My wife told me to stop eating Christmas leftovers out the fridge
But I just can’t quit cold turkey
Always knock on the fridge before opening.
Just in case there is a salad dressing
I normally knock on the fridge door before I open it...
Just in case there’s a salad dressing
I am a proud dad today - my son ask me what this Indian bread on top of the fridge is for
I told him it’s Naan of his business
Edit: he could have replied “papa dumb”
What did the bottle of ranch say when the man opened the fridge door?
"Don't look! I'm dressing!"
Wife dropped a jar of pickles upon opening the fridge; glass and pickle juice went all over the kitchen floor.
My 10 year old son: Don't worry, it's not a big dill.
My wife while looking at me: -.-
I overcame my addiction to eating Thanksgiving leftovers directly out of the fridge.
I didn't use the 12 steps, I quit cold turkey.
My wife left a note on the fridge, saying, "This isn't working. Goodbye."
I opened it and it works fine.
For my wife's birthday I bought her the fancy new fridge that she wanted.
You should have seen her face light up when she opened it
My wife left a note on the fridge that said, “It’s not working. I can’t take it any more. I’m going to my mom’s.”
I opened the fridge door, the light came on, the beer was cold. What the hell did she mean?
It's amazing..to use the fridge at my work, you don't even need an appointment!
One of my kids ate a magnetic number off the fridge; it was the one between 1 and 3.
The doc said they would be ok “This two shall pass.”
I put a new shelf towards the top of my fridge
The steaks have never been higher
My dad told me to look in the fridge and check out the milk that went bad
I found one hard boiled egg in the fridge
It was the last one in the container. I took one bite and spit it out - no idea how long it had been there but clearly it had been too long.
"Rotten egg?" my husband asks. I agree. He says "Makes sense, it was the last one there."
I always knock on the fridge door before opening it.
I used to hate the lockdown in the beginning, but now that I have a full fridge, I am ok with it.
Scientists are calling it the Stock Home syndrome.
We have a magnetic alphabet on our fridge. The other day my daughter grabbed the letter T and put it in her in milk.
She looked at me and said, “I’m having a T party.”
I chortled.
Which table fits in the fridge?
My son asked why I keep a box of matches in the fridge
I told him it's for when I want to have a light snack
Why didn't the mayonnaise want to go back in the fridge?
Because it saw the salad dressing
I came home and saw a note from my wife stuck on the fridge: “I’m sorry. This isn’t working. You take things too literally. Goodbye.”
She will be so happy when she finds out I ordered a new one.
The other day my wife couldn’t find any apples in the fridge…
…it was a fruitless search.
I think I'm addicted to eating poultry from the fridge
Looks like I'm going to have to quit cold turkey.
I just accidentally sucked up one of my kid's alphabet fridge magnets in the vacuum
Why did the boy blush when he opened the fridge?
Because he saw the salad dressing
My coworker keeps yelling about the tray of leftovers in the staff fridge stinking up the break room...
I finally snapped and told him to just put a lid on it
You should always knock on the fridge door before opening it
Just in case there's a salad dressing
I always knock on the fridge before I open the door...
Just in case there is a salad dressing.
I'll see myself out....
What did the bottle of ranch say when the man opened the fridge door?
"Don't look! I'm dressing!"
I normally knock on the fridge door before I open it...
Just in case there's a salad dressing
I used to be addicted to eating Thanksgiving leftovers straight out of the fridge
But then I quit cold turkey.
Why should you always knock on the fridge before opening it?
There could be a salad dressing.
I always knock when I open the fridge
Just in case there's a salad dressing.
I Always Knock On The Fridge Door Before Opening It...
Just in case there's a salad dressing.
I always knock on the fridge before opening it
Just in case there is a salad dressing.
I always knock on the fridge door before opening it
Just in case there's a salad dressing.
I always knock on the fridge door before opening it...
there might be a salad dressing.
I always knock before opening the fridge
Just in case there is a salad dressing
I always knock on the fridge before I open it
Just in case there’s a salad dressing
I always knock on the fridge before opening it
Just in case there’s a salad dressing
I always knock on my fridge before opening the door
Just in case there's a salad dressing
Why do you always know ask on the fridge before opening it?
Just in case there is a salad dressing.
I always knock on the fridge door before opening it
Just in case there's a salad dressing.
My wife left a note the fridge: this isn't working. I'm going to my mom's house.
I opened the fridge door, the light was on, the beer was cold. What the hell did she mean?
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