎ Sep 18 2020
I went to buy some bees from a beekeeper, I asked him for 100 bees and he counted out 110. I said "No, no that's too many" He replied...
"Dont worry, those are freebees"
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︎ Sep 23 2020
Had too many drinks at the pub last night, so the lads suggested I leave the car there and take the bus home.
Turns out I was in no fit state to drive it home either.
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︎ Jul 16 2020
So many people these days are too judgmental
I can tell just by looking at them
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︎ Aug 03 2020
Too many people have been making COVID-19 jokes
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︎ Mar 24 2020
I've been fired from work for putting in too many shifts
Keyboard manufacturing isn't as easy as you think
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︎ Apr 02 2020
What is the medical diagnosis for owning too many dogs?
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︎ Feb 10 2019
My wife blocked me on Facebook because I post too many bird puns.
Well, toucan play that game.
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︎ Mar 25 2020
people are making too many coronavirus jokes
like seriously? people die from it, its a pundemic
π︎ 12
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︎ May 19 2020
I ate too many rowing paddles
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︎ May 24 2020
Too many apostrophes for comfort.
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︎ Apr 02 2020
I don't let my kids go online. There's too many PDF files on there!
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︎ Dec 03 2019
I saw a reddit post about someone having too many Dracula figurines
I knew my brother had the same problem, but the reddit account wasn't his. I told him about it and he said it was his post, so I asked "Throw away account?" He said "Yeah, good idea, I didn't think about that"
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︎ Jun 30 2020
Too.Many.Puns.
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︎ Mar 07 2020
r/memes have too many puns...
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︎ Feb 19 2019
I got sick from taking too many supplements for my anemia.
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︎ Mar 03 2020
My boss fired me for cracking too many Asian jokes.
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︎ Jul 22 2019
Did you hear about the lumberjack who got fired for cutting too many trees ?
π︎ 130
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︎ Aug 14 2018
What do you get when you eat too many ciabatta rolls?
π︎ 3
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︎ Feb 01 2020
So many people are too judgmental these days...
I can tell just by looking at them
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︎ Jun 07 2020
So many people these days are too judgemental.
I can tell just by looking at them.
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︎ Nov 21 2019
My friend was found guilty of using too many commas.
The judge warned him to expect a really long sentence.
π︎ 201
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︎ Mar 04 2019
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