My grandad always said: "When one door closes, another one opens"...

...Lovely man, terrible cabinet maker.

πŸ“· Removed - Punchline in title

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrGonzoDog
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2020
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Why did the Muslim get a speeding ticket during Ramadan?

He was going to fast

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cmon_Just_The_Tip
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2015
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Before my surgery, my anesthesiologist gave me the choice of being knocked out by gas or a boat paddle.

It was an ether/oar situation.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/coadnamedalex
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2019
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Do you know why Egyptians are so sad?

Because they live in misery (Ω…Ψ΅Ψ±ΩŠ)

Note for the non Arabic speakers:

Egypt = miSr (Ω…Ψ΅Ψ±)

Egyptian = miSrii (Ω…Ψ΅Ψ±ΩŠ)

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2019
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Why does a chicken coop only have two doors?

If it had four doors, it'd be a chicken sedan.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FoxyGramps
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2017
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"What are the names of all 10 reindeer mentioned in 'Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer'?"

"Well, let me see. There's Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen, Rudolf, and ... and... There are only 9 reindeer mentioned in the song."

"Nope. There's 10. You forgot 'Olive'."

"'Olive'? There's not a reindeer named 'Olive'."

"Yes there is. 'β™« Olive, the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names...β™«'

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mrmyxlplyx
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2016
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Elevator gem I found today reddit.com/r/mildlyintere…
πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pieceofcheese87
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2014
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3 Dads

R's son was on the HS fencing team. Now at College. Me: Is B on the fencing team in college? R: No. He competed in only a couple of events his Sr. year in HS. G: So he didn't stick with it. Me: If you don't keep up you get rusty. R: He lost his edge... Me: I get the point

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/C4Dave
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2016
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